Erika R.

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"to attenuate my "Nice Girl Syndrome""

Lehigh Acres, FL, USA
female, age 52
divorced
Speaks: American English, German
Joined Feb 17, 2007

more about Erika R. »

What the World Eats - 15 different families around the globe
http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1626519,00.html

Personal		Professional		Contact		Singles

Joined	Feb 17, 2007	Activist Aspirations	Casual
Here for	Meeting Friends, Dating, Support a Cause
Group Host of	none yet
Groups	Absolutely Single !!!, GreeningWays

Hometown
Homepage
Birthday	Jan 29, 1957
Languages	American English, German
About Me	I have lived the first 49 years of my life as a "Nice Girl." I now recognize and understand that debilitating malady and am joyfully breaking free! I'm a lymphoma cancer survivor - let me change that to I'm a lymphoma cancer treatment survivor. I was 29 and had just graduated nursing college. A year in total of chemo, both oral and IV, radiation sessions, hospitalizations, blood transfusions, bone marrow biopsies, bone marrow harvest. I even got my IV chemo on my 30th birthday. And since it was bitter January in Nebraska, I brought my doctors and nurses a tropical island made of upside-down half of a brown potato, stuck with standing carrots, topped with green bell peppers cut into palm fronds and some topical fruit to eat. I am an independent and strong woman who remains sweet, kind, and compassionate but no longer to the extent of self-sacrifice. My compassion for others was so resolute that even a practicing Buddhist couldn't handle it. He became deceptive, manipulative, and emotionally abusive. Buddhists, I ask you "When does a kind and compassionate woman become a door mat?" I answer "When the recipient of her kindness and compassion fabricates the change." And so, I am a door mat no longer! I no longer prostrate myself even to a Buddhist.
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Lifestyle
Pets	A clowder of cats - all spayed/neutered, The neighbor's dog moved in
Activist Aspirations	Casual
Political Leaning	Liberal
Religions	Consciouness, Book: "What the bleep Do We Know?", Let's share our perspectives
Eating Habits	lots of H20, keep it healthy, almost vegetarian
Wild Fact About Me	privileged information
My Philosophy	You make your own Heaven & Hell - in your mind. You've always held the keys but didn't know it. You've always had the power to choose but didn't know it.
What Gives Me Hope	To have recognized that I have the ability to think and manifest peace, love, and joy for myself. Even though I cannot be, nor do I want to be, ultimately responsible for others' thoughts and actions, I can share my experience -- but not proselytize -- so that perhaps the world outside of me can become a better place.
If I were Mayor, I'd make the world a better place by	retaining integrity
What/who changed my life and why	At age 49 I realized my passage from life to death is drawing closer. While in life we have only the present moment, and in death . . . well, it is a mystery.
What Bugs Me	Any intentional hurt -, from IGNORance to violence
Passions	peace, nature
Inspirations	people already living my aspirations
What Scares Me	cruelty, "War is path to peace"-G W Bush, so much power to those who hate
Favorites
Role Models	Buddha, Mahatma Gandhi, Albert Schweitzer, John Lennon
Quotation	1. Your present thoughts are your life's coming attractions. 2. Quoting Colin McGinn: It felt to me a better world I was living in without God. I mean one of the things about God is everything you as a moral being do is under the scrutiny of this being who's gonna reward you or not as the case may be. I think it compromises people's moral sense, because they feel as if everything they do which is good, they're doing it because God will approve of them and reward them for it. And once you jettison that idea, you do what you should, because you should, because it's the right thing to do and that you don't feel that there's always some sense of self-interest involved in any moral action that you perform. I think it's an oppressive idea that God is always looking into your soul at every moment of the day and weighing you up. It makes people too introspective. So, I found it was sort of liberating to not have that oppressive, Big Brother surveillance from God all the time. And I found the universe more interesting and more stimulating without gods. I thought, you know, investigating the universe without a religious impulse or religious perspective on it was to me a more interesting and stimulating thing to do.
Interests	mind/body/spirit, walking, environment, health & fitness, cats, gardening, photography
Books	self actualization, self improvement
Music	peaceful silence, the purr of a kitten, gentle rain, soft voices speaking kind words, classic rock, Reggae
Movies	films with positive influence, documentaries
TV Shows	intelligent - enthusiastic self, educational - analytical self, warm-hearted comedy - emotional self
Favorite Foods	fresh veggies and fruits, Haagen Dazs Black Walnut ice cream
Favorite Places	lying beside my lover, the Hoh Rainforest, Mt. Rainier, national parks and forests
Can't Live Without	clean air, clean water, natural foods, peace of mind and of heart
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