What is Love, caring, and the difference between? January 15, 2007 11:49 PM
To me,.... Loving and caring are different levels of the same basic thing.
To Love, anything or anyone, is usually a willing spirit or attitude of going beyond your comfort zone to help someone, or make something better, or other 'action' for the extended benefit of another person, animal, or thing. Loving is a strong emotional motivator,... that promotes the 'action' to get good things done.
To care about anything or anyone, is usually a willing spirit or attitude of 'doing' what is comfortable to help someone, or make something better, or other 'action' for the benefit of another person, animal, or thing.
The difference between Loving and Caring then would be the willing desire to go beyond the normal comfort zone to provide better conditions for the person or thing loved or cared about.
If someone loved 'only' themselves,... It seems they go way out of their way to be the very best they can be. It seems they would provide for themselves the very best living environment they are capable of gaining. It seems they would make extended efforts to enjoy thier lives more, have more happiness and comfort.
If someone only 'cared' about themselves,... It seems they would do just what is necessary to have as much happiness and comfort as they could get without making any special effort.
If someone did not 'love' or 'care',... it seems they would just take what comes with life,... and if that leads to poverty, disease, abuse and early death,... they tend to blame their discomfort on their surrounding conditions.
An example of this becomes more noticable when you look at parents relationships with their children.
Parents that 'love' their children will work hard at getting a better education, a better job or their own business, a better neighborhood, have hobies so they make better use of their time and have more to share with others,... and make friends with others that 'love' their children so that they provide the very best possible environment so their children can grow up happy, healthy, and comfortable.
While parents that just 'care' about their children will more often skip higher education or just skim through and end up with little to offer an employer,... they will typically be employees because being the boss is a lot of hassle (without the education it is very difficult to be the boss),... they will often live in 'good enough' communities causing their children to suffer the abuse of the other children that are not loved,... they will have friends that tend not to help them develop their lives and provide better for their children,... and they will raise their children with much less concern for their happiness, health, and comfort. Many of these parents raise their children doing just what is required by law,... and little more. I would think that this description resembles around seventy percent of the people in America and other developed countries.
Then there are the parents that just do not love or care about their children. These parents often raise their children as if the children are a 'problem' the parents have to contend with. Some of these children never experience love or caring,... and they pass this cold, unfriendly spirit to their children. The only real chance for these children is when they meet someone that is loving and caring and learn that there is a choice.
These families are where you find extreme poverty,... violence and criminal behavior and a lot of mental illness, disease, and discomfort because nobody cares if they are happy, healthy and comfortable.
I have used children as the example because children reflect what they are exposed to as they grow up. The environment is another where loving or caring can make an obvious and notable difference.
Children that are raised in a loving and caring environment tend to become very caring and thoughtful adults. They tend to be filled with the joy and happiness that was given them as children.
What I find interesting is that parents that do not love or care about their children,... and so do not make special effort to provide the best for their children,... fail to provide for their children because doing so takes effort and desire to provide and that often goes beyond their comfort zone.
While parents that do make the extra effort to provide for their children tend to have a whole lot more comfort, and thus a much more expanded comfort zone.
The same goes for other expressions of love. People that love forests,... tend to plant a lot of trees. People that care about forests tend to complain when forests are cut down but wont participate in activities that get more forests planted. Then there are those that find a condition of joy as they cut down forests,... usually to provide for their families.
[ send green star]
Using this information to improve your comfort level! January 16, 2007 12:42 AM
An overall view of Loving and caring is what happens when love enters the picture.
A single person might live with just what is necessary to get by. Just enough,... not too much,... not to little,... and when disaster strikes,... they suffer for not preparing and having extra.
When a single person finds a mate,... the relationship tends to provide more energy,... and singles together will usually move towards more comfortable living conditions, mostly because they care about the others comfort.
If the singles love each other,... they will make special effort to help their loved one have a better life,... including self improvement in getting a better education so that there are better choices available,... promoting diet and exercise so that each will have better health,... and doing activities that promote better mental and emotional health,... helping each have the highest potential of enjoying happiness, health and comfort.
If the singles only care about each other,... they will likely co-habitate,... accept each other as they are,... and generally just share what they have with each other,... which seldom improves the comfort level of either.
If the singles do not love or care,... then they can very often be detrimental to each other,... and often lower the quality of life they share together.
So,... if you are single,... and entering into a relationship,... it can help to take note of your present living conditions,... and if your living conditions improve,... there is potential that you have chosen to share your life with someone that is capable of loving you.
If you living conditions do not improve,... you might consider how much you really want to live with someone that is not motivated to have a better life,... with you.
When children arrive,... loving parents will usually make special effort and improve their living conditions,... where as caring parents will often make due with what they have,... and it is the energy that comes with a loving or caring relationship that provides for the action necessary to provide better for the children.
If you are a loving and caring person,... I personally do not know how you can stay single,... simply because getting together with another is part of loving,... and not getting together with another is an indication that there is no love to share.
It makes sense to remain single while seeking someone to share love with,... someone that is capable of sharing love,... someone that is capable of wanting the best for you,... but even in that,... a loving person (loving meaning you are willing to make special effort to help another enjoy their life more) would be quite busy helping others have a better life.
To not have a large number of friends who are sharing the adventure of developing a life of wealth and comfort, with you and for you,... would indicate a lack of love.
To have a large number of friends while not helping them develop wealth and comfort would indicate that you care about those others,... but,... if you are a loving individual,... you would make the special effort to help your friends develop health, wealth and comfort.
If you do not have a large number of friends,... and are not becoming wealthy, are not all that healthy, then I think it would be most important for you to find more caring people to share your life with,... because it is downright unhealthy to avoid love and caring relationships.
