Everyone has them....sometimes they're "good" and sometimes they're "bad," but really they're just what they are.  Feelings aren't facts...that's something I try to remember...but they affect me and all of us in so many ways.  When a disability is involved, sometimes it can be very hard to deal with the feelings that surface, and people's reactions to us.  It has been one of the most difficult issues to me about having this disability I have.  Does anyone else have any comments on this?

For instance, this morning, I was on the phone with a very good friend.  She was talking about someone else but compared them to me in an unfavorable way.  The note she was making involved a cleanliness issue.  She was taking a moment in time a few years ago when my disability was flaring real bad and my house was a particular mess and using that moment to say something about the type of person I am.  I didn't like the way that I felt over that and so I addressed it with her.  I need to do that more often...directly address it, I think.  My pattern has been to just let it go by and take things people say too much to heart.  Then their misconception builds as does my resentment, if I don't say anything, and also I feel worse about me. 

Anyways, I think having a disability requires a lot of emotional maturity, and sometimes I wonder if I'm lacking in that!  I don't think it's so much that I'm lacking in that (I need to lighten up a little on me!)...but rather I think it's the isolation that sometimes can occur when people have never been in the same boat.  That's why groups like this are important.  Everyone needs friends with whom they can relate on issues as significant as disability is. 

Something else for me in particular is that with brain injury the emotions are often directly affected, and there is nervous system involvement, as well.  This is definitely an issue for me with my extended family and many of my long-term friends.  Since my disability is invisible, they think it's just my personality that cries under excessive stress or yells when I'm pushed too far.  Sure, my personality does enter into the picture, but my emotions are exacerbated by stress more than most people's are due to the brain injuries I've had.  It's important to keep a positive attitude, and nervous system nutrients help.

Invisable disabilities are so hard for people to realize sometimes that you have.

Vibe

I totally agree w/ you 100 %. I also feel the same way you do & act the same way as in taking things to heart. Thank You for sharing. It has really mad me sit & think. Thank You.