December 23

Today's quotation:

Are you willing to forget what you have done for other people,
and to remember what other people have done for you. . .
to remember the weakness and loneliness of people who are
growing old. . . Are you willing to believe that love is the
strongest thing in the world. . .  stronger than hate, stronger
than evil, stronger than death. . . Then you can keep
Christmas!  But you can never keep it alone.

Henry van Dyke

Today's Meditation:

Henry makes us stop and think here--after all, Christmas is a holiday for us all, isn't it?  And is he saying that there are conditions to keeping Christmas, that we can't expect to be able to do so until we meet certain criteria?  And can he possibly be right?

I believe that the answer to this question depends upon how we see the holiday and what we see as "keeping Christmas."  If we see Christmas as a commercial holiday that's about buying and getting gifts, listening to Christmas songs, and decking the halls with boughs of holly, then there really can be no conditions upon the keeping of Christmas.

But if we see the holiday as a holy day, if we take it to symbolize the coming of love to our planet, the coming of one of the most important people to walk the planet, who taught and modeled love and compassion and our own amazing potential, then there must be more to keeping the holiday in our hearts and spirits than simply participating in the festivities.  There must be more to the spirit of the season than gifts and carols and decorations.

And if there is more to it, then we must acknowledge that the heart of the season is love.  And if we're to keep the season well, then we must be loving human beings, kind and compassionate people who see more to the world than its trappings.  We must believe in the inherent goodness of the people we meet and see, and we must walk and act in the spirit of love all the time.

Yes, there is more to "keeping" Christmas than simply taking part in the festivities.  That's because Christmas is so much more than "just" a holiday.  The question is, do we treat it as such?
  
  

Questions to consider:

How do you "keep" Christmas?

How has Christmas become so incredibly commercialized?  Have we "allowed" this to happen, or was it inevitable?  Is it necessarily bad?

What does Christmas have to do with love?

For further thought:

Best of all, Christmas means a spirit of love, a time when the love of God and the love of our fellow people should prevail over all hatred and bitterness, a time when our thoughts and deeds and the spirit of our lives manifest the presence of God.

George F. McDougall

Today's quotation:

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds,
adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.
With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do. . . .
Speak what you think now in hard words and to-morrow
speak what to-morrow thinks in hard words again,
though it contradict every thing you said to-day.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today's Meditation:

We do tend to put an awful lot of value on consistency in people.  We tend to like it when we can "depend" upon someone always to have the same opinion, always to say and do the same things in similar situations, always to be in the same places at the same times.  And there is a lot of value in being consistent, for that allows other people to put their trust in us, our words, and our actions.

But what Emerson is talking about here is foolish consistency, the tendency to hold on to beliefs or thoughts or ideas simply because we already have them.  He's talking about the person who has believed for years that smoking doesn't harm him or her, despite mountains of evidence to the contrary (including his or her own health problems).  He's talking about the person who continues to support a particular politician even when it becomes clear that the politician has violated his or her constituents' trust regularly.

Life is about--or it should be about--learning and change and growth.  We're not stagnant creatures, and we haven't been put into stagnant situations in our lives.  As we learn, so do we change and grow, and our beliefs and allegiances should change with us.  What serves us and our needs at age 20 isn't necessarily at all relevant to us at 30 or 40.  What we believed yesterday about a particular person should be different today if we've learned something new about that person.

We like to hold onto things and ideas and beliefs because we feel they're safe.  But they're not necessarily safe; we just feel that they are.  In fact, if we hold on to something that we've already learned is flawed or inaccurate, then we're committing a sad action to ourselves, allowing ourselves to be caught and held by the chains of the past while the future beckons for us to join it with our new and important knowledge.

If you realize that all things change,
there is nothing you will try to hold onto.

Tao Te Ching

December 21

Today's quotation:

Every person must follow his or her own process.  No one else knows what is right for another.  There is no goal in living our process, except to live it.  Our processes can change.  Our lives can change as we participate in the process.  Our only requirement is to trust the process and live in faith.  Our responsibility is to live out what our Creator asks of us.  To live our lives.  Living our process demands a deep spiritual commitment of being one with one's life.

Anne Wilson Schaef

Today's Meditation:

Are you one with your life?  Are you in tune with who you are and what you're meant to be and how you're meant to do things?  Can you truly say that you are--or are working towards being--committed to becoming the person you were meant to be rather than the person that so many people expect you to be?  And are you willing to accept and deal with the changes that you find in your path as you continue to live your life?

We have our lives, and we don't have complete control over them.  This is a good thing, for most of us with our limited amounts of knowledge and our limited perspectives probably would push our lives in very unpleasant directions if we did have complete control.  I remember wanting certain things desperately-- relationships, material objects, jobs--only to find out later that that person or thing or job wasn't at all what I had thought it was.  I was glad at those times that I hadn't been successful in controlling outcomes.

Deep in your heart and spirit, you know what's right for you.  Nobody else on this planet knows that.  If you can trust life and trust your instincts and trust your higher power, you'll find that life becomes a great adventure in which you discover treasure after treasure around corner after corner.  If we can be committed to allowing ourselves to live through our spirit rather than through our intellect, then we can be one with our lives, for then we'll be focused on who we are and what we can truly give, rather than on what we want and expect ourselves to be based on outside influences and expectations.

You are a great and fascinating marvel, and it's important that you recognize that fact so that you can allow yourself to follow the processes that life has in store for you.  When you know that you are a marvel, then you'll know that your life has purpose and meaning other than that that your intellect assigns to it, and you'll let that purpose and meaning shine through in all that you do as you flow with the river of life rather than fighting the current.

Questions to consider:

Are you one with your life?

Do you trust the processes of life, or do you try to control them and make them turn out how you want them to turn out?

What processes have you noticed recently in your life?  Do you try to guide those processes, or do you let them guide you?

For further thought:

Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states
we have to go through.  Where people fail is that they wish
to elect a state and remain in it.  This is a kind of death.

Anais Nin

December 19

Today's quotation:

Those who surpass their fellow citizens in virtue are no
longer a part of the city.  The city's law is not for them,
since they are a law to themselves.

Aristotle

Today's Meditation:

I believe that some of us do reach this point in our lives, a point at which the laws of our society are no longer necessary for us.  After all, if we no longer have any urge whatsoever to do anything harmful to our fellow citizens, then laws become irrelevant.  Laws are made for the protection of the people of a society, and if we pose no threat at all, then what point laws?

Personally, I've always been amazed at the number of people who get nervous around police officers.  I've never been nervous myself, for I know that I have nothing to be nervous about.  Police officers are there to enforce laws that are broken, and since I'm not breaking any laws I don't feel at all intimidated by their presence.  And since the city's laws are in place to regulate the city, once we are no longer in a place in which laws affect us, we functionally are no longer a part of the city except in paying taxes and fees.

Of course, Aristotle wrote these words before the advent of the automobile, which led to many traffic laws that are easier to break--even inadvertently--than laws that protect our fellow citizens from harm.  He wrote this before we were taxed on almost everything we own, before we became subject to literally thousands of laws ranging from noise regulations to the copying of music in our own homes.

But his basic message remains intact--adopting a life of virtue gives us freedom, a freedom that we can love and appreciate.  Our lives become richer and more full when our virtue keeps us free from worry.  I never worry about the police coming to my home to conduct a raid, for I simply don't feel a need or desire to break any major laws, and therefore those who enforce and make the laws really have no influence over me.  My actions are guided by my desire to lead a good life, not by my fear of facing retribution if I break a law.

Questions to consider:

How would you define a "life of virtue"?

What kinds of laws--if any--do you break regularly?  What kinds of penalties do you face?

Are there any laws that you feel unfairly keep you from being or expressing yourself?  What might you do about those laws?

For further thought:

When people are pure, laws are useless;
when people are corrupt, laws are broken.

Benjamin Disraeli

Today's quotation:

The world is not in need of saving; it is perfect
in itself--it is not a mess to be fixed up.  It is
harmonious and whole, and it is our responsibility
to harmonize with it, not change it.

A Spiritual Warrior

Today's Meditation:

Sometimes it's easy to want to fix the world, isn't it?  After all, there's so much that needs fixing, so much poverty to eliminate, so much pollution to clean up, so much strife to calm.  But is it really our place to want to fix up a world that we can't see truly?  After all, this world of ours is an incredibly vast, extremely old planet that hides from us much more than our limited vision allows us to see.  This world works on its own terms, and it seems pretty clear that much of the discord in the world occurs because people simply aren't willing to let the world be the world--to accept it as it is and try to harmonize, to cooperate with it.

As people we like to fix things.  But once we start trying to do so, we no longer are modeling the behavior that's opposite of what we're trying to fix--we're now modeling anti-whatever behavior.  For example, Mother Teresa said that she'd never be a part of an anti-war demonstration; she would, however, take place in a pro-peace demonstration.  This attitude illustrates the difference between wanting to fix things and wanting to add something positive to the world.

The world's in fine shape, except for some of the damage that we've done to it.  And we would accomplish much more if we were to embrace the notion of modeling behavior that will embrace the world and treat it well so that it can continue to exist on its own terms.  Modeling this perspective will allow us to contribute something positive to the world rather than trying to find flaws and eliminate them.  Flaws will go away on their own as we improve the ways that we treat the world, and that sort of treatment must start with each of us as individuals.

Harmony is a beautiful word, and it would be a wonderful thing to share with this beautiful world of ours.

For further thought:

There is enough for all.  The earth is a generous mother;
she will provide in plentiful abundance food for all her
children if they will but cultivate her soil in justice and in peace.

Bourke Coekran  

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Today's quotation:

Somewhere, in the back of your mind, try to remember that everything has God's fingerprints on it.  The fact that we can't see the beauty in something doesn't suggest that it's not there.  Rather, it suggests that we are not looking carefully enough or with a broad enough perspective to see it.

Richard Carlson

Today's Meditation:

Beauty is a wonderful part of life, though we very often get so caught up in life that we don't see all of the beauty that's there before us.  Life offers us many beautiful things in every moment in which we live, and if we want to see and appreciate them we have to remember that they're actually there, and that there's something for us to get out of them.  From a simple blade of grass to the eyes of a friend to an astonishing sunset, life offers us much to see, feel, and appreciate.

This beauty isn't there for itself.  Beauty unappreciated, after all, isn't beauty at all, is it?  But how does our appreciation affect us in positive ways?  How can simply recognizing and feeling good about beauty help us to make our lives fuller and richer?

Imagine having a treasure that you never find--it's somewhere in your back yard, but you never take the time to look for it.  Imagine having a million dollars and never spending any of it--the money most definitely could improve our lives if we use it wisely, but when it's locked away, it doesn't help us a bit.  Beauty is like that--it can give us bright treasures to appreciate and improve our lives with, but if we don't look for it, we may never see it at all.  And if we don't see it, then we don't make it a part of our lives that can help us.

William Wordsworth spoke of having a host of daffodils in his "mind's eye," in his memory, which benefited him long after he saw them when he was able to recall the "host of golden daffodils."  The image was peaceful and relaxing to him.  Likewise, we can store up our own experiences with beauty and keep them for times when their memory just may help us through stressful times.

For further thought:

The beauty is forever there before us, forever piping to us,
and we are forever failing to dance.  We could not help
but dance if we could see things as they really are.
Then we should kiss both hands to Fate and fling
our bodies, hearts, minds, and souls into life with
a glorious abandonment, an extravagant, delighted
loyalty, knowing that our wildest enthusiasm cannot
more than brush the hem of the real beauty and joy
and wonder that are always there.

Margaret Prescott Montague

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and danci

December 16

Today's quotation:

This, I believe, is the great Western truth:  that each of us
is a completely unique creature and that, if we are ever
to give any gift to the world, it will have to come out
of our own experience and fulfillment of our own
potentialities, not someone else's.

Joseph Campbell

Today's Meditation:

How beautiful is our uniqueness!  How wonderful are the completely individual and unique gifts that we can give to this world of ours and the people and other creatures in it!  One of the most amazing advantages of our current world is the way that we all have opportunities for giving to the world, in many different ways, via any of a multitude of different routes.  Had I been born even 100 years ago, I would not have had nearly as many chances for contributing to this world as I do now--my world would have consisted of a small home on a small plot of land or in a large city, and I probably would have stayed completely anonymous to all but my own little world.

Today we all have a chance to contribute to the world.  Today we have many chances to use the gifts and talents that we have to make a difference in the lives of others, often in the lives of complete strangers.  Today more people than ever have access to education and training that can help them to reach goals that never would have been possible yesteryear, and these are truths that could and should have a profound impact upon our lives.

No longer do people need to live vicariously through the child, the brother, the sister, or even the friend down the street who "beats the odds" and becomes a doctor or lawyer or athlete or entertainer.

You are a very beautiful, completely unique creature who has amazing potential to help others and to contribute to the world.  You are--this is simply the truth.

So what are you going to do about that?

Questions to consider:

What are your strongest gifts?  How do you use them?

Does everyone recognize and appreciate their own uniqueness?  Why might someone not do so?

What kind of contribution can you make to the world today?

For further thought:

How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment, we can start now, start slowly changing the world!  How lovely that everyone, great and small, can make their contribution toward introducing justice straightaway. . . . And you can always, always give something, even if it is only kindness!

Anne Frank

Today's quotation:

We do not receive wisdom--we must discover it for ourselves, after a journey through the wilderness which no one else can make for us, which no one can spare us, for our wisdom is the point of view from which we come at last to regard the world.

Marcel Proust

Today's Meditation:

I'm always amazed at just how many wise words that I read, only to go out and commit very unwise actions on a fairly regular basis.  My attempts to develop my own knowledge from the gathered knowledge of other people is only somewhat successful--sometimes I simply do something quite silly even after being exposed to possible actions that would have been much wiser.

And I don't say this to criticize myself, but simply to act as an observer of my own actions.  I've come to find that Marcel is right--I do have to discover, or perhaps uncover, wisdom for myself.  I think that the readings that I do help me to build a base from which I'm able to recognize and accept my wisdom much more readily and quickly, but the bottom line is that I do uncover my wisdom in the process of my journey through the wilderness, in the trials that I face, and in the obstacles that I overcome.

I find that as time goes on, I'm also much more in tune with Marcel's last line, that my perspective of the world is a result, or a reflection of, the wisdom that's built up inside me.  My wisdom helps me to refrain from judging, to see the beautiful even in what seems not to be beautiful, to feel the love and sincerity from sources that seem to have none.  My wisdom allows me balance, equanimity, from which I'm able to experience the world in richer and fuller ways.

We must not be discouraged if building our wisdom is a slower process than we feel it should be.  I can build knowledge simply by reading, but my wisdom is deeper and it must be built more slowly and carefully through experience.

For further thought:

Wisdom is not to be obtained from textbooks, but must
be coined out of human experience in the flame of life.

Morris Raphael Cohen

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December 14

Today's quotation:

No person can wear one face to him- or herself
and another to the multitude without finally
getting bewildered as to which may be true.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Today's Meditation:

The question of who we are to ourselves versus who we are to other people is an important one to consider.  We've all known the people who think themselves to be kind and considerate and well-loved, never suspecting that most other people can't stand them or the things they do.  We've seen and met the people who quite hypocritically say that they're one thing and act like something else.  It's not pleasant for us to witness this, and it does not lead to a pleasant life for people who act this way.

If we're going to be true, it's important that we're first of all true to ourselves, and then true to the other people in our lives.  In order for both of these conditions to be met, there must be congruence between the face that we put on for ourselves and that we put on for others.  We must make sure that we're not lying, that we're being truthful both to ourselves and to other people.  Otherwise, we will reach a point at which we're not quite sure just which person we are truly, for the faces we've presented are not of the same people.

I've heard and read many accounts of the man who's loved at the office and the life of the party, but who gets home and acts like a tyrant, treating his family terribly.  Everyone's surprised when his wife leaves him, because he's such a "nice guy."  But why could he never be nice to his family?

So who are you?  Are you the person who talks to a young child, the person who makes jokes with co-workers, the person who talks tenderly to his or her spouse, or the person who's frustrated in line at the bank?  If we take care to be honest at all times, then each of these people will be consistently you.  If we insist on playing roles and allowing our actions and thoughts to change depending on which people we're with, then it will be very hard to be sure of just which one is the true us.

We can confuse ourselves, or we can be true and never doubt just who or what we are.  And doesn't it sound better to live without confusion simply because we've chosen to be honest always, to everyone? 

Questions to consider:

What different kinds of faces do you show to the world?

How do we get into the habit of showing different kinds of faces?  Why do we tend to maintain the habit?

How can we develop the habit of presenting congruency in who we are at different times?