So, if you are not the best you can be,... find someone to love and use the energy to help them have more happiness and comfort. If you do find someone that is able to love you,... you should notice your health improving,... you should notice your income improving,... and you should notice a wonderful feeling of happiness and comfort.
If you 'feel' uncomfortable sharing your life with others,... take a look at the quality of life of most of the single people you know.
Sure,... some will say they are happy and content,... but take the time to get to know them,... I have found few happy and content single people.
But then,... people tend to open up to me a lot more then they do with others,... and I get to know them better then most,... because getting to know them is a loving thing to do.
Having a lot of friends is a lot like having good insurance. You don't really need them,... until you do,... and then your friends are everything you need to keep from losing what you have. Your health, your wealth, and comfort comes from having good relationships.
I would venture a guess that most of the victims of Katrina found out just how many 'real' friends they had when the storm passed through. But the better view is,... why were there so many people that were devestated by the storm?
If anyone in their lives cared,... their house would have been rebuilt within a year. If anyone actually 'loved' them,... they would have had a second and third house to move to before the storm,... and also enough money to stay at a luxury hotel while the new house was being built.
Friend don't let friends live poor.
I bet every one of the 'victims' of Katrina would argue that they have lots of good friends. Looking now,... we can see who really did have good friends,... they are the ones that did not suffer much or take major losses!
[ send green star]
January 16, 2007 4:22 AM
Our mandate as a friend is to be the very best for our friends reguardless of wealth, status, color etc. By being our very best we bring out the very best in them. Many say this is a dream or a lofty never to be gotten goal..........if we seek to be our best then we will automatically bring out the best in others....... the requirement is not to pick apart, belittle, seek fault and hold others to our moral standard. A very hard pill to swallow.
I must be far more fortunate than many because I can never imagine being homeless, family or friends just wouldnt allow that to happen as I would not allow that to happen to them. At presnt I live in a 3 bedroom home and have10 people in this house .... of the other 4 that live with us......only one is not a family member. We open our doors without requirement or greed.... only expecting them to try and be the best they can be.
How we treat people is most likely taught to us by our parents....I am very fortunate to have a mom tht couldnt and wouldnt say no to others in need.
The diffrenece between love and caring............ there is no difference each honor and reflect the amount of each in all.The only limits and definitions are the ones we plaster on them. Not only to w impact our lives with love and caring we help define both in how we perceive and show others.
[ send green star]
Once we are 'CAPABLE' of love January 20, 2007 1:25 PM
Thank you Shannon,... so happy to find someone that lives a life that includes love!
Is there enough love there to share with me?
Once we are capable of love,... going beyond our comfort zone to do something for the benefit of others....
We can discuss the needs of children and how we can teach those caring(?) for the children how to love them and go out of their comfort zone do help the children have a better life. It is the only way they have to learn about love.
In general,... this simple effort would solve all the world problems.
We would make special effort to love each other, relationships,.... friendship, family, community, national and international relationships would get better because it is good for the children.
We would make special effort to make these things better because we "LOVE',... enough to take action.
posting messages to groups to solve problems
sending invites to those groups so more people can join our loving efforts to begin making a difference now.
meeting each other face to face,... would you meet someone you love? Do you really love someone you wont meet?
doing activities together side by side to make those differences.
lifting everyone we meet,... so each can stop working for corporations,... making money to give to corporations to make a few people rich enough to essentially 'own us',
lifting each other so that each person we make contact with can live happily and comfortable and have an increased potential of reaching their goals and dreams.
Or we can choose to hate, and ignore each other, refuse to meet,... refuse to be friends, refuse to take action,.... and allow nature to kill off people that wont discuss, post, participate, take action for their own benefit much less the benefit of others.
Global Warming is an expected result of not loving.
It is a choice. Make the choice now. Discuss issues you find important, here at MADNow,... and join the MADNow focus groups and participate there,....
Meet other MADNow members,... take part in activities to make our lives better,...
Even if you hate me,... and cannot bring yourself to post an opinion,... or plant a garden, or a forest,.... because you hate me so much that you cannot do anything for or with me....
You can post or plant,... if you love children more then you hate me!
Considering the extreme number of children dying on a daily basis around the world,....
and Considering how many organizations are raising millions,... no billions,... likely trillions of dollars,... and still the children die,...
I may be the only person on Earth that has a plan that would help save the lives of more then 90% of the children that will die each day,... if only I could get some help!
If you cannot participate for me,... participate for the children.
If you are capable of love,... or know anyone that seems capable of love,... please invite them to help us.
Those that do not love children,... wont find the time to help us save the children,... they wont post, they wont participate,.... please focus on those that love children,...
If we do manage to bring love to children,... then the parents can die,... and the children will grow to fix what their parents have destroyed.
[ send green star]
Sharing the Gift of life April 13, 2007 4:24 AM
The Gift of Life
You can't be all things to all people.
You can't do all things at once.
You can't do all things equally well.
You can't do all things better than everyone else.
Your humanity is showing just like everyone else's.
You have to find out who you are, and be that.
You have to decide what comes first, and do that.
You have to discover your strengths, and use them.
You have to learn not to compete with others,
Because no one else is in the contest of *being you*.
You will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.
You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.
You will have learned to live with your limitations.
You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due.
And you'll be a most vital mortal.
Dare To Believe:
That you are a wonderful, unique person.
That you are a once-in-all- history event.
That it's more than a right, it's your duty, to be who you are.
That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.
And you'll be able to stay one up on what used to get you down.
Hope you enjoy this i found to be heart warming a true words we should use with our children..
god bless be well. Love LisaS.
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