It has been over two years since I sat at the keyboard to compose anything substantial. So first, allow me to apologize for my extended absence and I wish I could say it was for reasons noble and heroic, but in truth your author had found someone who injected his life with distraction and bliss. Yet, as with all things, this has passed.
A note, this was all done with amiable, loving pretext, my mantra since August 7th, 2009 has been "This was necessary because ultimately it was inevitable and this has been inevitable because ultimately it was necessary..." The end was like a French noir romantique film. That last, lingering kiss, the one that would never be replaced by another, the opportunity to brush away a tear with my thumb, a secret hand symbol (not the middle finger) as she pulled away from me in her car and into her future. I must say this my beloved loves, if you are going to part ways, do it this way, the memories are simply easier to bear.
In the aftermath, we discover much about ourselves. For example, I discovered my cooking truly sucks. I discovered that love songs rarely have anything to do with love and more to do with losing love and might I suggest you instead stab your ears with a fork... I hurts less. I also discovered that no matter how bad the heartache, no matter how much you want to fall to your knees and quit, no matter how you might perceive it at the time, you will survive and life will find a balance. Eventually you will fall asleep again, despite the loss of the warmth of the body next to you. You will stop seeing their ghost in every corner of your home. At some point, you will hear "THAT" song and not break out in tears and most importantly, you will one day be able to stop using eye drops to stop making your eyes red from tears... My loves it WILL indeed pass.
I am five months on now, five months into a new life, a life of new priorities, new dreams will emerge, new friends bloom from the ashes of what had been such fertile ground. Some suggestions to the newly "single"...
- Dump every song in your iPod (They just serve to bring back what no longer is...)
- DO NOT turn on your radio... (As stated earlier, modern love songs are designed for emotional impact and it is truly easier to elicit an emotion of pain than it is joy...)
- Talk to yourself... (You were there at the beginning and you will be there at the end...)
- Write a long letter saying everything you want to say to that person, but don't EVER deliver that letter... (ALL of it, the good, the bad and the borderline insane... It puts it out of your mind and on paper...)
- When confronted with the inevitable question "So where is ________?" Just answer with... Those circumstances have changed... If the line of questions continue... Glare at them and pick up a brick... That usually closes the line of questioning.
- Whenever possible, do everything they asked you to do while they were there, but you never seemed to remember or do. For example, I had a horrible habit of putting my feet on the bed with my shoes on. I now cannot imagine putting my shoes near my bed... REVENGE IS MINE HA!!! Take that...
- Compliment someone everyday... (It stops you from being and ass and no matter how bad you feel, you just made someone feel better about their day... and increases your chance of getting a date.)
- When confronted with the "I am so sorry" simply smile and say it will be fine and the universe gives us what we need, if not always what we want.
- DO NOT SEEK OR GET UPDATES ON THAT PERSON!!! You REALLY don't want to know... (You are smarter than that and it is less painful to get a root canal through your ear canal... TRUST ME!!!
- Once a week, buy an extra order of fries, a coke and if you aren't a vegetarian, grab an extra burger, then hand it to the first homeless person you see. (They need it and it is better to feed the person than any addiction they may be fighting and you made a difference whether you realize it or not.)
- GET A FRIGGIN JOB or FOCUS ON YOUR CURRENT JOB... (After the break up, I poured myself into work and as far as they are concerned, I am simply awesome. Got me a promotion as well as a raise... Now I just have to keep it up. It got so bad, I got to a point where I literally had nothing left to do, so I did other people's jobs just to keep distracted.)
- Last... DO NOT, under any circumstances, EVER speak poorly of the person that just flipped your life upside down... No matter what they did... This is for your karma not theirs and if you do talk trash, that might be the reason they left you in the first place... Don't be that person.
Now, my beloved loves, how have you been?
Before you read another word "GET COFFEE"!!! I have a habit of writing A LOT. I have been told I write well, which in my opinion is moot, I enjoy writing so I do it... A LOT. Ad nauseum even.
Oh, to the moron that wrote to me and as others have read here before, yes I know my friends on my list are attractive, "ALL OF THEM". But, here is what the neanderthal (And that is pronounced with a hard 'T' not a 'Th' sound ya friggin neanderthal) writer failed to note. The people on my list are not beautiful because of the texture of their skin or their eyes or their physiques, they are beautiful to their cores of their souls and long after the skin wrinkles and the hair turns silver or simply falls out, these people; these rare, incredible people, will still retain their beauty (ALL OF THEM!) That inner fire, that glint in their eyes that will ALWAYS set them apart from the masses, so drop the topic and find something else in the profiles other than the initial photo ya friggin moron.