For further thought:

I have never been aware before how many faces there are.
There are quantities of human beings, but there are
many more faces, for each person has several.

Rainer Maria Rilke

December 13

Today's quotation:

Happiness is inward and not outward; and so it does
not depend on what we have, but on what we are.

Henry Van Dyke

Today's Meditation:

This is a basic premise of happiness, a principle that we see repeated over and over again, and one that we most definitely should continue to remind ourselves.  Happiness is, indeed, an inside job.  We cannot make ourselves truly happy with anything that we own or possess, but only through a deep and abiding knowledge and love of ourselves, our world, and our place in it.  We can be happy only by making our thoughts happy, for our thoughts are what guide us through life and bring more of life to us.

During our time here on this planet, we will become something.  Actually, each day that we live we become something and someone new.  That person we are inside determines what we do, what we give, and whom we help and how we help them, and that comes only from inside.  Who we are inside determines our character, helps or hinders us from finding peace, pushes us forward or pulls us back, and keeps us on a sane and healthy road or leads us down unhealthy and destructive paths.

Our inside lives lead us to make decisions on every aspect of living, and those decisions lead inevitably to results with which we must live.  None of our possessions can help us to make such decisions, and while our friends can give advice, the final decision always is our own.  And it always will come from the person we've become, the person we've made ourselves into based on our previous decisions.

Develop your character and become the person you truly want to be, and you'll find that happiness results as a by-product.  Search for happiness by building your stock of possessions or by trying to find it in outside sources, and you will find that happiness simply is not there; you may get momentary satisfaction on a surface level, but deep happiness will evade you.

Questions to consider:

How does the momentary satisfaction of getting something nice make us think that it's "happiness"?

In what ways can we develop our happiness?

Why do so many people find happiness to be something that's difficult to achieve, when it's there inside us all the time?

Today's quotation:

The secret of success is this:  there's no secret of success.

Elbert Hubbard

Today's Meditation:

The most important message of all concerning success is that since each one of us will define success and determine success based on our individual wants, needs, and callings, there simply can be no secret that encompasses everyone.  There are certain principles that one can follow to achieve great numbers of sales or high grades in school or even healthy relationships, but the idea of success is such a unique idea for each of us that there's no way that there can be a secret of success that will work for everyone.

And that's not a negative thing to say.  Our uniqueness is one of our greatest assets; our individuality is one of the things that's most worthy of celebrating in this life of ours.  So why should we imagine that there can be one path to success, one secret that applies to everyone?

If I want to be successful, then I must follow my heart.  But following my heart may keep me earning much less money than following my logic would--but are my accomplishments any less valuable because of that?  I can be successful on my own terms, following my own muses, but not following any secret that's been passed on from someone else.

Perhaps the point that Elbert may be trying to make, in different words, is that "there's no set of rules that will guarantee success."  Or perhaps he's saying that everything that we need to succeed in the world is already before us and within us, and that it isn't any secret at all.

No matter how we read his words, though, it's important to keep in mind that the only true success is the success that comes from us following our hearts, our consciences, and our passions.  Such success will be the most gratifying of all, and the most long-lasting.

For further thought:

People succeed because they believe,
not only that they can and will succeed,
but also that success is worth the price they pay for it.

Tom Hopkins

December 11

Today's quotation:

I believe that every right implies a responsibility; every
opportunity an obligation; every possession a duty.

John D. Rockefeller, Jr.

Today's Meditation:

These are three dirty words for some people:  responsibility, obligation, and duty.  After all, who wants to deal with these words when there are such nice words right there with them:  right, opportunity, and entitlement?  The first three demand something of us, while the last three give something to us.

One of the most important measures of character, though, is the way that we deal with our rights and responsibilities.  Do we take our rights for granted and shirk our responsibilities?  If we do, then we can be sure that we're not fulfilling our purpose here on this planet, for in that case we'd be giving nothing at all to our fellow human beings.  If on the other hand we appreciate our rights and live up to our responsibilities, then we can be sure that we're at least approaching the fulfillment of our purpose here on this planet.  For then we'll be giving to others in the best ways that we know how.

We don't get or take in this life without being asked--and rightly so--to give something back.  And it's in the giving that we see who we truly are, and what we truly believe in.  We can truly see the measure of the person in the balance that he or she strikes between taking and giving back, though the two may be in completely different areas.  One may receive tons of money, yet give back with time or energy to different causes, and that's fine.  The worst we can do is forget that what we receive does imply that we need to give something back, somewhere, anywhere.

Questions to consider:

What kind of balance do you strike between giving and getting?

Why do some people tend to avoid fulfilling responsibilities and obligations?

Why is there such a relationship between rights and responsibilities, opportunities and obligations?

For further thought:

Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more.

Anthony Robbins

December 9

Today's quotation:

If there was nothing wrong in the world
there wouldn't be anything for us to do.

George Bernard Shaw

Today's Meditation:

I've always been of the opinion that if it weren't for problems, few of us would have jobs.  Much of our work consists of dealing with problems, after all, and those problems are what keep most of us gainfully employed.  George seems to agree with me, and he points out that if we're going to have anything to do, then there had better be something wrong!

But what does this mean to us?  Why is this relevant?  Quite simply, if we can adopt and keep this perspective, then we'll stop complaining about problems when they come us.  And since complaining is wasted energy, we'll have much more energy left to do other, more productive things.

When difficulties arise, we often spend a lot of time complaining about them, denying them, avoiding them, dreading them.  But problems are what life is all about--our problems are our best teachers, for they keep us thinking and they keep us using our creativity to try to solve them.  A life without problems would be a dull life after all, as we'd fall into ruts of complacency rather than keeping our lives dynamic as dealing with troubles can do for us.

In the film The Matrix, one character explains that human beings who were being used as batteries (we produce a lot of power, after all) produced almost no energy at all when they were given memories and thoughts of utopian societies, yet those same people produced much more energy when their minds were given many problems and setbacks in their lives.

So the next time something wrong happens, rejoice!  This is the very thing that keeps you dynamic, growing, and full of energy.  When something is wrong, we're learning and growing, and who could ask for more than that?

Questions to consider:

How do you view problems in your life?

Why and how do we learn that problems should be avoided?

Do you learn more from dealing with problems or from doing the same things, problem-free, all the time?

For further thought:

For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about
to begin--real life.  But there was always some obstacle
in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid.  Then life would
begin.  At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.

Alfred D'Souza

Today's quotation:

The human race has had long experience and a fine tradition
in surviving adversity.  But we now face a task for which
we have little experience:  the task of surviving prosperity.

Alan Gregg

Today's Meditation:

"Surviving prosperity."  Doesn't this sound like an oxymoron, like "jumbo shrimp" or "working vacation" or "Microsoft works"?  (Just kidding, Microsoft--I use and appreciate your products!)  The words don't seem to go together, but when we stop and think about them it's very obvious that they do.

There's a huge difference in our lives during prosperous times and difficult times.  In the difficult times, our problems tend to give us a purpose, something to struggle against, something that challenges our creativity and our ability to persevere.  Human beings tend to rise naturally to a challenge, and that fact helps us to make the most of the bad times.  Adversity helps us to reach down deep and pull from resources that we simply never would have known are there if we hadn't been forced to access them by our situations.

In prosperous times, though, we have to create our own motivation.  There's very little that we have to do in order to survive--our survival is a given, save for the possibilities of accidents or illness.  And many people simply aren't able to motivate themselves, or even to find challenges in areas that are appropriate for them to pursue.  In trying times, we have a purpose of survival, yet in times of plenty we have to define our purposes ourselves.  And those people who aren't able to do so, unfortunately, tend to lead purposeless lives, moving from thing to thing for no particular reason other than they can't think of anything else to do.  And this is often where drugs and alcohol and so many other problems come in.

In trying times, we band together to help each other out.  In times of prosperity, we stay by ourselves, and whether we realize it or not, we miss the deep connections with our fellow human beings.

I don't want simply to survive prosperity.  I want to appreciate the gift of prosperity and thrive in it, making the most of my life.  I want always to have a purpose, or two or three, to keep me going.  And I know that no one else can define that purpose for me or approve of it--it's all up to me if I want to survive prosperity.

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Today's quotation:

I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and
the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven
and the angels.  I have enough for this life.

Pearl S. Buck

Today's Meditation:

How many things do we spend a lot of time thinking about that are completely out of our realm of control or influence?  How often do we get stuck thinking about something like heaven, which we can't see or touch or feel while we're here, completely ignoring the beauty and wonder of this world we're on in the meantime?  It can be kind of frustrating to see other people neglect their responsibilities, not help their fellow humans, or even kill other people because of what they believe will be coming when they reach heaven.

"Everything in its time."  There will be a time in our lives when heaven is relevant to us--and that will be when our time here on earth ends, and our bodies die.  Until then, though, if we focus on it we're taking time and energy away from those things that are relevant and important to us now.

I've moved quite a few times in my life, and I know how it feels to be focused on something other than the here and now.  I've sometimes spent so much time thinking about where I was moving to and what it was going to be like that I completely lost focus on the present, on the things that were in my life currently.  Sometimes I even gave up on things like making and keeping friends because I knew that I'd be leaving soon, so why should I continue to make new friends or maintain old friendships?

Do we really want to get so caught up in thinking about what may come after this life that we neglect this life?  I've known people who do so, and it's not a pretty sight to see--their lives are full of disappointment and dissatisfaction because nothing that they have or do can compare favorably to what they see heaven as being.  Personally, I prefer to be absorbed in the wonder of the earth--I'll have plenty of time to think of heaven and its angels, in whatever form that consists of, when my time here has come to an end.  But until my time here has ended, it's still my time HERE.

For further thought:

I'm reminded of the story of the Sunday School teacher who asked the class, “How many of you want to go to heaven?” Everyone raised their hands except one little boy.  The teacher asked, “Johnny, don’t you want to go to heaven when you die?”

“Oh,” he said, ”when I die. I thought you meant now.”

Richard R. Crocker

Today's quotation:

What one doesn't realize in ordinary mental health
is that daily life is a show.  You have to put on a
right costume, to improvise right speeches, to do
right actions, and all this isn't automatic--it takes concentration and work and a simply amazing
degree of control.

Herman Wouk

Today's Meditation:

In other words, we're all accomplishing something pretty remarkable every day.  We're living our lives, doing our jobs, saying the right things, wearing the right clothes.  We've learned systems and structures, and we're functioning fully and appropriately within those systems.  We've become pretty adept at doing the right things based on other people's expectations of us.

But just how comfortable should we be with this knowledge?  This ability of ours isn't necessarily a negative thing, and it doesn't necessarily keep us from living a full and happy life.  And if we look at it the right way, we actually feel a sense of accomplishment for showing the control and concentration necessary to pull off starring in the show every day.  But is starring in the show necessarily what we want to do?  Is there room in our worlds for pulling out of the show and doing our own thing, completely on our own terms?

I believe there is, but I also see that there's a great deal of value that we can contribute by remaining in the play.  As a teacher, I'd accomplish very little without students, and in order to be able to stay at schools it's necessary for me to play the required role to a certain extent--and push the envelope in ways that I truly believe will help my students.  And my ability to play the roles expected of me then can have a very positive effect on my students, as long as I'm an effective teacher.

Sometimes we get down on ourselves for conforming, for doing things that are expected of us.  But that's not always--nor necessarily--a negative part of our lives.  In fact, we should give ourselves credit for it when we do it well.

For further thought:

We are half ruined by conformity;
but we should be wholly ruined without it.

Charles Dudley Warner

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December 2

Today's quotation:

A person desperately searching for love
is like a fish desperately searching for water.

Deepak Chopra

Today's Meditation:

Can it really be that love is everywhere, as Deepak claims?  When so many people feel unloved and unwanted, is it really possible that love is as common all around us as water is around fish?  While there have been many times in my life when I've felt completely unloved, I have to say now that I agree with him:  my feelings were simply that--feelings--and had no basis in reality.  I was so caught up in my feelings that I refused to see the truth of the matter, that love was all about me all the time.

But I was confusing love for romantic love.  I was hoping for that special relationship, that special someone for whom I'd fall head over heels, and who would fall the same way for me.  I knew that my family members loved me, but I was sure that there was no other love in my life.  And my attitude made it difficult for people to show their love for me, for I would not be receptive to feeling that there were people who cared for me if they weren't that special someone.

I see now how wrong I was then.  I see now how silly I would have looked from the outside--how I was searching and hoping for something that already was a huge part of my life.  There was love around me, but I refused to see it.  I denied its existence even when I saw it, as it wasn't in the form in which I wanted to see it.  And since it didn't meet my expectations, it was easy for me to be so very wrong.

Love is all around us.  It was yesterday, it is today, and it shall be tomorrow.  The question we have to ask ourselves is simple:  are our minds and hearts open enough to see it, to recognize it, and to accept it?  I wasted a lot of time not feeling the love that was there about me, and I know that I'll never get that time back.  Ten years from now, I don't want to think of the current time in my life as also being time that I've spent searching for something that's right before my eyes.

Questions to consider:

Have you ever felt that your life was devoid of love?  Why?

Why might we spend so much time searching for something that is all around us all the time?

What would a fish searching for water find, and how would it find it?

For further thought:

The supreme happiness of life is the conviction
that we are loved; loved for ourselves,
or rather loved in spite of ourselves.

Victor Hugo

Today's quotation:

Learn from the earliest days to inure your principles
against the perils of ridicule:  you can no more exercise
your reason if you live in constant dread of laughter than
you can enjoy your life if you are in the constant terror of death.

Sydney Smith

Today's Meditation:

What Sydney's saying is that if we're very sensitive about what other people think of what we say and do, then we've made the choice to be sensitive--we've made the choice not to build up our resistance to other people's ridicule and laughter.  If we fear ridicule, then we can't act as we believe we should, and we may do things that we probably shouldn't.

So it's up to us to inure ourselves against ridicule.  The stakes are pretty high if we don't, for then we'll be letting other people's possible reactions determine the actions that we take.  We'll be turning ourselves into marionettes and handing the strings to anyone whose ridicule we fear.

Some of the people who later in life have been regarded as the most intelligent, most creative, or most innovative have dared to step outside the normal boundaries of their chosen fields and risk the ridicule, teasing, or even insults of other people.  To them, their own vision was more important than what others might say about what they were doing.  They trusted themselves and their own reason, and they were able to reach their dreams and goals and visions no matter how many obstacles they faced.  They simply didn't let other people get and keep them down.

One can develop an immunity to some poisons by continually giving themselves small doses of that poison.  They inure themselves against the poison so that it no longer can affect them.  The ridicule of others is poison to our spirits, and it's important that we develop an immunity to it so that we may live our lives free of the fear of losing our potential because of what someone else may say to us or about us.

For further thought:

Ridicule is like a wolf:  it destroys only those who fear it.

unattributed

Today's quotation:

Success or failure, the truth of a life really has little
to do with its quality.  The quality of life is in
proportion, always, to the capacity for delight.
The capacity for delight is the gift of paying attention.

Julia Cameron

Today's Meditation:

It's somehow odd that we don't focus more on our capacity for delight, our ability to find joy in our day-to-day lives.  When I read Julia's words, I think of a kid coming away from an amusement park saying that he or she didn't have any fun.  When asked why, the child says, "Because I was worried about how I'd feel when the fun was over."

Do we do this?  I know that I do.  I've been in some absolutely delightful situations that I haven't enjoyed nearly as much as I could have because I've been thinking about something else, worrying about something that I had no control over, or simply haven't immersed myself in the activity or situation.  But is the quality of my life really in proportion to my capacity for delight?  My instinct tells me that it is, that Julia makes a lot of sense here.  My capacity for delight helps me to appreciate things, helps me to feel more deeply, helps me to share my joy with others.

Paying attention to the world around us is a gift, and if we can feel delight in a sunset, a rainbow, a baby's smile, a young kid's artwork, time spent with a good friend, then we've got a lot of life taken care of.  If we can feel delight, then we're guaranteeing that we will appreciate and pay attention to this beautiful world of ours.  It guarantees that we won't bore ourselves or take things for granted, and it ensures us that we will receive the gifts that are offered us.  Everyone is offered the gifts of this world, after all, but it's relatively few who receive them with open arms and hearts and delight to have them in their lives.

For further thought:

A person will be called to account on judgment day for every permissible thing that he or she might have enjoyed but did not.

The Talmud

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November 29

Today's quotation:

Live all you can.  It's a mistake not to.
It doesn't much matter what you do in particular,
so much as you LIVE while you're doing it.

