Something more to share from Grayeagle

Saugh-he, I was on a path to bless a pow-wow circle and do a Eagle ceremony. Little Squirrel and I had left our lodge the day before so that I would be rested and ready to start the ceremony at Sun rise. The back of my truck was filled with the contents of my prayer stick, drum, feathers, white corn meal, tobacco, my medicine bag that was wrapped in Wolf skin and many other objects …. That night I was too tired to carry it all in the room we were staying in. I felt that they would be safe, after all, who would dare steal a Medicine Mans medicine bag or his power objects ….

I got up early the next morning and I went out to my truck. The door to my truck was wide open, the things I had in the glove compartment were all over the floorboard and seat …. With a heavy lump forming deep in my gut I looked behind the seat where my medicine objects had been placed and my thoughts became the truth. They were gone, all of them were gone ….

A tingling sensation began in my head and began to slide into my body through my spine …. My ears were ringing and I began to feel light headed and that also, followed the tingling and slid into my whole body. Words entered my awareness and I spoke them as if in a trance ….

"It feels like spring house cleaning," I heard myself speak to Standing Bear the Chief and the others their. Gradually little by little, awareness caught up to my voice. The feeling of lightness was like unfettered flying …. I had been let go and was free ….

That moment began a transformation in my life that has paled most others into insignificance. Burdens began to lift from my shoulders ….

I felt as if I had been left with nothing except myself …. The last time that had really happened was eight years earlier, when I had gone into the woods to be alone with Creator, Earth Mother, Drum and myself, that’s when I met Graywolf. So maybe it wasn't so bad after all.

Crisis in the Chinese written language is a combination of the ciphers for both danger and opportunity, and thus was feeling very much like it could also be an opportunity.

My drum, which is seen by my ancestors as a carrier of prayers like the canoe is a carrier of people, was safe because I had taken it into the room with me to keep the heads tight, because I would use it in the Eagle ceremony the next morning. So there I was again, as with my meeting Graywolf, alone in the woods with nothing but my drum. Last time I was with the Graywolf, he helped changed my life and led me to develop my understanding of insight and my faith side of myself. What would Creator hand me this time.

Now that I was free of the bonds of my medicine objects, I began to notice things. For instance, it was the people who were looking to me for the Eagle ceremony, that gave me the greatest feelings and those to who I looked for, had left me feeling the most disempowered and it all was felling to me like an illusion.

I noticed that in the Eagle ceremony for the people, I was drawn more and more to my old standby medicine that I had with Graywolf and my dreams. And as I worked with these dreams there was a hidden depth far deeper in the dream than the symbols and the story line …. I strayed deeper into this reality, the most interesting things would happen and the people and myself came away from the ceremony feeling empowered and somehow more healed. I began to contemplate that my own real medicine had come from my Graywolf vision and I had never been entirely sure whether that had been a dream within a dream, a product of my imagination and fear or a real wolf …. It didn't seem to matter.

I began to refill my empty medicine bag with Creator and dreams. I began to explore deeper and deeper into my dreams, past the plot, past the symbols and into the deeper energies that had thrust these symbols and stories into my awareness. The symbols, I recalled from my earlier teachings, were meant to fool my ego with censored energies and material from the unconscious ….

"What is this unconscious material-energy" I wondered. I learned how to guide myself deeper into my dreams and past the symbols to directly experience the realms of my unconscious and I found among many other things, healing. I would feel things like tingling sensations, body rushes and emotional states which brought much ease to my dis-eased mind and body …..

The walk was into the fear and pain because the pain shows where the healing energy is needed and the healing force is right there inside the pain ….

My ancestors in me, reawakened by my curiosity, returned to grace and began working, now in cooperation with Creator and Earth Mother. I developed consciousness maps and new models of my ego to understand this new phenomena to me and they seemed more complete and explained more of the full nature of humanness, than the older models of training. As I did this I became aware that it was not I who was the healer, but the energy in the dreams and the dreamers themselves …. I retired from healer into the role of a tracker and mentor.

Some of the states of consciousness I found within my dreams even began to sound like what is described as God, Nirvana or the Tao. From these states I returned deeply changed …. For example, Humble Bear was unable to talk or form words for almost thirty minutes after returning and then could only break his silence by laughing. Prior to this walk he had been in deep depression for several years. This Godlike place was already there, deep inside of him.

I continued to notice things and soon found that imagination was another path into t  [ send green star]  [ accepted]

I continued to notice things and soon found that imagination was another path into these deeper realities, what I now recognized as sleep and unusual states of consciousness, states that exist in each of us and that are beyond the structure and limitations of space and time.

My drum had begun opening these doorways and I soon found I could dispense with the drum. Imagination was all that was needed and so it, too, was added to my medicine bag. My ego and consciousness maps became even deeper and more refined and generalized.

I have now dropped the name or title of healer or shaman entirely, although people usually get healed when we walk together an I am now just a tracker or mentor for the inner walk to self empowerment and healing real-ization. The walks inside that lead people to this state of the realization of their own healing, power, and goddness are usually scary, just like someone's first trip with a river guide in the white water rapids of a river. But the river flows and even if you get tossed our in the middle of the rapids, the current still carries you past the rocks and into the next calm. And the river guide is there to teach you and keep you safe until you learn how to ride the current on your own.

Each walk is unique and a product of our mutual creative energy. It is a terrain in which emotions may be colors, pain a giant yellow sun about to explode and shadows may be filled with light ….

The walk is into the fear and pain because the pain shows where the healing energy is needed and the healing force is right there inside the pain. But we usually surround the pains we experience with fear and that is what keeps us away from them and the healing that is within them. We give our strength to our fear and so our strength is held hostage by that which we fear and these fears direct our lives. To get our strength and lives back, we must face the fears and move through them. Thus, in exploring, the expanding yellow sun of pain releases the pressure/pain and the middle back and neck problem eases. And the lighted shadow side reveals not darkness, but inner allies who light the way with their wisdom and guide you to our strength. It is a path directed by love, trust and faith in ourselves and what we really are ….

The essence of what I have learned on my path, is that there is an immense and limitless source of strength in all of us. We don't really need to look outside for what we are needing for our empowerment, healing, and evolution. It is right there inside of each of us all the time. This healing god-force is founded in and emanates from that part of ourselves we call our creativity. Every religion I know about or have studied has one common denominator, one of the main aspects of the god definition is always the role of creator.

Within us, that personal force of creation or God seems to express itself most profoundly, vividly and real-istically through our dreams and our imagination …. And no matter how deeply buried that is something we all have. That is why my medicine bag is really quite empty, because all we need to heal and empower ourselves is just that, dreams and imagination and they don't take up any space at all, walk with peace.

Grayeagle

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I am sure it is fine for you to do such Grayeagle posts on a friends msn site and he wouldn't do so if he did not want us all to share, learn, and grow.

Be Well, Mitakuye`Oyasin  Julie aka ~Cat~

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