On that note, this is a message for all those that fall into this profile and read this far, but considering whom this message applies to, the offenders usually simply peruse profiles, look at the picture and add them without reading more than their singles page so I doubt they will have gotten this far, but in the event that one does wander this far into the profile. Here is a word of advice which I have lived by. "You learn far more about what a woman wants, thinks and feels by looking at the neck up than you ever will by looking at the neck down." Here is another thought along that vein. Unless someone specifically requests it, DON'T SEND THEM PICTURES OF YOUR GENITALIA OR ASK THEM TO SEND YOU PICTURES OF THEIRS!!! (A) That is just SO tacky. (B) You are giving the rest of us who share your gender (MALE) a very bad name and (C) Those knuckles are never going to heal if you keep dragging them on the ground. So there you go. Now go git em tiger, I have faith in ya... go on, just don't fill my mailbox with crap about my opinions anymore. Either confront me with logic or keep your beer induced rants to yourself.
Now, I am very opinionated and here are some of the larger issues on the table.
I am pro-homosexual or bi-sexual in either gender, though I am a heterosexual. My belief is that love should be loved. So long as it is 'Safe, Sane and Consensual' Go for it. Just don't do it on my lawn, also, don't knock on my door at two a.m. asking to borrow baby oil. (A) It is annoying... (B) It makes me jealous. So take the morality argument to someone who agrees with you, because I will trounce you and giggle as I blow your argument completely out of the sky. Oh and for those SUPER Christians that use the whole Leviticus argument, you know Leviticus 18:22... "Thou Shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind; It is an abomination..." Well, it wasn't written by any of the Apostles, it was written by the Jewish Levitican monks, four hundred years before the New Testament, so if you are going to follow this logic you better be prepared to breakout the oil lamps at dusk, sacrifice a goat or sheep on the Sabbaths and kill anyone who has cheated on their spouse or sit down and shut up. Can't have only what you like and throw out the chafe, it is all or nothing or take your argument to someone who actually cares and already agrees with you.
I am firmly against anyone who has a closed mind.
I believe that one of the worst things ANYONE, especially the government, can do is to separate a family except under the most extreme circumstances. On that note, if you father a child, SUPPORT the child, not just with cash, if you even do that much, but with love and support. Some of us can't have children and you make me want to puke when you turn your back on your children. There is no excuse you can give, now go be a man and do what men are supposed to do.
I believe that we can honestly co-exist with nature and still have a future with technology as our tool.
I believe we can move this country forward instead of backward and we can do all of this without abandoning our ethics.
NOW FOR THE DEEP STUFF (Yeah, I know, "That wasn't the deep stuff?")
Think of all the moments that went into creating this moment. Not just the moments of your own life, but the moments that occurred when the first Egyptian who strode out of the Nubian grasslands, saw the delta of the Nile and said "This... this is a good place." The person who looked out over the English channel and said. "Something is over there, let's make a boat and find out what is there." and the moment the first time a Persian looked at the sky and said. "You know what the constellation of stars over their looks like...?" These are the moments that all preceeded this moment to create this moment. So let us share this moment in time now my friend and create the moment that will follow.
Now, I leave you to learn what makes an imp and imp. Your resident imp, stirring it up wherever possible, all on my own.
Oh, before I forget, a few numbers to help you stir it up whenever you can. 1(888)818-6641 1(888)355-3588 1(800)426-8073 1(800)614-2803 1(800)839-5276 Know what those are? Those are the numbers for the congress and the senate. CALL!!! CALL OFTEN!!! Be the person they recognize by your voice. Oh and here is this one. 1(866)311-1889 *Gives my most impish grin.* And that one my loves is the number for the White House messages.
I now give you full riegn to go out and stir it up all on your own. Go forth and be a nuisance. Go forth and get under the skin of officials. Go forth and be impish.
Now I warn you, in my journals I have a habit of getting a bit riled up and can be a bit abrassive in language, but nothing too rough, unless I am REALLY annoyed. Still, if you are offended by such language YOU HAVE NOW BEEN WARNED, don't go in there... To all the others that take it with a sense of humor... Enjoy. *winks*
A second warning applies here, I write a lot and I do mean I write A LOT!!! If you don't have time to read the whole thing I never get offended, the fact that you poked your nose in to get the gist is impressive enough as far as I am concerned, but, with that said, do not criticize me because I write A LOT. Attack my point of view, berate my opinion, GREAT, we'll get along famously... Send me an Email because I wrote too much... Come on... Dude, what was that about? I am getting the WEIRDEST E-mails from some of these guys... Sheesh...