Henry James

Today's Meditation:

I often ask myself what the difference is between living and simply surviving, spending time on this planet breathing its oxygen and eating of its food, but not really living our lives.  Who defines the term "live"?  Can anyone truly define it?  And is my concept of living the same as yours?  There really are not answers to these questions, but this seems to be a case in which asking the questions is much more important than finding answers.

Living, I believe, consists of putting ourselves out there and exploring the questions that come to our hearts.  What does it mean to be a loving person?  What does it mean to be compassionate?  What does it mean to me to enjoy myself and have fun?  From which activities do I get the most satisfaction and fulfillment?

Unfortunately, the questions that most of us pursue are ones like, How can I pay the bills?  Which job will pay the most?  Which new activities will fill up my time more?  How can I find more and better entertainment?  And when we ask ourselves these kinds of questions and pursue their answers, then we aren't looking to live, but to survive.  We're looking for answers outside of ourselves to questions that come from inside, and the answers simply aren't there.  We may find what seem to be answers for the short term, but they almost never translate into long-term solutions to anything.

The only problem with what Henry says is that he doesn't tell us how to do so.  And that's partly because each one of us has to find out how on our own.  There is no one solution that's valid for everyone; rather, we need to start to focus on the questions that can lead us to life as we seek out answers.

Questions to consider:

What kinds of questions do you ask yourself when you're seeking answers to what life's all about?

What does it mean to you to "live while you're doing it"?

How many people do you know who live all they can?  How do they do it?

For further thought:

Affirmation of life is the spiritual act by which people cease
to live unreflectively and begin to devote themselves to
their lives with reverence in order to raise them to their
true value. To affirm life is to deepen, to make more inward, and to exalt the will-to-live.

Albert Schweitzer

Today's quotation:

Happiness is the realization of God in the heart.
Happiness is the result of praise and thanksgiving,
of faith, of acceptance;
a quiet tranquil realization of the love of God.

White Eagle

Today's Meditation:

God is in our hearts--in your heart, in my heart, in the hearts of your best friend and worst enemy.  God is the connection between us, the force that keeps us together as the spiritual beings that we are, the one thing that we all have in common no matter where we are or what we're doing.  God is in our hearts because he loves us and because he wants the very best for each of us, and the best thing that we can give back to God is our praise and thanksgiving for all that we have, our faith in all that is good and best for us, and our acceptance of our lives as they are right here, right now.

And these things will bring us happiness.  The happiness will be a result of our thankfulness, our peace of mind, our acceptance, and our compassion for our fellow human beings once we recognize and accept our connection to them.  We can't feel such a connection without also feeling compassion, for only then will we have a deeper understanding that all of our fellow human beings have been going through the same trials that we've been going through, just in slightly different ways.

We are loved, by the God in our hearts and the God who also is in the hearts of all the other people we see.  For this we can be thankful, and our gratitude will open other doors in our lives, other windows through which we can see and feel and understand the lives of our neighbors and co-workers and friends and all the strangers whom we see each day.

Thanksgiving opens our hearts, and it gives us a clearer vision of the God who loves us and all others equally.  The realization of that love--and our acceptance of it--can be one of the most beautiful, life-affirming elements of our lives.

For further thought:

I believe in the absolute oneness of God and therefore of humanity.
What though we have many bodies?  We have but one soul. . . . I know God is neither in heaven nor down below, but in everyone.

Mohandas K. Gandhi

Today's quotation:

To live a life of gratitude is to open our eyes to the
countless ways in which we are supported by the world
around us.  Such a life provides less space for our
suffering because our attention is more balanced.
We are more often occupied with noticing what we are
given, thanking those who have helped us, and repaying
the world in some concrete way for what we are receiving.

Gregg Krech

Today's Meditation:

This world with its resources and the people in it who make use of those resources really does a marvelous job in providing for us.  We as a species really do want for nothing, in spite of the fact that our appetites and desires grow broader constantly.  We have everything we need to live full and fulfilling and healthy lives here on this planet that gives us everything we need to do so, in "countless ways."

Only when we realize the depth and number of the many gifts that we get from the world around us can we begin to appreciate those gifts in a real way.  The trees give us oxygen to breathe and lumber with which we build.  Water helps us to live and keeps the trees alive.  Animals provide us with food and labor and clothing and companionship.  Beauty is everywhere, from the magnificence of mountain views to the songs of the birds.  Materials that we take from the ground build our houses and are used for cars and other goods.  Animals that died thousands of years ago provide us with fuels to keep us warm and keep us moving.  The list is pretty much endless.

With all that said, just how grateful are we to the earth?  Just how often do we stop and say "thank you" to this planet for all that it provides for us?  If we view it as an inanimate object, of course, we may say that we can't really thank an object.  But are we really in tune with exactly what the earth is, especially if we don't even keep ourselves aware of all that it does for us, all that it gives to us?

Gratitude that we feel for the earth may not affect the earth at all, but it sure can be beneficial to us as we keep in mind all the wonderful blessings that this planet gives to us on a regular basis.

For further thought:

If the Earth does grow inhospitable toward human presence,
it is primarily because we have lost our sense of courtesy
toward the Earth and its inhabitants, our sense of gratitude,
our willingness to recognize the sacred character of habitat,
our capacity for the awesome, for the numinous quality
of every earthly reality.

Thomas Berry

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Today's quotation:

It’s the individuals who know how little they know
about themselves who stand a reasonable chance of
finding out something about themselves before they die.

S.I. Hayakawa

Today's Meditation:

We generally don't try to find something out if we feel we know enough about it already.  We won't go out of our ways to learn more if we think there's nothing more to learn.  And most people tend not to think about the possibility that they don't know much about themselves; after all, who knows more about us than we ourselves?

But isn't it true that this isn't necessarily so?  How much of our time each day is spent focused on things that are outside of ourselves--jobs and relationships and problems and responsibilities, those million-and-one things that keep us thinking about things other than who we are, what we think is important, what's valuable to us as human beings?  And if we stay focused on those things outside of ourselves, how can we possibly learn a lot about things that are inside of us?

Only when we acknowledge the possibility that we may not know a lot about ourselves can we actually think about learning something about ourselves.  And there's so much there to learn--so many beautiful, interesting, fascinating, and perhaps even scary things to learn.  But in our limited time on this planet, it's unfortunate that so few people will take the time and make the effort to do so.

Our first step is quite simple--accept the fact that much of who we are is a mystery to us.  Then all we have to do is start to work on unraveling the mystery and learning about this wonderful person we each are.  It's potentially the most rewarding work we ever can do, so why wait until tomorrow to start learning about someone who's so very close to us?

For further thought:

Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.
If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.

from the Tao Te Ching

November 19

Today's quotation:

The first thing to do in life is to do
with purpose what one proposes to do.

Pau Casals

Today's Meditation:

How often do you take the time to define the purposes for your actions in your life?  This isn't a skill or a habit that most of us have been taught--in fact, it's something that most people never will do.  Even though I've studied and read about this concept pretty regularly, I still do much of what I do without defining a purpose for it beforehand.  Often I can make the claim that the purpose is implied in the action, and while that may be true, it doesn't do anything to make the action more effective or more helpful to anyone at all.

To do something with purpose is to do it with something particular in mind, some accomplishment that will come of the action.  Having this idea in mind will give strength to the action by giving us stronger focus not just on what we're doing, but on the desired outcome.  And while it's also important to stay flexible and realize that the outcome may turn out to be something different than we foresee, having our focus on a purpose will make it more likely that what we do will turn out as positive as it possibly can.

The first thing to do, then, is to have a purpose behind what we do.  I tell this to students who are writing--a paper without a purpose is pointless.  And we can define the purpose beyond what our bosses or friends or family members expect--it's completely up to us.  And when we can imbue our projects with that purpose, then we've gone a long way towards creating conditions for success in anything that we propose to do.

Questions to consider:

Why can giving purpose to our projects make them more valuable?

What's the first step in developing a purpose for what we do?

How easy is it to focus on a task when there's no clear purpose to it?

For further thought:

Great minds have purposes, little minds have wishes.

Washington Irving

Today's quotation:

It is, of course, a trite observation to say that
we live "in a period of transition."  Many people have
said this at many times.  Adam may well have made
the remark to Eve on leaving the Garden of Eden.

Harold MacMillan

Today's Meditation:

Sometimes it's kind of funny to see how quickly we adopt a certain catch phrase or buzz word.  We use the words without seriously considering their truth or applicability; since so many other people are using them, they must be appropriate, right?

I think Harold's point here is important.  We're all living "in a period of transition," all the time.  Even if our jobs are somewhat stable right now, our spiritual life may be going through many changes.  Or perhaps we're dealing with emotional change, or developing better relationship skills or dealing with the death of someone close.  No matter what things look like from the outside, we can be sure that we're always going through transition--after all, change is life, isn't it?  And life is change.

Likewise, society is constantly experiencing transitions--in attitudes, in what's acceptable and what's not, in political and social trends.  So in addition to our own personal transitions, we're also experiencing change on a broader scale.

It's our awareness of these many changes that will make them valuable to us.

So yes, we're living in a period of transition.  The question is, what will you get from it?  How will you learn from the transitions to enrich your own life and the lives of those around you?  What can you do to make these transitions as valuable as you can to as many people as you can?  And how can you ensure that the changes won't overwhelm you as you move on with your life?

For further thought:

Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to life.
The only completely consistent people are the dead.

Aldous Huxley

Today's quotation:

The only limit to our realization of tomorrow
will be our doubts of today.  Let us move
forward with strong and active faith.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Today's Meditation:

What doubts do you have today?  I have more than I'd like to admit.  Mine often have to do with finances and earning money, as well as relationships and other elements of my life that are too personal for public sharing.  I usually feel that my doubts are a result of past experiences, of situations in the past that have led to situations of the present--because things often haven't gone so well in the past, I tend to doubt that they'll go well tomorrow.  After all, I can base my thoughts of what's to come only on my own experience, right?

Well, probably not.  I realize that very often, what doesn't come to pass doesn't come because of my doubts.  In other words, I wasn't right to doubt because of my knowledge or experience, but I actually caused certain things to happen or not to happen because I doubted their possibility.  And I continue to do this, even after I've realized the cause-and-effect relationship between my own thoughts and what happens in my life.

Faith, of course, is the belief that things will happen in spite of a lack of evidence.  And if we can have faith in tomorrow despite what's happened in our past and present, then we'll soon come to realize many of our dreams and desires.  Our faith simply can make things happen, just as our doubts can prevent them from happening.  So instead of allowing our doubts to prevent good things from coming to us, with a bit of faith we can actually guarantee that they will.

The only limit to making tomorrow a great day is our own doubts.  This is a shame because it's completely unnecessary and self-defeating.  Faith isn't the easiest thing in the world to develop, but it can be one of the most important if we're ever to reach fulfillment.  Life wants to give us the good and the beautiful, and it will do so as long as we don't doubt that the good and the beautiful lie in store for us tomorrow--and perhaps even later on today!

For further thought:

We never encounter a mountain greater than doubt.
Doubt is a deceiver.  It is as a thief in the night.
Remove it, do not let it come nigh your dwelling.

Frater Achad

November 16

Today's quotation:

When you can, always advise people to do what you see
they really want to do, so long as what they want to do
isn't dangerously unlawful, stupidly unsocial or obviously
impossible.  Doing what they want to do, they may
 succeed; doing what they don't want to do, they won't.

James Gould Cozzens

Today's Meditation:

We all will be asked to give advice sometimes.  Some of us, of course, will be asked more than others, but the simple fact is that there will be someone in the world who will want to ask us our advice.  And when we're asked, it's very tempting to give them advice based on what we want or like, advice that is based on our experience and our views of the world.  But should that really be the basis for advice for other people?

Or should the basis of our advice be on societal definitions of success, such as climbing the corporate ladder (a high-stress proposition), making lots of money, having a house that's too big, or driving an expensive car that costs twice as much to get you somewhere as a less expensive car would?  Do we want to give people we care for advice that would keep them stuck in difficult financial situations?

Or do we want to advise them to follow their dreams and ambitions, because life is very short and we need to make the most of it while we can?  Do we want to tell them about people who are doing what they love to do, and thus never actually going to work?  Should we tell them about people who make less money than others, but who are very happy doing something for which they have a great passion?

"Success" is a relative term.  Making more money doesn't make one more successful; doing a great job because you love to do it is definitely success.  The rewards are much greater, and they happen much more consistently.

And besides, shouldn't any advice we give to others come from a place of love and caring, and be given with the hope that it will help to make them happier people? 

Questions to consider:

What kinds of advice do you normally give to others?

Which of your personal experiences do you generally pull from as a basis for the advice you give?

Why does so much of our advice to others seem to be based on what makes us happy?

For further thought:

I have found the best way to give advice
to your children is to find out what they
want and then advise them to do it.

Harry S. Truman

Today's quotation:

There are as many nights as days, and the one is just
as long as the other in the year's course.  Even a happy
life cannot be without a measure of darkness,
and the word "happy" would lose its meaning if it
were not balanced by sadness.  It is far better to take
things as they come along with patience and equanimity.

Carl Jung

Today's Meditation:

I think that most of us react so strongly to sadness or despair partly because we're afraid that the conditions that have caused the feelings will last forever.  When sadness comes along, when depression hits, when we feel a lack of hope that things will get better, it's very easy to get caught in the trap of losing sight of the good in life, losing our ability to see the bright sides of our lives.  And once we lose sight of those things, it's logical to fear that they'll never come back.

But when night comes, we don't enter into a fit of despair out of fear that the day won't return.  The darkness is easy to deal with when we're sure that the light will return.  Carl is saying here that even in our darkest hours, we should keep in mind always that our bright hours and days shall return--and if we do keep that idea in mind, the darker hours won't seem nearly as dreadful, and they won't be able to pull us down nearly as far.

Bad things will happen to me.  People I know will die.  People I know will be hospitalized and will have bad things happen to them.  My patience and my ability to see the beauty in life will be tried.  People I know will offend me and try to hurt me.  But no matter what may come, my own feelings are tempered by my perspective--the way I feel is up to me, not to these situations.  If I can respond to anything that happens with the realistic perspective that "This, too, shall pass," then I'm setting myself up for much less misery during my trying times.

Life is balance, in many ways.  We can consciously balance our feelings and our reactions to outside stimuli in order to keep ourselves seeing the reality of our situation--that life is full of cycles, and that this negative part of the cycle will soon give way to the more positive elements of my life.  And those positive parts haven't even left--I just see them less clearly now.

For further thought:

The soul would have no rainbow
had the eye no tears.

John Vance Cheney

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November 13

Today's quotation:

Too many people spend money they haven't
earned, to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.

Will Rogers

Today's Meditation:

How true this is, especially in these days when marketers have an unprecedented ability to intrude into our lives in an effort to convince us that we "need" things that we don't actually need.  We face a constant barrage of materials that have been created with the help of study after study that has examined consumer behavior so that they can be more effective.  And more effective in what?  In getting us to buy things that until we saw the ad, we didn't even think we wanted.

Buying things, though, is always a decision.  It's important that we look at our decision-making with a sense of clarity, though, in order to be able to spend our money on things that we truly need, and to spend within our means rather than beyond our means.  After all, we're not here on this planet to impress other people--we're here in order to grow and to love and to share our lives with others, aren't we?

Many people create many worries for themselves by spending more money than they've earned, and those worries definitely affect their ability to enjoy life and living.  The consequences of not being able to pay bills are pretty drastic, and the consequences of spending everything you earn each month to pay bills also are pretty drastic, and they can greatly diminish the joy of our experiences here on this planet.

Do you really want and/or need everything that you buy?  How much of our buying is done on impulse, or done to impress others?  As long as we ask ourselves the important questions when we are buying--do I really need this, can I afford this?--we can help ourselves to spend wisely and thus help ourselves to live without much of the stress caused by money problems.

Questions to consider:

What are your most important criteria for deciding whether to make a major purchase?  A minor one?

Why has the influence of advertisers and marketers grown so strong?

How might we learn to counter the effects of marketing in our lives?

For further thought:

Don't tell me where your priorities are. Show me where
you spend your money and I'll tell you what they are.

James W. Frick

Today's quotation:

We must overcome the notion that we must be
regular. . . it robs you of the chance to be
extraordinary and leads you to the mediocre.

Ute Hagen

Today's Meditation:

In our family, "Weird is good."  Whenever one of us does something that goes against the norm or that seems to be a bit strange, we tell that person, "You're so weird!"  And the response is always, "Yeah, and weird is good!"

In this way we allow ourselves to stray from the normal--and not just to stray from it, but to embrace the abnormal, the different, the unusual.  In the regular things of life, there's very little--if anything--left to be discovered.  Because so many people strive to be "regular" every day of their lives, they take away the new and the extraordinary from that regular side of life, and they convert it into the boring and the usual.  Mediocrity rules in the regular because the regular doesn't encourage us to take chances or to move in new directions or to try to find the new and extraordinary.

Our whole lives long, we're encouraged to be regular by teachers, parents, friends, relatives, and other members of society.  If we're "regular" kids, we won't embarrass our parents.  If we're regular in the classroom, the teacher won't face any new or different challenges.

There are times when being regular can be valuable.  My employer would like it if I can maintain a certain degree of regularness in my job.  My step-kids would appreciate it if I'm regular in my financial dealings so that they don't face serious financial problems in their future.

But regular doesn't have to rule our lives.  There's much of the extraordinary out there in the world, and if we're to find it, then we have to look for it.  And we can't do that by settling for mediocrity and boring status quos.

For further thought:

Success, recognition, and conformity are the bywords
of the modern world where everyone seems to crave the
anesthetizing security of being identified with the majority.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Today's quotation:

Whatever you are by nature, keep to it; never desert
your line of talent.  Be what nature intended you for,
and you will succeed.

Sydney Smith

Today's Meditation:

One of the most painful things that I witness over and over is when people desert their true natures because they think that acting some other way or doing other things will bring them more acceptance by others.  But if some people will be more likely to accept me because of an act I put on, are those really the people I want to be with?  I don't think so.

The hardest part of staying true to our nature is defining what our nature actually is.  Not every situation in our daily lives helps us to determine or to follow our true natures.  Not every reaction that we have to every situation reflects our true nature, and while we may be patient by nature, a rough day most certainly can lead us to acting more than a little impatient.  And my nature may be that of a shrewd businessperson, but when I make a mistake I may not seem so shrewd at all.

What are your talents?  What kinds of things come the easiest to you?  These are things that you cannot desert, for in deserting them you're rejecting gifts that can make your life much happier, much more whole, much more fulfilling.  Your future success depends upon you being true to your nature and sticking to those things that you love to do and that you do well.  Success that comes from such a plan is true, lasting success, not the fleeting success that comes from playing the games the way that others think you should play them.

In sports we see people stick to the positions that they love to play and that they've trained to play.  Likewise in life, we have gifts in certain areas that are deeply imbedded in our natures, and sticking to those gifts can help us to live our lives fully and completely.

For further thought:

I've never sought success in order
to get fame and money; it's the talent
and the passion that count in success.

Ingrid Bergman

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November 8

Today's quotation:

Committing yourself is a way of
finding out who you are.  One finds
one's identity by identifying.

Robert Terwilliger

Today's Meditation:

My identity is already within me, waiting patiently to be exposed to the light of the world.  My identity is truly unique, and it will shine forth as long as I let it shine forth.  One of the most important ways that I can let it do so is by committing myself to things that truly matter to me so that I can give more of my passion and my abilities to whatever it is I'm committed to.

I recently took a year to live in the Grand Canyon.  In order to do this, I had to take a job that wasn't in my chosen field of teaching.  Needless to say, while I was working at the lodges at the Canyon, I wasn't doing work that helped me to uncover my own identity.  I gave all I could to the work and I learned a lot from it, but I didn't identify with it.  Once I began teaching again, though, I immediately started to feel differently about myself and my life, for I was committed to something that was in line with who I am and what I have to contribute to the world.

Some of us are businesspeople.  Some are soldiers, some are customer service oriented, and some are cashiers or teachers or carpenters or landscapers.  And all are great professions, as long as we're committed to something that helps us to discover our true, authentic identity in the midst of so many different ways of living and being.  Only in committing ourselves fully to something can we discover our own identity--a half-hearted commitment will lead us only to a glimpse of who we are behind the facades that we've learned to put up over the years.

You have a unique identity, but sometimes it doesn't shine through because you don't identify with something--a hobby or profession or ideals--to which you're able to commit yourself fully.  Without that commitment, things stay inside of us, never let out and never exposed to the light of the world.  And the light of the world is exactly what it needs to see in order to be able to grow and develop and thrive!

Questions to consider:

To what kinds of things do you fully commit yourself?

Why might so many people have difficulties committing themselves?

Have you found your authentic identity?  How did you do so, or what has kept you from doing so?

For further thought:

The value of identity of course is that
so often with it comes purpose.

Richard R. Grant

Today's quotation:

The two important things I did learn were that you are
as powerful and strong as you allow yourself to be,
and that the most difficult part of any endeavor
is taking the first step, making the first decision.

Robyn Davidson

Today's Meditation:

If you want to take the challenge, then you have one or more difficult decisions ahead of you today.  If we accept the premise that today is the first day of the rest of our lives, then we also must keep in mind that we will make decisions today that will affect the rest of our lives.  The question is this:  will all such decisions be reactions to things that happen to us and around us, or will we take the initiative and make a decision or two that will put our lives on a particular path that we wish to be on?

Perhaps today is the day to start that novel by writing the first few paragraphs.  Perhaps today is the day to call the friend or relative with whom we've had a falling out, and it's time to mend fences.  Maybe this is the day to start reading the book we've always wanted to read, or to get started on the project we've been dying to work on, or to commit ourselves to volunteer somewhere in town where we can make a bit of a difference in the lives of other people or even of abused or neglected animals.

Sometimes we put off such decisions because we hardly feel strong enough to continue with our lives as they are--so why would we add more into the mix?  But our strength is amazing, if we allow it to be--we can accomplish pretty much anything we wish as long as we're willing to put ourselves out there and take some risks and push the envelope a bit.  There's more than enough energy in this world for us to have as much as we need, and the more we stretch the limits of our own strength, the stronger we become in any field or practice.

So which first step will you take today?  What decision will you make that will get you started in something new and different?  What kinds of things might you do to push your self and your life in new and exciting directions?  All it takes is a decision, and then the action of following through on that decision.  You are a strong person, and perhaps it's time you prove that to yourself.

For further thought:

Each indecision brings its own delays and days are lost
lamenting over lost days. . . What you can do
or think you can do, begin it.  For boldness has magic,
power, and genius in it.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Today's quotation:

The one person who most blocks you from a full, happy,
and successful life is you.  They are therefore wise who
make themselves an asset.  We can be our own worst enemies
or best friends.  We can be a source of trouble or a cure
for trouble.  So if you feel empty, as many do, start by
getting free from yourself as a first stop to vibrant living.

Norman Vincent Peale

Today's Meditation:

In a very real way, I would love to be free from myself.  I do limit myself through my fears, my wants, and my beliefs.  I keep myself sometimes in negative situations when I don't allow myself to think past my fear or my worries, or when I feel that something may go wrong and I may get blamed for it.  I sometimes act as my own worst enemy when I focus on lack and need rather than on abundance and prosperity, and sometimes I even bring other people down because of my own fears.

It doesn't have to be that way, though.  I can live a full and vibrant life if I allow myself to do so, if I allow myself to be my own friend and bring cures for troubles into my own life.  I don't have to "fix" myself, but I would help myself a great deal if I were to focus on the positive things in my life, and focus on making my life full, happy and successful rather than focusing on the limitations that I've carried around with me for oh, so long.

Who am I to me?  Am I a helpful person, giving myself plenty of opportunity to lead a full and happy life, or do I hold myself back through my own actions, keeping myself from "vibrant living"?  It can be a very difficult step to recognize this tendency in ourselves, and an even more difficult step to admit it and accept it, but there is no more necessary step for most of us if we want to live happy and fulfilling lives.  I want to be my own best friend in that I never want to keep myself from being happy, in any way at all.  And only I can make sure that I stay out of my own way, and make myself one of the greatest assets of my own life.

For further thought:

One of the most common words in the invalidating, self-blaming
stories we believe about ourselves or our situations is the
word “should.”  The psychologist Albert Ellis has coined the
phrase “Stop shoulding on yourself.”  When you tell yourself that you
should feel or be another way, you are likely to feel bad
about yourself.  As an alternative, try telling yourself that
it is okay to feel or be the way you are, even though you
have some idea that you should feel or be different.

Bill O’Hanlon

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Today's quotation:

One does not "find oneself" by pursuing one's self,
but on the contrary by pursuing something else
and learning through discipline or routine. . . 
who one is and wants to be.

May Sarton

Today's Meditation:

It's always interesting to me to hear people talk about finding themselves.  Whenever they say that they're trying to do so, the first thought that always enters my mind is, "Well, here you are, standing right in front of me."  And while I know that there's more to the idea than knowing where the physical self is, I also know that finding oneself more than likely is simpler than most people believe.  I think the major problem is that most people haven't defined or identified just what they're looking for, and therefore have no idea what they've found even when they do find it.

May's words resonate with me.  In most of my experience, I find that the best things come to me when I'm focused on accomplishing something that's important to me or someone else.  I find that keeping my mind occupied in a certain pursuit allows my subconscious mind to work on other things, and keeps my conscious mind--and thus the trouble-maker ego, also--out of the search for things like peace or happiness or my inner self.  You see, the ego wants to find things on its terms, not on the object's terms.  The ego doesn't want to accept things as they are, but to receive things just as the ego wishes to receive them.  Life doesn't work that way, but just try telling that to your ego!

Discipline and routine are great teachers, and we would do ourselves a great favor if we would stop searching so hard and so actively and allow things to happen.  I searched for years for a steady relationship, trying to make it happen whenever I met a woman, only to stop searching finally when I realized the damage I was doing myself.  A few months after I stopped searching and started focusing more strongly on the work I was doing, I met the woman who was to become my wife.  I didn't try to make anything happen, but just tried to enjoy her company, come what may.  A year later, we were married, and we still are, eleven years later.

By shifting my focus, I finally learned a lot about who I was and who I wanted to be.  And in learning that, I became a more attractive person to others, for I was much more enjoyable to be around--much less stressed out, and much less desperate.

For further thought:

If you observe really happy people you will find them
building a boat, writing a symphony, educating their children, growing double dahlias in their gardens, or looking for
dinosaur eggs in the Gobi desert. They will not be searching
for happiness as if it were a collar button that has rolled
under the radiator. They will not be striving for it as a goal
in itself. They will have become aware that they are happy
in the course of living life twenty-four crowded hours of the day.

W. Beran Wolfe

November 1

Today's quotation:

It's important that people should know
what you stand for.  It's equally important
that they know what you won't stand for.

Mary H. Waldrip

Today's Meditation:

Clarity is an important element of our lives.  Clarity at the bottom line is simply being clear about something--our thoughts, our beliefs, our values.  And while it's not necessary for us to impose our values upon others in order to live full lives, it is important that we take care of ourselves by making sure that other people treat us as we wish to be treated.  And they can't do that unless we let them know our standards so that they can treat us according to those standards.

There are certain words that I never want to hear--they're simply unacceptable to me as a human being.  There are certain ways that I won't accept people talking to me, for they make me feel basically awful.  There are certain standards that I set for myself in my life that I want others to respect, and if I truly respect myself, then I'll insist that others respect me, also.

It's not about setting rules or trying to get people to act in certain ways.  It's not a question of setting unattainable standards that no one else can meet.  It's also not about being rigid or inflexible.  It is about self-respect and the maintenance of our own dignity.  You and I both deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, and sometimes we simply have to set standards if we want to be treated as we deserve to be treated.

There's a very short list of things that I simply won't stand for, for I realize that other people see life differently than I do.  They don't see the harm in things that I see harm in, and I don't feel a need to make them see things my way.  But those things on that short list are very, very important to me, and if I want to treat myself well, I do need to let others know what I will and won't stand for.

Questions to consider:

What sorts of things won't you stand for?

Do you let others know what types of things you will and won't stand for?

How can you let people know in a sensitive way what you won't accept?

For further thought:

Ulysses S. Grant was in the company of men who began
to make off-color and ribald jokes.  Grant stepped in
and told the men to cease making such crude jokes as it
was inappropriate.  One man replied, "But sir, there are no
ladies present."  Grant returned, "But there are gentlemen."

unattributed

Today's quotation:

Fear is a question:  What are you afraid of, and why?
Just as the seed of health is in illness, because illness
contains information, our fears are a treasure house
of self-knowledge if we explore them.

Marilyn Ferguson

Today's Meditation:

We don't usually like to explore our fears, do we?  After all, our fears are quite frightening, and they keep us thinking about things that we aren't good at, things that we do poorly, or things that turn us into nervous wrecks.  Our fears also control us in many ways, and it can be intimidating to confront things in our lives that do that, just as it can be extremely difficult to confront an intimidating person or situation.

But Marilyn makes a very good point when she compares our fears to illnesses.  Our sickness can have a lot to teach us about how we're living our lives.  They can make us aware of having too much stress, too little relaxation, too much conflict, too little exercise.  They can help us in our lives if only we take the time and make the effort not just to pay attention to them, but also to take action based on what we learn from them.

Likewise, our fears can be one of the most positive parts of any change that we desire to make in our lives.  Our fears can show us just where change will be the most positive, just where we might search for a course or a program that will teach us methods for dealing with certain areas of discomfort.  So the next time you feel fear welling up in you and starting to control your actions, pay attention to the questions, as Rilke said.  What are the questions that fear is pointing out to you?

And once you know what those questions are, only then can you put yourself on the road to answering them, and hopefully putting your fears to rest, where they belong and deserve to be.  After all, teaching can be difficult, and our fears have tried for a long time to teach us what we need and want to learn; we just haven't been paying attention.  Yet.

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Today's quotation:

Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty, and each action will be meaningless.  Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness.

Kathleen Pedersen

Today's Meditation:

I suppose it's rather easy to feel that our decisions aren't all that important.  Some of them, after all, are quite minor and don't really have much of an effect on our lives or the lives of other people.  Or so we think.  Perhaps the fact is just that the minor ones are easier to make, so we don't think so much about our commitment to those particular decisions.

But if our hearts aren't into our decisions, then just what do those decisions mean?  If our beings aren't tied into the decisions that we make, then how can our actions provide us with the satisfaction that they provide us with when we are truly committed to our decisions?

Making decisions with the entirety of our being doesn't necessarily mean that they're written in stone, and perhaps that's why many people aren't willing to put everything into every decision they make.  Perhaps they're afraid of doing something permanent that can't be undone even if it turns out to be a mistake.  But changing a mistaken decision is as simple as putting our whole hearts behind a new decision.

Decision-making is one of the most important skills we can develop if we want to be happy.  Being confident in our decisions and making them based on what we truly feel to be true and important is the only way to make decisions that we not only can live with, but can thrive and prosper as a result of their making.  Unfortunately, we learn to make decisions off the cuff, and we learn to belittle the significance of many of the decisions we make each day.  It's time to unlearn the learning that trivializes decision-making, and make the process one of the most important parts of our lives.

When one bases one's life on principle,
99 percent of his or her decisions are already made.

unattributed

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October 29

Today's quotation:

I do not want to die. . . until I have faithfully made
the most of my talent and cultivated the seed that
was placed in me until the last small twig has grown.

Kathe Kollwitz

Today's Meditation:

This is a beautiful image--I love the idea that each of us was born with a seed inside of us that will grow into a full tree, beautiful and amazing, if only we provide it with conditions that will allow it to grow.

And what are those conditions?  Simply this:  using the talents and abilities and gifts that we were provided with in order to contribute something to the world, in order to give something in just the right measure, in ways that only I can contribute.  If I do so, then I grow and learn and develop those gifts so that they're even more beneficial to the other people who inhabit this planet with me.

I will one day die.  That's okay.  But as many people have said throughout history, I don't want to die knowing that I've never lived.  And if I don't use the very special talents that I have, then I can be pretty sure that I won't truly live at all.  But that problem is easy enough to remedy before it happens.  All we have to do is first, be aware of what our talents are and second, make every effort that we can to use those talents as well as we can.  We don't have to change the world with them, of course, but we can add something very valuable that may combine with someone else's contribution someday to make something even bigger and better.

Someday I'd like to see myself as a huge tree, providing precious shade for people during hot summer days, and perhaps shelter during rainstorms.  I'd like to provide a beautiful show in the autumn, and come back to help give people hope for renewal in spring.  I'm building that tree now, helping it grow and become more than it would be if I left it to grow on its own.  It does take effort on my part, but oh, what a result the final product will be!

Questions to consider:

How do you contribute to the process of growth for the seed that was placed in you?

What are the possible results of neglecting that seed?

What can you do at this moment to help that seed to thrive?

For further thought:

Never turn away from your gifts.
In their expression lies the power to release you.

Karol M. Wasylyshyn

October 28

Today's quotation:

If they give you ruled paper, write the other way.