Also, if someone could tell me or show me how to make the little blue links in my blogs so people could refer to my data and facts I would REALLY appreciate it... I mean REALLY appreciate it. (Hey, I said I was charming, not computer savvy.)
A slight addendum, if I may. When I say I speak Russian, I am saying I am LEARNING to speak Russian. Anyone willing to help is MORE than welcome; OH GODS please help. I know just enough to get myself lost in Saint Petersburg and then use VERY vulgar language to cuss the taxi driver out. Also, if you think my Russian is bad. HA!!! You should see me with Spanish, you would think that someone living in South Florida would be able to carry on at least a small conversation... It is like watching a grapefruit getting sucked into a lawnmower... Actually I am usually rather impressed that I can make a coherent sentence in English... Sorry for any confusion there... Oops.
So why am I here? After being confronted by a PLETHORA of limited points of view, I seek to determine if there is unbiased, non-partisan human life on this rock.
Now, I understand that especially when dealing with things that touch so many, so closely; that emotions can often run close to sensative nerves. So my solution to this is to keep a good sense of humor (As can be read in my journals, oddly enough the ones that use the abbrasive language are said to be the funniest... Hunh, go figure.) and take all points of view with a great deal of respect, but always with a grain of salt.
Confront me with facts, data and proof. I, Like my role model Carl Sagan, am the perennial sceptic, once I am convinced of an issue though, I become an eloquent ambassador of whatever given issue I have accepted, who can confront opposition with steadfast facts, often deflating their arguments and turning them into ardent supporters of whatever cause I am championing at the time.
I am a vegetarian by choice and understand COMPLETELY why others continue to eat meat. I still have dreams of steaks and hamburgers. (Gets a wistful eyed look, a small tear forming.) Yet, It was a personal decision for me, because I came to the conclusion that killing another animal, usually in rather barbaric ways then eating its muscles and flesh to be a bit counter productive to our evolution. I personally think that if we are going to claim to be the "Thinking and Compassionate" animal on this planet, then we must first start by not eating our companions and neighbors on this planet.
Is it any wonder that if extra-terrestrial life has visited this planet they have not made themselves known to us? I am convinced the first thing we would do is ask if the had any resources we could exploit and if they didn't, we would next find out if they taste like chicken...
I am very shy at first when meeting friends, but I am not one of the wall-flowers either, I have been called a bit moody, of course the fact that I have squinty eyes doesn't help and often confuses people into thinking I am angry or upset when actually I am just trying to figure out why everyone still blames the little blonde cousin that looked like John Denver for killing off the final season of the Brady Bunch... THANKS for the DNA Dad.
Now, it has been noted that I do not have the little singles portion up anymore, this is primarily due to the fact that I don't see Care2 as a singles site with groovy petitions. Not only that, but my agenda is simple, find and meet friends. Here is a question for you; Why would I look for a potential mate before they were my friend ANYWAY? SO it is a moot point in my opinion.
Also, I have a habit of answering Emails WAY slow... I am a bit of a space-cadet as far as that is concerned, but I always get around to it and if you send me something first it makes it easier for me to send something back...
I am a listener, I learned many ages ago that it is hard to understand anything when the only thing I can hear is my own voice in my ears. But, I am always good for a lift in spirits and support my friends 110%, just don't get annoy if we are speaking if I don't say much until the end, I am not ignoring you... I am thinking.
When it comes to my own spiritual path I have always lived by the adage. "I do not question whether there is a divine consciousness in this universe. What I do question is whether He, She, It or They have any reason to take any real notice of us or whether we as mere humans can put any form of personality on them. That to me would be the height of conceit..." So I am a spiritual human, yes. Although I follow no organized religion, I do tend to lean toward Wiccan or spiritual beliefs that give homage and honor to nature.
We live on such a unique planet, so far the only one we have found that can support life and this shows us that on this unique blue ball, we need to do everything possible to keep it in one piece.
Ok... The fact that you have read all the way down to this part tells me that you are either VERY bored, a glutton for words or a masochist.
And if you think the profile was long HA!!!! Try the blog entries... May I suggest refilling the coffee cup *winks*
"I find it amazing and ironic that 'Man' who cannot so much as create a worm, is FOREVER creating Gods."
"Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there - on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam."
Dear Michael, happy birthday to you! May you soar high and may your deepest heart wishes be fulfilled this coming year. May you always be protected from harm. Have a beautiful day, my friend! Hugs to you, Mayke