Juan Ramon Jimenez

Today's Meditation:

I rarely allow paper to tell me how to write.  Sometimes it's convenient and helpful to write on the lines the way that they go on the sheet, but for the most part I see in paper almost endless possibilities for expression.  I'm in the minority, though, I know.  When I've told my college students to write however they wish on their paper, 99% of them still insist on writing with the lines.  After all, that's what they're used to doing, and that's what's easy.

I can't think of anything positive that comes from that, though.  It's behavior that certainly doesn't get us into the habit of being able to look at things in new ways.  Some of the best advances in life and technology come about when people see new ways of doing old things, or new uses for old tools.  Being able to see things in new ways is a skill that can be practiced, and if we want to begin the process then we need to start somewhere, don't we?  And what better place than an ordinary piece of lined paper that can be used in so many different ways?

A friend in college had a great influence on me--he was majoring in art, and he was able to see almost everything in different ways.  I started to think of him as walking around everything, seeing it from the sides and back and bottom and top while everyone else just looked at it from the front.  I admired him for that, and I took that lesson from him to heart.  I do my best always to look at everything in different ways, and my life is much richer because of it.

So the next time you're faced with a piece of lined paper, take a chance:  write perpendicular to the lines!  Write on the lines, write in circles, write in mirror image--it doesn't matter what you do, because you'll be seeing a new way to use something with which you've become so comfortable that you now take it for granted.  And once you do this, keep it up and try to see the world for all the potential it offers, rather than seeing the limitations that a set-in-stone perspective offers.

Questions to consider:

Have you ever written against the lines on lined paper?

Why do we tend to stick to writing on the lines?

Why are so few people willing to break the rules?  (Pun intended--sorry!)

For further thought:

Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it.

Henry David Thoreau

Today's quotation:

Josh Billings said, It is not only the most difficult thing
to know oneself, but the most inconvenient one, too.
Human beings have always employed an enormous variety
of clever devices for running away from themselves, and
the modern world is particularly rich in such stratagems.

John W. Gardner

Today's Meditation:

Avoidance is such a scary word.  How many of us could know ourselves extremely well if we only weren't so scared of finding out more of ourselves--perhaps because we're afraid that what we'll learn about ourselves will be disappointing. . . or maybe even frightening?  And because so many people are so afraid, we've turned the avoidance industry (also known as entertainment, sports, etc.) industry into probably the most lucrative industry in the world outside of fossil fuels.

What kinds of things can I do today that will help me to keep from getting to know myself even better?  Anything that's passive and that depends on someone else doing something, that's what!  And while entertainment in itself can be an extremely important part of our lives, providing relaxation and laughter and learning for us all, if we become too dependent upon it, it can and does harm us.

And God help us if we seek our avoidance in drugs or alcohol.  Then are we not only harming ourselves in a very real, very physical way, but also harming those whom we love and who love us in very real ways, too.  Our altered states can not be positive for other people, for they need us to be someone steady, someone whom they can trust and upon whom they can depend.

You are an extraordinary person.  I am an extraordinary person.  But the people who probably recognize these facts the least are, unfortunately, you and me.  Give something else up, release some avoidance technique in your life, and use the space that appears in your life to get to know yourself.  You won't regret it--and it may be the most important change you ever make in your life.

For further thought:

When we become expert at loving and caring for ourselves,
we feel healthy, centered, and strong.  We don't need to
escape from our reality through shopping, eating, drinking,
drugging, or losing ourselves in abusive relationships.
We feel warm and safe within ourselves.

Susan L. Taylor

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Today's quotation:

You must constantly ask yourself these questions:
Who am I around?  What are they doing to me?
What have they got me reading?  What have they
got me saying?  Where do they have me going?  What
do they have me thinking?  And most important,
what do they have me becoming?  Then ask
yourself the big question:  Is that okay?

Jim Rohn

Today's Meditation:

Sometimes it may seem awkward trying to analyze the effect that our friends and acquaintances have on us.  At times it can seem to be too judgmental a thing to do, too harsh an exercise.  But all of us have experienced watching other people being brought down by the people they choose to hang around with, and it could be useful sometimes if we were to take a step back from our own situations and try to look at them objectively.  How are the people in my life affecting me?  And if the answer to that question is "poorly," then what do I need to do to fix the situation to make it healthy once more?

Other people affect me, and I have to admit that I've spent more time with negative people than I would have liked to spend.  Sometimes I've been around people who have brought me down in significant ways, and it's taken me far too long to recognize what was happening and find other people who would affect me more positively to spend time with.

What do the people in your life have you becoming?  If you spend another ten years with the same people, where will you be ten years from now?  If the answer is that you'll be a more compassionate, more caring, more giving person, then you're probably around people who are good for you.  If your answer is that you'll be wealthy enough to be financially independent and completely out of debt, and still a caring and compassionate person, then that's great, too.

But if your answer is something less than you are now, if you don't like the answer that you see, then you'll want to consider changing the people you're with.  After all, not everyone we meet is destined to be an intimate friend, even if sometimes we pursue friendships for reasons other than mutual benefit.  If someone you know brings you down, then just how will you be able to lift up someone who needs your support?

For further thought:

If you make friends with people who are without
character, your own character will tarnish as well.

Anon

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Today's quotation:

Just as you would not neglect seeds that you planted with the
hope that they will bear vegetables and fruits and flowers,
so you must attend to and nourish the garden of your becoming.

Jean Houston

Today's Meditation:

Not long from now, I will be someone different.  I will have new experiences and new learning behind me, and I will have changed some of my beliefs based on what I will have learned.  I constantly am becoming, constantly am moving on with my life.  But do I just sit back and assume that because I'm breathing, I'm becoming?  Or do I try to nourish myself in the process of becoming, helping myself to grow through reading and listening and watching and taking good care of myself overall?

If I do attend to myself and provide myself with the nourishment I need to grow--not just to maintain the status quo--then I'm giving myself the opportunity to become something very special, indeed.  If I attend to myself then I provide myself with unlimited potential.  If, on the other hand, I neglect myself by providing only my very basic needs and nothing more, then my potential is only to stay the same, and nothing more.

Seeds need watering, but seeds and seedlings also need constant attention.  They need to have the weeds around them pulled, for those weeds will use up all the water and nutrients that could help plants to grow.  Likewise, we need to be constantly vigilant to recognize the things that we do or have that rob us of our vigor, that hold us down or back, that prevent us from growing and becoming the beings that we're meant to be.

Please don't neglect yourself--you deserve far much more than your own neglect.  Treat yourself as you'd treat a tender seed, or a young seedling, with care and respect and attention.  You are a very special person, and what you can contribute to the world can only grow as you grow yourself.  You can't expect yourself to grow without helping yourself to do so, and you're definitely the most important helper that you'll have in your life.  You deserve the best treatment of all.

For further thought:

Just as gardeners cultivate their plots, keeping them free from weeds, and growing the flowers and fruits which they require, so may a person tend the garden of his or her mind, weeding out all the wrong, useless, and impure thoughts, and cultivating toward perfection the flowers and fruits of right, useful, and pure thoughts.  By pursuing this process, a person sooner or later discovers that he or she is the master-gardener of his or her soul, the director of his or her life.

James

Today's quotation:

Why be afraid of what people will say?  Those who
care about you will say, "Good luck!" and those who
care only about themselves will never say
anything worth listening to anyway.

J.Z. Knight

Today's Meditation:

Sometimes I'm quite amazed at how much time in my life I've spent being concerned about what other people think or say about me.  And yes, as much as I hate to admit it I find that I still have concerns about it.  But the feeling is just a feeling--in my mind I know that what other people think or say really doesn't matter for all practical purposes.  But just try to get my mind to affect those feelings. . . .

I always tell other people not to worry about what others say because those whose opinions truly matter will tell you things that are complimentary and encouraging.  If someone wants to tell me negative and discouraging things, though, then it's quite obvious that the person isn't one of those people who are truly worth listening to.

Discernment is an important gift for many of us, but it also is a skill that can be strengthened if we practice it regularly.  Which people truly matter in our lives?  Just because we're acquainted with someone doesn't necessarily mean that the person is someone who's going to add to our lives in positive ways.  And if they're not adding in positive ways, then why worry about what they're going to to say to us in any given situation?

As for me, I want to be one of those people who always say "Good luck," or "Way to go," or "You're quite a special person."  I want to be a person whose opinion other people find important not because I always compliment for no real reason, but because I give sincere encouragement always--for it's something we all can use, all the time.

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October 23

Today's quotation:

People spend too much time finding other people
to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not
being what they are capable of being, and not
enough energy putting themselves on the line,
growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.

J. Michael Straczynski

Today's Meditation:

Energy.  We all have it.  We all spend it.  We all need it just to be considered alive.  But when was the last time that you actually considered how much energy you're spending in which ways?

As a teacher, there are certain behaviors in my students that I let slide because I have to consider the trade-off in energy--is controlling those particular behaviors worth the amount of energy it would take from me to attempt to control it?  If the answer is no, then I know that it's more important for me to use my energy delivering a lesson or working with students than it is to try to deal with certain behaviors.  I choose how to spend my energy.

Most people don't make it a choice because they never consider how they're spending their energy.  I know many people who spend a lot of energy blaming others, but little energy being productive.  I know people who spend energy talking about and criticizing others, but almost no energy telling those people how they might improve what they do.  Personally, I don't want to spend energy making excuses, for that would mean that the energy is wasted, never to be reclaimed.

There are many, many positive uses to which we can devote our energy.  Encouraging others, complimenting others, being creative, praying, taking care of our bodies with exercise--the list probably is almost endless.  But before we can spend our energy in positive ways, we must be aware of the fact that we're spending energy with everything that we do, and we must have made the decision to spend our energy in positive ways.

Let's get on with our lives--by spending our energy in positive, uplifting ways.

Questions to consider:

On what kinds of things have you spent your energy today?

Are there things on which you spend your energy that you would rather not spend it on?  How might you change things?

What does "growing out of the past" mean?

For further thought:

How have you spent most of your energy today?
Have you spent any of it contributing to the peace
and hope and love of the world?  Have you spent
any of it in fretting or worrying or trying to control
others?  My guess is that if you're like most of us,
you really haven't thought too much about it.
Ironically enough, we're quick to turn down the
thermostat in the winter because we know that
we have to pay the bill for the oil or electricity
that keeps our houses warm.  In that case, we see
a direct correlation between the energy spent and
the cost to us in money.  But do we ever think
about the cost to us of using our own energies
unwisely?  What do we miss out on when we lay
waste our powers?  What are some of the effects
of spending our energy in ways that
are not helpful or healthy?

unattributed

October 22

Today's quotation:

I would be true, for there are those who trust me;
I would be pure, for there are those who care;
I would be strong, for there is much to suffer;
I would be brave, for there is much to dare.

Howard Arnold Walter

Today's Meditation:

I love to read material that illustrates my connections with the world around me.  I love to be reminded that there are some things that I should be because other people will benefit from that.  This type of reminder helps me to keep in mind that fact that what I do is not without cause or purpose--rather, what I do always has a purpose if my intentions in doing what I do are based on helpfulness, compassion, courtesy, and respect for the other human beings who share this planet with me.

You see, there are those who trust me, and one of my goals in life has to be to live up to their trust.  And there are those who care about me, so I try to keep myself as someone who is deserving of their caring.  And I and others will suffer in life, so my strength can help us work our way through any suffering.  And life is full of opportunities and possibilities.  If I'm a daring person, then I'll be able to take advantage of those chances and make my life something special, living much more fully than I would if I didn't dare anything.

It's tempting to consider ourselves completely independent.  Tempting, but unrealistic and rather foolish.  We share this planet with many wonderful human beings (or spirits going through a human experience), and it's important that we keep in mind that we can enrich our lives in many great ways if we make ourselves into people who can make a difference for others when they need us--even though they might think they don't.

There's a great big world out there full of great people.  The kind of face and figure that we present to that world is completely up to us, and we can make a positive difference only if we're aware of what we want to be, and only if we take steps to be that person.

Questions to consider:

Do you make conscious decisions about the type of person you wish to be?

What kinds of actions would you need to take to become the person you most desire to be?

What character strengths would you like to see grow in yourself?For further thought:

To recognize your capacity to affect life is to know yourself
most intimately and deeply, to recognize your real value and
power, independent of any role that you may have been given
to play or expertise you may have acquired.

Rachel Naomi Remen

October 18

Today's quotation:

What can you do right now to begin to turn your
life around?  The very first thing is to start making
a list of things to be grateful for.  This shifts
your energy and starts to shift your thinking.

Joe Vitale

Today's Meditation:

It's easy to think of gratitude as a nice human trait, as something that we like to see other people express in their lives, and that most of us know we need to express more of in our lives.  But we don't often see gratitude as a force in our lives, as a source of positive energy that can literally be the catalyst for major changes not just in the ways that we see things, but also in the things that come our way on a day-to-day basis.

Gratitude is positive energy.  It's the conversion of latent energy in ourselves into something that can lift the spirits of other people, make them feel better and brighter, and change their own energy levels almost instantly.  That is, gratitude can be these things when it's expressed.  Gratitude unexpressed really doesn't do much for anyone else, though it can be very beneficial to us, ourselves.

And not all gratitude needs to be expressed to others.  I'm grateful for the fact that I'm able to use my body in many different ways, but that's not something that I need to share with others.  It is something, though, that brings me extra energy--positive energy--each time I consider this truth.  And my gratitude for the things I have actually helps to attract other things that I want, for my positive focus is a signal, a transmission tower, if you will, that emits positive energy into the world.  And as we all know from basic physics, like attracts like.

Gratitude is a beautiful thing.  But it also can be a very positive agent of change, if we only allow our gratitude to be an important part of who we are, constantly.

Questions to consider:

How might gratitude help you to change your life?

What does the positive energy of gratitude feel like?

Can we attract more things to be grateful for into our lives without feeling gratitude for what we have, first?

For further thought:

If it is a new thought to you that gratitude brings your whole mind into closer harmony with the creative energies of the Universe, consider it well, and you will see that it is true.

Wallace Wattles

October 17

Today's quotation:

An accurate definition of the self is impossible.  You are
more than you realize, more than you can define.  And
the more time you spend trying to nail down the definition,
the less time you spend living right now. . . Your past is
not your identity. . . You, living now, is your identity.

George Lawrence-Ell

Today's Meditation:

It's kind of funny how much time we spend trying to figure ourselves out.  Perhaps it's a result of existential angst--maybe we feel that if we can define ourselves, our mortality will be explained to us and we'll have answers to important questions before we actually die.  But many of the greatest thinkers of the world have realized that we go about creating who we are each day of our lives, through our thoughts, actions, and deeds.  We don't need to stop and take a snapshot of exactly who we are, for such a snapshot will be incomplete and unfulfilling.

We have to choose where we spend our energy, and it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to spend it trying to come up with something that necessarily will be inaccurate.  My identity is not something that can be written down or captured, and it's much more fun for me to be living my life fully and getting the most out of life instead of sitting in some "library" somewhere trying to figure out who I am.

I can see important images of who I am--reflections, if your will--in the things I do, the people I like and dislike, the things I own, the actions I take, the things I say.  And that should be enough.  These things won't provide me with a complete definition of my identity, but they most certainly can help me to see important parts of myself.  I don't need to waste time and energy on a futile task, especially when I consider that six months from now, any definition I come up with will be irrelevant and out of date.

Questions to consider:

Why do we sometimes get the urge to "define" ourselves?

What makes up your true identity?

How might we go about learning more about ourselves without trying to define ourselves completely?

For further thought:

How can you develop a self-concept linked to your untapped potential?  First, you can decide on the kind of life you would like to lead in ten or fifteen years.  This will give you a standard for making decisions about current activities and will reduce the inclination to compare yourself unfavorably to others.  Learn to ask, "How would I handle this situation were I the person I hope to become?"  And then take action in line with your vision.

Ari Kiev

Today's quotation:

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you
wanted, but getting what you have, which once you
have got it you may be smart enough to see is
what you would have wanted had you known.

Garrison Keillor

Today's Meditation:

There have been plenty of times when I've really wanted something--some thing, some relationship, some job.  And I've done everything I could to acquire it or make it happen.  Many times, I've failed to do so.  And as time goes on, I've started to see that that usually is a good thing, that what I get instead definitely is the best thing for me and for the other people in my life.

It can be lucky not to get what we want, for if we get what we think we want, there may be no space available in our lives for what we truly want.  I may have my heart set on a particular car, but if I get it I won't be able to get the car that's better and cheaper that I find a week later.  I may be interested in a certain job, but if I take it then I won't be able to say yes to the better job offer that comes along in a couple of months.

Life really does look out for us.  If we trust it, then we can let go of our wanting and needing, and we can allow life to treat us well and bring to us those things that are truly the best for us.  Very often our wants are influenced by others--friends, families, marketers, advertisers--and we often want things that we hadn't wanted until someone else brought them to our attention.  Once that happens, it can be very healthy for us to say, instead of "I'm going to get that at any cost," "If life knows that that's best for me, then it will be a part of my life when it's best for that to happen."

Look at your life and see the many wonderful things that are a part of it.  How many of those things did you actually strive for, and how many of them somehow found their ways into your life while you were striving for something else that you ended up not getting?  If we're smart enough, we can see which is better for us.

For further thought:

Life is good and is always trying to do us a good turn
if we will only allow it to do so.

Henry T. Hamblin

Today's quotation:

Take your life in your own hands, and what happens?
A terrible thing:  no one to blame.

Erica Jong

Today's Meditation:

I know many people who would get upset about today's quotation, especially if they were to take the time and make the effort to realize that it's applicable to them.  I had a neighbor once who constantly complained about what a rotten hand life had dealt him, and he made sure that I knew that none of it was his fault.  Everything that went wrong in his life had to do with his wife (who was going through severe medical/emotional problems), his kids, his job. . . you name it.

And while he was a man who definitely would have claimed that he was in control of his own life and destiny, his complaints made it very clear that he didn't truly feel that way.  His complaints gave him a way to make it seem that he was deserving of everyone's sympathy, and that others couldn't expect too much out of him because of how bad things were in his life.

I learned a lot from him, especially since he often used me as a sounding board.  I learned that no matter how bad things might seem to me, there are many others who have things much worse.  And I learned to recognize in my own complaining (which I like to think wasn't as common as his) the same thought patterns that turned me into a blameless victim of people and forces outside of myself.  And when I recognized them, I'd ask myself "Do I sound like What's-his-name?"  And the answer usually was an unflattering "Yes."

So I've tried to stop playing the blame game.  I've tried to take my life into my own hands.  I've studied on what that means, and I've asked people I admire how they do what they do.  And as I try not to blame, I've come to realize that 99.9% of the time, there's really no need to blame anyone at all--things are as they are, and even if they're somewhat negative, they probably are not anyone's fault.  And that realization frees me to live my life in a very calm, relaxed way.  And I like that.  My life is my responsibility--that doesn't mean I need to control it, but how I act in it is completely up to me.  And having my life in my own hands can even mean letting go of the need to control it.

For further thought:

All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault
you find with another, and regardless of how much
you blame him, it will not change you.

Wayne Dyer

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October 13

Today's quotation:

When people are free to do as they please,
they usually imitate each other. Originality
is deliberate and forced, and partakes of
the nature of a protest.

Eric Hoffer

Today's Meditation:

We all have the potential to be original and creative.  We all have truly unique visions and ideas--that's the very nature of who we are, completely unique and very creative.  True creativity, though, isn't seen all that often in our daily lives.  After all, most of our models of creativity aren't creative at all--songmakers, moviemakers, television and radio producers, almost all are making "products" based on what they think will sell.  And they decide what to make based on what is selling now, copying the same over-used formulas and ideas that others already have used successfully.

Being original also opens us up to criticism, especially when people don't understand where we're coming from.  And why should they understand, when they can't get inside of our minds or hearts to understand our personal creativity?  The trick for us obviously is not to take their lack of understanding personally, not to take it as an insult, when they criticize the results of our creativity.

Imitation may be the highest form of flattery, but to ourselves, it's an easy way out, a safe way to express ourselves in ways that could be more creative and fulfilling.  Creativity, though, takes work, first of all to depart from our learned tendency to imitate, and second of all to reach inside and find what truly wants to come out of ourselves in the form of expression.

What's inside of you?  How might you express yourself in ways that truly reflect your creativity and your love for your life and yourself?  What might you contribute to the world in a truly unique way if you were to trust your creativity fully?  You have the power to create rather than imitate, so just how can you use it and make things that you're proud of no matter what others might say?

Questions to consider:

Where does your strongest creativity come from?  How does it express itself?

Why do so many people choose to imitate rather than create?

Who determines whether you imitate or create?

For further thought:

I decided to start anew—to strip away what I had been taught, to accept as true my own thinking.  This was one of the best times of my life.  There was no one around to look at what I was doing, no one interested, no one to say anything about it one way or another.  I was alone and singularly free, working into my own, unknown—no one to satisfy but myself.  I began with charcoal and paper and decided not to use any color until it was impossible to do what I wanted to do in black and white.  I believe it was June before I needed blue.

Georgia O’Keefe

Today's quotation:

How do the geese know when to fly to the sun?  Who tells them
the seasons?  How do we, humans, know when it is time to
move on? As with the migrant birds, so surely with us, there is
a voice within, if only we would listen to it, that tells us
so certainly when to go forth into the unknown.

Elisabeth Kuebler-Ross

Today's Meditation:

That voice within.  That beautiful, magical presence inside us that lets us know almost everything that we need to know--that can help us to make the right decisions every time, that can help us to make the right choices and say the right things and avoid saying and doing the wrong things.  That wonderful voice that we ignore so often in our efforts to run our lives in the ways that we see fit.

"If only we would listen to it."  One of the greatest gifts that we have as human beings, and we tend to ignore it!  How could that be so?  In his story "To Build a Fire," Jack London tells us of a man who uses reason to try to survive in temperatures of 75 degrees below zero.  He's accompanied by a dog whose instinct tells him he shouldn't be out there.  The man who depends on reason dies, while the dog who trusts his instinct survives.  It's a beautiful lesson on the limits of reason and the powers of instinct, and it's a lesson that I try to pay attention to in my day-to-day life.

Many people pray, but few people listen for responses to their prayers.  Many people talk with friends, but not everyone listens when their friends talk.  Listening is a skill that must be practiced if we're going to get good at it, and listening to that voice that comes from inside us is a skill that few people value enough even to think of practicing.  But what kinds of benefits can it bring us to pay attention to it!

The voice tells us when it's time to venture forth and which directions to take.  If I heed and trust the voice, I'm taking advantage of a beautiful gift.  If I ignore it and don't trust it, then I'm squandering a great gift.  And what good does that do me or anyone else in my life? 

For further thought:

Trust the instinct to the end, though you can render no reason.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

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October 11

Today's quotation:

One's philosophy is not best expressed in words;
it is expressed in the choices one makes... and the
choices we make are ultimately our responsibility.

Eleanor Roosevelt

Today's Meditation:

I do like to think that I have a philosophy of life.  I'm not sure, though, that my actions fully reflect it, that the choices I make present to the world someone who is actually living his philosophy.  If there's congruency between my philosophy and the choices I make in life, then the world will see a person who is at peace, even when things seem to be going poorly.  If there's incongruence between my philosophy and my choices, though, then I'm probably not living up to my responsibility of making choices that reflect my life view.

I'm going to make choices today, and I hope that they'll be positive ones, choices that contribute to the peace and love and compassion in the world, even in my own small way.  I hope that my feeling that life is to be lived fully will be reflected in those choices, and that I don't make choices based on whatever happens to be easiest at the moment, or on whatever will benefit me the most if it will hurt other people.

My life is out there for all to see, and I can only hope that people see a person who makes good choices that benefit the greater good, and not just himself.  I have a responsibility to the world to be the best me I possibly can be, and to be genuinely and authentically me--and whether I am or not is definitely a result of the choices I make, today and every day.

If you see me live my life, I truly hope that you can get a very good idea of the philosophies that guide my life. 

Questions to consider:

How are your philosophies reflected in your choices?

Why do many people never bother to consider their philosophies on life and living?

How can your choices benefit others?

For further thought:

Know how to choose well.  Most of
life depends thereon.  It needs good
taste and correct judgment, for which
neither intellect nor study suffices.

Baltazar Gracian

October 10

Today's quotation:

I have had more trouble with myself
than with any other person I've met.

Dwight Moody

Today's Meditation:

It's certainly easy to relate to Dwight's statement--it seems that most of us have more trouble with ourselves than with anyone else.  We criticize ourselves, we get angry with ourselves, we make choices and decisions that hurt ourselves; in short, we often don't treat ourselves very well at all.  And through all this, we rarely focus on treating ourselves well by forgiving ourselves, having compassion with ourselves, understanding ourselves, or giving ourselves a break.

There's really no need for all of this, and it's a shame that so many of us treat ourselves in the ways that we do.  It's easy for us to say that everyone on the planet is worthy of our love and respect, but then turn around and treat ourselves with almost none of either.  It's easy for us to say that we're "looking out for number one," but that type of attitude tends to have more to do with material goods than with spiritual or emotional needs.

It's also important to keep in mind that when we have trouble with ourselves, we're virtually guaranteeing that we're going to have trouble with other people.  We can only give to others what we're willing to give ourselves, after all, and if we give ourselves troubles, we're setting ourselves up for problems with others.

If someone is kind and compassionate to me, then I almost never have trouble with that person.  If I'm kind and compassionate to myself, then how difficult it will be to have trouble with myself!  And I'm worth my own kindness and compassion.

Questions to consider:

What kinds of trouble do you have with yourself?

Do you often show yourself kindness and compassion?

In what ways can you diminish the troubles you might have with yourself?

For further thought:

You and I can profit by asking ourselves:  What do I see when I look through the lens of my attitude toward myself?  Am I more a critic than a friend?  Do I look beyond the surface blemishes to find the truly beautiful and unique person that I am?  Or do I play the destructive "comparison game"?  What verdict does the juror of my mind pass on me:  "good at heart" or "guilty on all counts"?

John Powell, S.J.

October 7

Today's quotation:

The world needs people like you to dream of something
great and then pursue it with all your heart.

Chris Widener

Today's Meditation:

So what will happen if you do this?  And why does the world "need" you to do it?  Quite simply, the world needs us to pursue things with passion because positive energy, the energy that comes from living with passion, is necessary for all of us to experience.  And only when you do this will you contribute something truly unique to you as an individual to the world.  And only when you do this will you be able to serve as a role model for other people who long to see someone who's going after their dreams and living a special life.

Things may be hard--they often are when we pursue our dreams.  There will be difficulties, but if you know you have to climb mountains and go through valleys in order to reach the destination of your dream, then those difficulties won't be at all daunting to you.

The world needs you to be you, and you can be you only when you're true to your personal dreams and desires.  Something great doesn't have to affect the entire world--it can be something simple but enduring and important.  And great is different for each person, too.

You know your dreams.  Only you know your dreams.  Find them, live them, love them, and pursue them.  Only when you do so will you be pursuing your authentic self.  There's no need to cast aside your present life--don't let that idea hold you back.  The great novel can be written in an hour a day for a year.  The new curriculum can be developed early in the morning before the day starts.  Your dreams are yours, and they are within your reach.  You have to stand up and reach for them, though.

Questions to consider:

What are some of your most important dreams?

Why do so many people find it difficult to pursue their dreams?

Who is keeping your from pursuing your dreams?

For further thought:

Your dream might change our planet.

Edward Lindaman

Today's quotation:

Your vision will become clear only when you
look into your heart.  Who looks outside, dreams.
Who looks inside, awakens.

Carl Jung

Today's Meditation:

It's a wonderful thing to dream, to have hopes and aspirations of things to come, things to be in the future.  But it's an even more marvelous thing to awaken, to recognize your true beauty, your true power, your true ability.  It's all inside of you already, waiting patiently for you to look inside yourself and discover it, use it, love it.

I always used to think that something else would cause me to be happy.  I'd get just the right job, I'd meet just the right person, I'd have tons of money.  But as I've grown and matured, I've learned that those were only just dreams--the situation may have turned out the way I wanted it to, but I wasn't any happier when it did.  That led me to believe that there was something wrong with the way I was looking at things, with the way I was hoping for something outside myself to do something that nothing outside of me ever can do.

My vision was clouded by my ideas that something else could have any sort of power over my life.  Of course it can't!  Only I have any sort of say over what I do, how I do it, or how I feel when it's done.  My vision becomes much more clear when I look inside myself and see myself for who I am, and trust myself fully and completely.

I like dreaming.  But dreaming implies a sleeping state, and in sleep there is no awareness.  I prefer to be aware, awake, alive.  When I am, my vision is truly clear and I can live my life fully and completely.

For further thought:

Our wholeness exists in us now.  Trapped though it may be, it can be called upon for guidance, direction, and most fundamentally, comfort.  It can be remembered.  Eventually we may come to live by it.

Rachel Naomi Remen

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Today's quotation:

I am still learning--how to take joy in all the people I am,
how to use all my selves in the service of what I believe,
how to accept when I fail and rejoice when I succeed.

Audre Lord

Today's Meditation:

"All the people I am."  How to take joy in that. . . .

It's astonishing sometimes to think of just how many different roles we have in life, and just how little we think of how important they are too us.  Our roles as husband, wife, son, daughter, brother, sister, co-worker, boss, friend, student, teacher, mentor--each calls us to be someone else, a completely different person.  Perhaps we carry similar motivation into separate roles, but for the most part we are different people in each role.

And that's something to celebrate!  Each role brings to it different things to learn, things that we can learn only in that given situation with those certain people.  Each role brings unique challenges and rewards and experiences that help our spirits to grow into the extraordinary beings that we were created to be.  And each role helps us to further define who we are, what we believe, and what we intend to give to the world.

Joy in who we are is a great thing to have--and joy in the many people that we are is even greater.  I feel joy as a husband and joy as a teacher, and I know that both roles are a true blessing in my life--and that they both give me great cause to rejoice.  And that's only two of the people who I am--think of how many other reasons for joy are built into the other people who I am!

For further thought:

I love having many roles to play--they keep me vital
and they keep me new.  I love the fact that I can be
a different person in different situations--in a completely
appropriate way.  And each time I'm able to help someone
else in a completely different role of mine, my heart grows,
my spirit grows, and my love of life grows.

unattributed

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October 2

Today's quotation:

They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.

Antonio Porchi

Today's Meditation:

How nice it is to have someone else traveling on the same road that we're on!  How nice it is to have company!  But how deceptive it is, too, to have other people tell us that we're on the wrong path in life simply because they'd like to have some company on the path that they're on!

We must all walk our own paths--but only if we want to find our own ways and live our own lives in the most authentic ways that we can.  Following someone else's path never will get us where we want and need to be, simply because other people have different callings, different needs, different strengths and weaknesses, and when we try to walk with them in their direction, we find that our own strengths aren't necessarily appropriate in the places where we find ourselves.

It's easy for others to criticize us and say that we're going in the wrong direction and doing the wrong types of things.  Usually when we're truly on our own paths, it's difficult for others to understand where we are or our need to be there.  It's up to us to develop the strength to resist the temptation to join others just because it's the easiest thing to do--after all, our journeys here on earth aren't necessarily about finding the easiest ways out of things.

If the path you are on is your own, then celebrate!  Love the path and love the journey, and don't allow anyone else to turn you from the path that you know you need to be on if you're to become the person you're meant to be while here on this great planet of ours.

Questions to consider:

Are you truly on your own path?

Why might others be interested in telling us that we're on the wrong path?

What can you do when others tell you that you're on the wrong path?

For further thought:

People take different roads seeking fulfillment
and happiness.  Just because they're not on
your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost.

H. Jackson Browne

Today's quotation:

Put yourself in a state of mind where you say to
yourself, "Here is an opportunity for me to celebrate
like never before, my own power, my own ability
to get myself to do whatever is necessary."

Anthony Robbins

Today's Meditation:

It's so easy to forget to celebrate ourselves.  After all, there are so many things that we do wrong, that we could do better, that we could do more effectively. . . . it's extremely easy to criticize ourselves and our lack of power in a world that seems to want us to feel powerless, but the truth of the matter is that we have lots of power, and we do have the ability to do whatever is necessary to get done whatever we need to.

But we do have to be in the right state of mind if we're going to see that power put to good use.  We do have to make the decision to give ourselves credit for having the power in the first place, and we do have to celebrate that power and our abilities.  That very celebration, those very feelings, can be what propel us into a new set of behaviors, a new way of being, a mindset that keeps us doing things that are important to us--and doing them successfully, all the time.

You do have plenty of power as a human being, as a child of God, as a living spirit here on this planet with millions of other living spirits.  But that power will lie latent unless and until you're willing to acknowledge it, accept it, and celebrate its presence in your life.

It's always our choice as to which state of mind we prefer to stay in.  Some of our states of mind limit us and keep us from achieving our full potential.  Other states of mind make celebration of our own power a natural part of who we are.

Today's quotation:

Self-confidence is so relaxing.  There is no strain or stress
when one is self-confident.  Our lack of self-confidence
comes from trying to be someone we aren't.

Anne Wilson Schaef

Today's Meditation:

Who are you?  Genuinely and sincerely, who are you?  And are you trying your best to be that person all the time, no matter where you are, whom you're with, or the situations in which you find yourself?  If you have true self-confidence, then you'll find that whoever you are, that's enough for you, and whatever you're doing, that's enough for you as long as it truly reflects who you are.

A strong self-confidence is one of the most important things we can develop if we want to get the most out of this life we're in.  And we lose our self-confidence when we put ourselves in situations in which we don't really belong--when we're trying to be something we aren't.  Books are full of stories of people who spent years pursuing jobs they weren't qualified for or that weren't fulfilling, or who wasted much of their lives doing things more to impress others than to use their own true skills and abilities.

And those stories can teach us something very important about ourselves and our lives--that when we're true to who we are, we can't lose our self-confidence because we'll be doing what we were called to do, doing things that we know we can do well.  And when we're doing that, our lives become easier and more relaxed, for we don't have to worry so much about mistakes and failures--we'll still have both, of course, but in such a place in our lives we'll be able to deal with them quickly and easily.

The greatest gift I can give to the world is to be myself.  Anything else that I can give already has been given.  And when I focus on being myself my life becomes easier, and I can be myself even better.  What a great endless circle that becomes!

For further thought:

Whatever you are by nature, keep to it; never desert your own line of talent.  Be what nature intended you for, and you will succeed; be anything else and you will be ten thousand times worse than nothing.

Sydney Smith

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Today's quotation:

Throughout the years of your life you will face
many challenges; remember that you can climb
the highest mountain, drive through the roughest storm, soar across the bluest sky, or even sail across the roughest waters. It is only destined
by your attitude where you will end up in life.
The most important thing is don't let yourself
get lost in the crowd.

Angela Duvall

Today's Meditation:

How many times have we heard about our attitudes, and how we should "improve" them if we're going to get all that we can out of life, if we want to be happy?  I'm not sure if the question at hand is really about improvement, though--I feel that I'm deciding which attitude to bring to which situation each day of my life, and that within me are all the positive attitudes that I need to make something special of my life--as long as I choose to bring the positive attitudes to each situation in which I need them.

When I see something beautiful that I desire, then I have the choice to say to myself, "I'll never be able to achieve or attain that."  Or I can say, "Wow--that's what I want to do or have!  Now I just need to do the things I need to do to make it a reality."  The very attitude will allow me to open doors and windows that can allow me to get closer to my dreams.  Imagine that someone has just given you a beautiful new house and told you it's all yours.  You walk up to the front door and try it, but it's locked, so you sigh miserably, turn around, and walk away.  You'll never know that the back door is open, and also a few windows that you can get through.  Your attitude has defeated you, not the locked door or the house.

The "crowd" tends to see life in terms of limitations.  The people who surround us like to tell us what's not possible to do.  "You can't get in that house," they say, "because the door's locked."  And if I get lost in how they see the world, then they're right--I can't get into that house because I see the world through the lenses of their limitations.

But if I have the attitude that I'll explore possibility and potential rather than limitations and obstacles, then I will get into the house, and I will enjoy all it has to offer.

For further thought:

A great attitude does much more than turn on the lights in our worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before the change.

Earl Nightingale

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September 28

Today's quotation:

Practice rather than preach.  Make of your life an affirmation, defined by your ideals, not the negation of others.  Dare to
the level of your capability then go beyond to a higher level.

Alexander Haig

Today's Meditation:

There are many people in the world who are much more comfortable preaching than they are practicing.  We don't have to be like that, though, and as long as we're aware of the need to maintain consistency between our words and our actions, we have a very good chance of making our life an affirmation--of our values, of our beliefs, of our desire to help our fellow human beings in the ways we best can do so.

When we practice without preaching to others, people can sense our authenticity.  They know that we're being ourselves and not expecting them to live up to some artificial expectations that we've built up of them, and they can relax around us, be comfortable with us, learn from us.  When we move our own lives and actions to a higher level, then we don't even need to preach to others--our very lives will be all the message that we want or need to send to others.

Our lives become what we make them.  They don't just happen.  We always have a choice:  do we make them affirmations of our higher selves, the selves that love and dare and share and feel compassion with others, or do we make them affirmations of our fears, our frustrations, our critical sides that see the faults in others?  Do we make ourselves "feel better" by negating and cutting down others, or do we simply build ourselves up to a point at which we never need to cut down a single person for any reason at all?

Questions to consider:

How can you go about making your life an affirmation today?

What does it mean to define our lives by our ideals rather than by the negation of others?

How can you go beyond the level of your capability?

For further thought:

Ideals are like stars; you will not succeed in touching
them with your hands.  But like seafarers on the
desert waters, you choose them as your guides,
and following them you will reach your destiny.

Carl Schurz

September 27

Today's quotation:

People are not intended to see through the eyes of another, hear through another's ears nor comprehend with another's brain.  Each human creature has individual endowment, power and responsibility in the creative plan of God.

Abdu'l-Baha

Today's Meditation:

It's important to keep things like this in mind when we try to make others "see things our way."  Whenever we try to convince someone else that we see things in the only truly "right" way, we reduce the world to a very limited, very narrow place indeed.

The way I see the world is unique to me, and I value my perspective for exactly what it is:  a limited perspective on an unlimited world.  But if I'm to be fair in life, then I must value the perspectives of others, too, as being just as valid as my own.  Other people have grown with different experiences and different input into their lives, and it's not up to me to impose my way of seeing things upon others.  Once I do so, I'm showing a lack of respect for another person's uniqueness and individuality.

I am who I am, and if I respect that fully than it's easier for me to respect the fact that other people are who they are, and that it's not important for me to try to get them to see the world through my eyes, to understand things the way I understand them.  Rather, if I can try to understand the way they see things, I can learn much more about life, living, and this wonderful world of ours by seeing everything in a new light, from a new perspective.

Questions to consider:

Why do so many people feel that they're "teaching" when they're actually trying to get others to see things the way they see them?

How can we learn most effectively by allowing others to explain to us their ways of seeing things?

How can we show respect for others' ways of seeing life?

For further thought:

Be yourself.  Above all, let who you are, what you are,
what you believe, shine through every sentence
you write, every piece you finish.

John Jakes

September 26

Today's quotation:

Start doing the things you think should be done, and start being what you think society should become.  Do you believe in free speech?  Then speak freely.  Do you love the truth?  Then tell it.  Do you believe in an open society?  Then act in the open.  Do you believe in a decent and humane society?  Then behave decently and humanely.

Adam Michnik

Today's Meditation:

Who am I?  Can people tell who I am and what I believe simply by observing me?  Do my ideals and values shine through in my actions?  Am I behaving in a way that's consistent with what's truly important to me in life?

It's easy enough to hold our beliefs about what important without actually acting in ways that are consistent with those beliefs.  It's even easy for us to expect others to live up to our expectations and values without living up to them ourselves.  But when we do that, we certainly aren't contributing a valuable and consistent role model to our society.  We aren't going to give to the world a model of what we find to be most important in our dealings with the world.

Whether we want to believe it or not, there are many people looking to us for modeling, looking to us to see how they should act in society.  And if they see us not telling the truth, they'll find it much easier not to tell the truth themselves.  If they hear us talk about the importance of helping others but never witness us helping anyone else, then what is the true message that we're sending to them?

The beauty of making our actions match our beliefs is that when enough of us start doing so, then our societies as a whole will begin to resemble those actions.  When more people start behaving decently and humanely, then the societies in which we live will become more decent and more humane.  We do have the ability to affect the world, little by little, but our contribution will be null and void if we act in ways that are inconsistent with our beliefs.

Questions to consider:

Will all of your actions today reflect your most valued beliefs?

How many people do you know who live their lives in ways they think that society should be?

What effects do we have on others when our actions aren't consistent with our beliefs?

For further thought:

Your thoughts should agree with your words, and the words
should agree with your actions.  In this world people think
one thing, say another thing, and do something else.
This is horrible.  This is crookedness.

Sivananda

Today's quotation:

The world is blessed most by people who do things,
not by those who merely talk about them.

James Oliver

Today's Meditation:

The blessings in our lives do not come from those people who think about doing things but never act.  They do not come from the dreamers who are more than willing to tell us about their dreams and ambitions, but who never lift a finger to make those dreams into reality.

No, the blessings in our lives come from those people who actually have made the effort to fulfill needs of others, who have faced the risks and challenges involved in making their dreams and ideas become real-life things that we all can benefit from.

There's a lot of value in talking about our dreams and ambitions.  Doing so can help us to clarify our dreams and intentions, and we can develop those dreams as we talk about them, turning the dreams into plans.  But there comes a point at which talk is no longer beneficial, and in fact may become harmful.  The longer we delay in working towards fulfilling our dreams and ambitions, the less likely we are to start the process that's necessary to come up with what we want to.

We can be great blessings to the world not by talking about encouraging others, but by actually doing so.  We can be blessings by creating things that will help others, not by talking about creating them.  We are blessings to the world simply by our being here, but we can make our being here truly beneficial to others by doing something to make their lives better, not by talking about making their lives better.

For further thought:

Words are plentiful,
but deeds are precious.

Lech Walesa

Today's quotation:

There were many times in my life, until I was left alone, that I wished for solitude.  I now find that I love solitude.  I never had the blessed gift of being alone until the last of my loved ones was wrested from me.  Now I can go sometimes for days and days without seeing anyone. . . . Solitude--walking alone, doing things alone--is the most blessed thing in the world.  The mind relaxes and thoughts begin to flow and I think I am beginning to find myself a little bit.

Helen Hayes

Today's Meditation:

I used to hate being alone.  Somehow I saw the fact that I was alone as a failure, as a problem in my life.  I felt that it was an indicator of the many imagined shortcomings that I had convinced myself that I had.  These days, though, I've come to appreciate solitude as one of the most important elements of my life, for my times of solitude also are my times of reflection and introspection, times when I can seriously consider my life and my place in this world of ours.

Solitude allows us to slow down, to take life at a less frantic pace, to appreciate the peace and quiet that's available to all of us when we look for it.  Solitude also allows us to think our own thoughts rather than constantly thinking thoughts that are reactions to other people's thoughts or words or actions.  It allows us to dig more deeply into topics that interest us, books that fascinate us, ideas that intrigue us.  Solitude allows us to shift our focus to things that are important to us as spiritual beings rather than focusing on whatever it is that the group is focusing on at the moment.

A walk alone can be one of the most important elements of any given day.  An hour alone at home can help us to restore our energy and reinvigorate ourselves.  If we accept solitude for what it is, it can be the most relaxing and refreshing part of our everyday lives.

If we equate the term solitude with "loneliness," though, we can sabotage any chance we have of getting benefit from our alone time.  Our perspective towards solitude is what determines whether it's a part of our lives that contributes to who we are--and what we're able to give to others--or a part that brings us down, that we long to escape from whenever it visits.

For further thought:

When we cannot bear to be alone, it means we do
not properly value the only companion we will
have from birth to death--ourselves.

Eda LeShan

September 19

Today's quotation:

I will not follow where the path may lead, but I will go
where there is no path, and I will leave a trail.

Muriel Strade

Today's Meditation:

It can be terrifying to leave the well-worn path.  It can fill us with fear of the unknown and worry for the future.  After all, the path may look attractive right now, but how does it look up around the next bend?  Maybe there it runs through a swamp full of dangerous snakes and biting insects, or runs along the edge of a 1000-foot precipice.  And if it does that, it won't be such a nice road, will it?

But fear of what may happen in the future is no reason to avoid blazing our own path in life, especially when we keep in mind that we create our own paths in life.  We don't just blaze trails--we actually create our own futures by our actions and thoughts of today.  If we create a positive, loving reality today, then guess what the path we're blazing will look like as we continue down it?

The paths that are already created may be worn smooth and comfortable, not causing us undue stress or strain, but they are also much less rewarding than those we blaze on our own (and isn't "blaze" a great word for creating a path?  It brings to mind the flames of passion as we blaze our trail!).  Should we continue to go only those places where others have gone before us, or should we try to make more of our lives, exploring regions that will force us to use our resources more creatively and uniquely than we'd be able to do on the worn paths?

If we can do this, we can leave behind us a new path that someone else can take until they, too, are willing and able to step off onto their own path in life.

Questions to consider:

Are you on your own unique path, or a well-worn path?

How can we move from a well-worn path to our own unique one?

How do we decide which way to go when no path stretches before us?

For further thought:

Whenever two ways lie before us, one of which is easy and the other hard, one of which requires no exertion while the other calls for resolution and endurance, happy are those who choose the mountain path and scorn the thought of resting in the valley.  These are the men and women who are destined in the end to conquer and succeed.

Anonymous

September 17

Today's quotation:

If we wait to foil a bank robbery or rescue someone tied on the railroad tracks we will never be a hero.  We probably won't even come across a cat stuck in a tree.  As long as we sit at the bus stop waiting for our great moment we will miss our real chance at the heroic:  the infinite number of tiny daily acts inspired by the great.  Our actions may seem insignificant, but their results will grow and multiply.

unattributed

Today's Meditation:

Our modern media and entertainment industries continue to barrage us with their ideas of what "heroic" means:  killing bad guys and saving people from terrorists; defusing bombs and blowing up buildings or saving someone from ferocious beasts or psychotic murderers.  The writers of these works are trying to do only one thing:  make money by exploiting our desire to live vicariously through actors in situations that none of us probably will ever see.  And most of us buy into this idea of heroism and realized that we never will be a "hero" as people in Hollywood or Madison Avenue see heroes.

I don't have any superpowers and I don't have a license to carry a concealed firearm, so does that mean that I never can be a hero?  Absolutely not.  It's up to us to define "heroism" for ourselves, and it's up to us to become heroes on our own terms.  We can be heroic in our imaginations, but that type of heroism doesn't help the people we meet in our day-to-day lives.  We can be heroic in small, almost insignificant ways, too--giving to others and helping others to be happy or fulfilled in their lives.  Our tiny acts of heroism won't make someone happy, but perhaps they can relieve some of the stress or worry in another person's life so that the person can find happiness more easily.

In almost half a century on this planet, I've never seen someone else raise a gun at another person or become involved in a high-speed chase in a major metropolitan area in order to capture bank robbers.  But I have seen many people practice heroism on their own small scale, and I know that I have a richer life for what's been given to me personally on a small scale than for what some "hero" has done to save humanity on a great scale.

Just because I can't save the world doesn't mean that I can't be a hero!

Questions to consider:

In what ways are you (or could you be) heroic?

Why do so many people use the term "hero" only for someone who is "heroic" in violent ways?

Do we necessarily have to risk our lives in order to be a hero?

For further thought:

A hero is someone who understands the responsibility
that comes with his or her freedom.

Bob Dylan

Today's quotation:

Most of the important things in the world have been
achieved by people who have kept on trying
when there seemed to be no hope at all.

Dale Carnegie

Today's Meditation:

One of the most important things that I've learned in life is that there's always hope.  As Dale says here, the key is to recognize that there only "seems" to be no hope at all.  There is hope, and when we persevere we may take ourselves to the very limits of our ability to see and feel hope, but it's at those very limits that our growth and maturation take place.

It's very easy to talk ourselves into believing that perseverance won't help us out a bit, but that simply is not true.  When we keep on trying we're bound to reach our goals, even if we do reach them much later than we thought or hoped we would.  It's not a question of life rewarding perseverance, for life is impartial to us as individuals, but a question of perseverance allowing us to reach results that seem to be out of our reach.

"The important things in the world" don't have to be earth-shattering discoveries or inventions.  They can be simple things that help your family or neighbors to feel better about themselves, programs that can provide needed meals to people in your community, ideas that can raise money for a needy charity in your town.  But they rarely are achieved through quick acts or spur-of-the-moment ideas.  In order to bring them to fruition, we have to commit ourselves to a course of action, one that will take more time than we might imagine at first.

Persistence is simply a willingness to keep working towards a goal despite a seeming lack of results.  And persistence is one of the most important elements of a life of contribution--it's our decision to persist, and that decision is all that stands between our success and our giving up hope.  But hope never gives up on us, so let's not give up on hope.

For further thought:

When you put your hand to the plow,
you can't put it down until you get to the end of the row.

Alice Paul

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Today's quotation:

Risk more than others think is safe.  Care more than others think is wise.  Dream more than others think is practical.  Expect more than others think is possible.

Cadet maxim, West Point, New York

Today's Meditation:

Other people want you to be safe because they care for you.  Some other people don't want you to take risks because you may end up making them look bad when you succeed.  Some people don't care too much because they're afraid they may be hurt if they do so.  Many people have low expectations of just about everything because they think they won't face as much disappointment if they look at life that way.

Well, here's some important news:  we don't have to be like any of them.  We can define life on our own terms, and we can look at other people as examples of how we want or don't want to live our lives.  If someone who has low expectations rarely seems to be happy, then guess what?  We can use that person as an example and raise our expectations and make our lives reach levels that person never can dream of.

I hope that I never settle for emulating others.  I hope that I'm able to listen to my heart and spirit and define my life as I see most fit for me as a unique individual, not as a follower of others.  Yes, I can take advice and yes, I can learn from other people's experiences, but what I make of all that is up to me, and the results of what I make will be truly unique in the world--if I create something truly unique.

We'll always find ourselves reaching new heights and stretching our limits if we keep the words "more than others" in mind.  Sadly, we're surrounded by people who settle for less, who thrive in mediocrity, who do their best to do their least.  But we don't have to be like them--we can live our lives more fully than others.

For further thought:

Every day, people settle for less than they deserve.
They are only partially living or at best living a partial life.
Every human being has the potential for greatness.

Bo Bennett

Today's quotation:

If we learn once again to listen to the gentle voice within, we will hear it counseling us many times a day to simplify our lives.  When the voices of the world propose the multiple complexities of modern living, the gentle voices within will whisper:  Why complicate your life?

Matthew Kelly

Today's Meditation:

The world around us doesn't necessarily want us to discover the joy and peace that we can find in simplicity.  After all, once we simplify our lives, we'll need fewer things, we'll buy fewer things, and people who are selling things will make less money from our consumerism.  So why would they want us to simplify, even if doing so can make us much happier and healthier?

We can simplify in many ways:  smaller living spaces, fewer possessions, fewer commitments, less time working and hurrying about, fewer credit cards, less expensive cars and homes and clothing--you name it, and there's usually a way (or two) that we can simplify almost any aspect of our lives.  And every step we take to simplify, we lose one more thing to worry about.  Cut up a credit card and pay off the bill and there's one less payment every month.  Get rid of the second and third TV's in the house, and there's less to clean, less chance of them breaking down and needing replacement, and smaller electric bills each month.

Nobody can tell us just what areas in our own lives are ripe for simplifying, unless we give them a lot of insight into our lives and ourselves and ask for advice.  Most simplifying will come from inside, and if we listen to that gentle voice that Matthew tells us about, we can find many areas in which we can make our lives simpler, more peaceful, and more satisfying.

Why complicate your life?  Perhaps the better question is, why have we complicated our lives so much already?  And how can we scale back to get rid of so many of the complications that we've brought on ourselves?

For further thought:

Do you know the more I look into life, the more things it seems to me I can successfully lack--and continue to grow happier.  How many kinds of food I do not need, or cooks to cook them, how much curious clothing or tailors to make it, how many books I have never read, and pictures that are not worthwhile!  The farther I run, the more I feel like casting aside all such impediments--lest I fail to arrive at the far goal of my endeavor.

David Grayson

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Today's quotation:

We have all been placed on this earth to discover
our own path, and we will never be happy
if we live someone else's idea of life.

James Van Praagh

Today's Meditation:

This is possibly the most important warning that we can receive, as long as we pay attention to it.  Are we truly being our authentic selves, searching out our own roads for our own journeys, or are we living our lives based on what we think other people expect from us and of us?

What do other people expect of us?  Some things are very helpful to our communities, such as following laws and cooperating with other people.  Other things, though, such as conforming to stereotypes and artificial social expectations, can be truly harmful to us as we attempt to forge and define our own identities, as we attempt to find our own, truly unique roads through life.

Robert Frost's words "I took the road less traveled by/and that has made all the difference," have been used often to illustrate the idea that James is talking about above.  Frost didn't say that it made his life easy or that there were no difficulties on the road he took, but he does imply that he was able to live his own idea of life rather than the idea that other people might have had in mind for him.

It's important to keep in mind that the roads that are traveled constantly are devoid of life.  The soil gets trampled down so tightly that nothing can grow there, so our journeys on those roads aren't nearly as rich as they would be on roads that we find for ourselves.  Our purpose on this planet is not to play follow-the-leader or to live up to other people's expectations.  Our purpose here is to become the best version of ourselves that we possibly can (to borrow a term from Matthew Kelly).

For further thought:

Choose always the way that seems the best, 
however rough it may be; 
custom will soon render it easy and agreeable.

Pythagoras

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Today's quotation:

If I were asked to give what I consider the most useful bit
of advice for all humanity it would be this:  Expect trouble
as an inevitable part of life and when it comes, hold your
head high, look it squarely in the eye and say, "I will
be bigger than you.  You cannot defeat me."

Ann Landers

Today's Meditation:

I think Ann's advice is great, but I believe I would take it even a bit further:  I would say that when trouble comes, don't even see it as something that's trying to defeat you.  Trouble isn't in our lives in order to try to make us miserable or to ruin our lives.  Trouble is an inevitable part of life that helps us to grow and develop our strengths as we deal with it.

A trouble-free existence would be incredibly boring, if you think about it.  We'd have no need to use our problem-solving skills, and much of our intellect would lie unused somewhere deep inside us.  Without trouble, we'd never learn how to overcome obstacles, and some of the most important inventions ever created never would have come to be without difficulties to face.

While many troubles aren't the best thing for us, it's important that we keep in mind just how good they can be for us.  We needn't embrace troubles as we would old friends, but we can look more closely at it to try to figure out just what lessons it has in store for us.  When we see our troubles as challenges that can help us to grow, they become opportunities, and that subtle shift in perspective can help us to deal effectively with virtually anything that happens to us in life.

Troubles will come.  Some of them will be more drastic than others.  But troubles are bound to become worse if we see them as something that's here to hurt us or to test us; they can be valuable friends if we can but learn to see the value that they're bringing to our lives.

For further thought:

Troubles are often the tools by which
God fashions us for better things.

Henry Ward Beecher

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Today's quotation:

Being gentle means forgiving yourself when you mess up.
We should learn from our mistakes, but we shouldn't beat
the tar out of ourselves over them.  The past is just that,
past.  Learn what went wrong and why.  Make amends
if you need to.  Then drop it and move on.

Sean Covey

Today's Meditation:

There's no one more deserving of our compassion and gentleness than ourselves.  There's no one more deserving of our forgiveness than ourselves.  Usually, though, there's no one who receives less of any of these things than ourselves.

It's hard sometimes to be kind to ourselves when we have artificially high expectations of ourselves.  Somehow we are more willing to forgive others for their mistakes than we are to forgive ourselves, and this tendency often has pretty drastic effects on ourselves.

One rule of thumb that I use is pretty simple:  what would I say to someone else who just made the same mistake that I did?  And what would I say to someone who was even more vulnerable due to a particular emotional or mental state?  And then I treat myself with the same kindness and compassion I would show this other person.  Being hard on myself serves absolutely no purpose other than to keep me trapped in the past due to a lack of forgiveness, and I don't want to ruin tomorrow because I'm so caught up with what I did yesterday.

I want to learn in life, and I want that learning to help me to become a stronger, more compassionate person tomorrow.  If I'm so busy being mad at myself for yesterday's mistake, though, how the heck can I be more loving and compassionate with others?  The way I treat others definitely is affected by the way I treat myself.

For further thought:

Often, we are harder on ourselves than others are.  If we cannot
forgive ourselves, how can we forgive other people?  Everyone's lesson is to forgive ourselves for our mistakes, even those things we feel ashamed about, and learn to accept ourselves for who we are, knowing that we can always gently work on making improvements.  For me, the true experience of inner peace began only once I was able to forgive those around me, my parents, and myself.

Patrick Wanis

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Today's quotation:

That which we persist in doing becomes easier for
us to do.  Not that the nature of the thing is
changed, but that our power to do is increased.

Marcus Porcius Cato

Today's Meditation:

I'll never know what kinds of things I might have become good at if I had simply persisted in trying them.  But life is about choices, and I've made the choice many times to give something up in favor of something else.  Those things that I have kept at invariably become much easier for me simply due to persistence--almost anyone can run five miles if they persist in running half a mile when they start, and then persist in adding to that distance at regular intervals.

As we run more, our bodies get used to the act of running.  Our hearts pump blood more strongly and more efficiently, and our lungs are able to distribute oxygen better.  Our power to run increases, and after a month or so, a five-mile run is easier for us than that first half-mile run was.

Unfortunately, though, most people feel the discomfort of that first run or two, and they quit before they ever give themselves the power to accomplish more; they quit before their power increases.

Writers grow by writing, runners grow through running, and salespeople grow from selling.  The more we do something, the better we get at it and the easier it becomes for us.  That temptation to give up is simply an aversion to the discomfort of the beginner--we wish to avoid the doubts and worries that something may not work out for us, and we think that life's much easier if we avoid the risk of failing.  But that "easier" can be seen also as "much less rich," so we have to be careful whenever we decide not to persist in our efforts, lest we rob ourselves of the opportunity of increasing our power to do things that we truly want to do.

For further thought:

Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence.
Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful
people with talent.  Genius will not; unrewarded genius is
almost a proverb.  Education will not; the world is filled
with educated derelicts.
Perseverance and determination alone are omnipotent.

Calvin Coolidge

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Me

Today's quotation:

We have no choice of what color we're born or
who our parents are or whether we're rich or poor.
What we do have is some choice over what
we make of our lives once we're here.

Mildred Taylor

Today's Meditation:

This is a refreshing perspective, a great departure from much of the "victim" talk that we hear so often in life.  Many people like to think that everything in their life is a result of forces that have "conspired" against them.  They've been born to a certain family, so they'll never be wealthy.  They've been born a certain race or gender or personality type, so "society" will never let them advance in the directions in which they wish to advance.

Historically speaking, of course, such limitations have been more likely in many people's lives.  There are certain careers that women could not aspire to three hundred years ago; two hundred years ago in America, an African-American man or woman could not aspire to do many things.  But one of the most important tricks in life is to recognize and accept certain limitations and then find your life's directions with those limitations in mind.  I would love to be a singer, but my voice isn't very good and I don't have the coordination to play instruments well; I've found other things to do that are just as fulfilling to me, though, and I don't worry about not being a singer.

This world is full of opportunity.  Sometimes opportunity requires us to make sacrifices or to change places where we live; sometimes opportunity can be intimidating and keep us from seeking it out because it involves a certain amount of risk.

But if we do make the decision to avoid the risk, it's also important to keep in mind that in avoiding the risk, it's our choice to neglect the opportunity that is there behind the risk.  It's not because of our race or gender or religion, but because of a decision that we've made.  Let's not make victims of ourselves--we may not take every risk that comes along, but that's not life's choice for us--it's our choice for ourselves.

What choices are you facing in the near future?  What will those choices mean for you and your loved ones?

How can we tell which choices will be good for us?

September 1

Today's quotation:

One of the things that my parents have taught me is never
listen to other people's expectations.  You should live your
own life and live up to your own expectations,
and those are the only things I really care about.

Tiger Woods

Today's Meditation:

It's nice to see that sometimes, the advice of parents is not only heard, but heeded.  In this case, Tiger's parents passed on a very wise principle to their son, and he internalized it, helping himself to be a much stronger and happier person.  For there's no doubt that trying to please other people with all that we do is a way to make ourselves miserable, while defining and trying to reach our own expectations is a very positive and productive way to go through life.

Nobody knows the life you're living, and nobody else knows what your dreams and goals and abilities are.  So realistically speaking, how can anyone else devise a set of expectations that match your unique self?  Other people's expectations are artificial at best, destructive at worst, and it's up to us to be realistic as we decide whose expectations we truly should follow.

Most expectations have their origins in history, in the ways that other people have done things.  Somehow we develop expectations that the people in the present and in the future will continue to do things in the same ways, whether those ways make sense or not.  The coat and tie provide a beautiful example--no one works any better because of the particular clothes they're wearing, but because people in certain positions are expected to wear a tie, they do so.  It doesn't matter that most of the people who visit a bank don't care one way or another if the banker's in a tie or a t-shirt, as long as he or she is professional and competent.  As long as two or three people might complain because their expectations of a banker being in a tie aren't met, then others expect the same thing of the banker.

Live up to your own expectations.  Have your own expectations, and make sure they're uniquely yours.  Know the situations in which you may be providing a service to others by meeting their expectations, but be sure you know why you do so.  Your life is yours to live, and it's important that you live it on your terms.

Questions to consider:

How often in your life do you find yourself trying to live up to other people's expectations?

How do we develop expectations that we expect others to follow?

Are there situations in which expectations of others are a positive thing?

For further thought:

To free us from the expectations of others, to give us back to ourselves--there lies the great, singular power of self-respect.

Joan Didion

August 31

Today's quotation:

Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive
yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward
ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others.

Wilferd Arlan Peterson

Today's Meditation:

I knew someone once who was really down on himself all the time.  He constantly criticized himself and his actions, and I don't remember ever hearing him say something good about himself.  He always used to wonder why people didn't want to be around him, though to me it was pretty clear--he treated other people the same ways he treated himself.  He criticized them and cut them down, had great expectations of them and became very disappointed with them if they didn't meet his expectations.  His kids didn't like to share anything with him, and they avoided him all they could (which wasn't easy since they all lived in the same house).

He lived in double misery--misery because he always hurt himself through his attitude towards himself, and misery because other people avoided him because they knew how he would act towards them.  And the latter fact made the former fact even worse--he treated himself worse because of the way that others avoided him.

This man was not gentle with himself.  He couldn't love or forgive himself, or at least he chose not to do either.  And the way he felt about himself was projected on other people in the way he expected others to treat him--and not surprisingly almost everyone lived down to his low expectations.

Misery often is a chosen condition--it's a result of decisions that we make.  It's the effect of certain causes.  How others treat us is usually a result of how we treat them, and how we treat them usually is a reflection of how we treat ourselves.  If we want others to treat us well, then we must treat ourselves well, first.  After all, we deserve good treatment--and we need it if we're going to make a difference in this world of ours.

Questions to consider:

What's your attitude towards yourself?

Why is it that others tend to treat us as we treat ourselves?

What positive things can you attract to yourself by treating yourself well?

For further thought:

It's easy to see and notice what we like in other people.  Sometimes,
it's not as easy to see the attributes and beauty in ourselves.
It's good to see the beauty in others.  But sometimes, take a
moment and get excited when you notice what's
beautiful in yourself, too.

Melody Beattie

August 30

Today's quotation:

A lot of people are waiting for Martin Luther King or
Mohandas Gandhi to come back -- but they are gone.
We are it.  It is up to us.  It is up to you.

Marian Wright Edelman

Today's Meditation:

There have been many human beings who have been able to bring hope to others.  They've lived their lives trying to right wrongs and bring justice to the world, and then they've passed on.  And when they do pass on, their passing leaves us in a kind of paralysis, a state in which we're sort of frozen, waiting for someone else to come along and thaw us.

But there are billions of potential Gandhi's on this planet at this very moment.  There are billions of potential King's and Luther's and Jesus' and Buddha's all about us, all the time.  And you are one of them.  You have the potential to increase the amount of love and peace and justice in this world, just as the "great" people have done in their times.  The only thing it takes to unlock that potential is the decision to do so.  It takes your commitment and your willingness to make some sacrifices for the good of others.  And therein lies much of the problem--not many of us are willing to make the necessary sacrifices.

This life is very short, and we have many choices to make while we're here.  If our choice is to help others truly and deeply, then it will take time, effort, and resources to do so.  Sometimes it will mean giving up the things that make us comfortable, at least for a time.  Sometimes it will mean going without something that you've wanted for a very long time.  Sometimes it will mean putting yourself into awkward or frightening situations.

But if not us, then who?

The difference that we make may not be on the scale of Gandhi's works, but it will be a difference nonetheless.  And it will be worth any sacrifice that we make, if we enter into it with no expectation of return and with a willingness to let go of the results.

Questions to consider:

What kinds of sacrifices do you regularly make in order to help others?

What do you consider to be the greatest contributions of people like Gandhi and King, Jr.?

What can you do today to help others?For further thought:

Every act has its effect.  To do nothing is an act that stems from feelings of hopelessness and despair.  Please remember, no matter how dark the future looks, you can make a difference.  When you live the true life you were sent here to live, the difference you make will enhance life rather than destroy it.  Do not spend time worrying how big a difference you make.  Anything that enhances a life makes a difference; helping one individual recover from a broken heart; easing one person's pain; helping one ugly duckling discover his or her beauty.  Keep working as long as you live, and live as long as you can, and when you finish your marathon they will hang a medal around your neck that says, "You Make a Difference."

Bernie Siegel