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Aug 27, 2006

The Witch I am

Author: Strahbary
Posted: August 27th. 2006
Times Viewed: 74

When someone says ‘Witch’, the usual image that is conjured up is that of the stereotypical Halloween witch with warts and a knack for scaring children. Type ‘Witch’ in a search engine and you get pictures of either ugly hags or beautiful fantasy scantily clad Witches. Two opposite ends of the spectrum. What about the in between? What about the average, everyday girl next door?

I don’t think of myself as over the top; look at me, I’m a Witch! No, I just go about my business blending in with the rest of the people in the grocery check out line. Sometimes I doubt myself. Is it possible to be a Witch and actually live an everyday normal life? Do I have to be so engrossed within the Pagan subculture that I should be an outsider from the rest of mainstream society? The reality is that I can’t. I can’t be that kind of girl. It’s not that there is anything wrong with that, but it’s not true to who I am. I like being trendy and using make up (hell, I considered being a cosmetics sales girl at one point). I try to be a vegetarian, but not because I feel that it breaks the Rede by eating chicken. I just don’t like meat that much, much to the dismay of my “I love being a carnivore” husband. Sometimes I wonder if this causes me to be shallow or not as in tune with my faith as I feel I should be.

However, I am who I am. I love a good day of pampering myself, spending time outdoors, practicing yoga and just living life. Perhaps it is a balance of the mainstream world and my religion. I may not stand on the street corner and proclaim I am Wiccan, hear me roar, but I do not hide from the truth. Once a work acquaintance “discovered” that I was Wiccan. She just looked at me and said, “Well I kind of figured you were somewhere along those lines.” After I inquired further, she said the reason for it was that I had dark hair, dark eyes and I liked making things. Well, I guess I don’t blend in as much as I thought I did.

Then again, there are others with different stereotypes of a modern day Witch that I guess I completely throw for a loop. A friend of mine that I have known for several years didn’t know what my specific faith was. We would have philosophical discussions and of course, I never miss an opportunity to share my opinion (what can I say, I like to talk) . Our perspectives were really not all that different. One night while having dinner with her, the subject of my faith came right out in the open and I shared with her what my faith was, which was a bit of a shock for her to say the least. I guess she had assumed all these years that I was Christian or something along those lines. I told her my story. How I came to a crossroads and searched for a faith where I could feel spiritually fed and that I came to Wicca and I have never looked back. I spent time learning about it, being more careful in my religious decision than anything else I had chosen to do in my whole life. She looked me dead in the eye and said “Diana, you’ve changed”. I said, “No, as long as you have known me I have held this faith. This is just another aspect of my life that I am letting you in on.”

In the end, we all have to do what is right for us, whether it’s being involved with certain activities, how we act with others or the faith that we choose to follow. The basics of it are that we have to be true to ourselves first and foremost. When the lights are out and the party is over, it’s just us. We can be a chameleon to the rest of the world but when we are alone, why should we bother trying to fool ourselves? For that matter, why even be a chameleon to the rest of the world? We don’t have to stand on the busiest corner of town yelling out to the world “I am Wiccan, I am proud, so deal with it!” A wise person told me that religion is a private matter. It really doesn’t do much for that whole freewill thing to be trying to shove our beliefs down someone else’s throat. I mean, I have yet to tell my parents my beliefs. But at this point, they have got to know that I am no longer Christian. Really, right now I am ok with that. I have learned that coming out of the broom closet should not be something forced. If the time is right to tell who we truly are to someone, then so be it. It’s not my parent’s turn, yet.

There is no one standard of who we should be. There is such wonderful variance in Wicca that it shouldn’t matter. I am a solitary Witch that enjoys being outside, practicing yoga and continually striving to learn more about the universe’s mysteries. I may not be the foremost expert in the ways of the Craft. I may be completely off base with my theories and musings. However, these have worked for me. I may not be the stereotypical Witch, but I am a happy one and I feel intact in my spirituality. There was a time when I could feel the chaos that raced through my head. It was like a constant battle for my sanity everyday. Once I started practicing Wicca, the chaos ceased. Everything fell into place and my life came on track.

Through much of my meditation and study, I have come to a point where I have focused on the Goddess and her mysteries, recognizing the aspect of Her that is inside of me. Pampering myself and taking part in activities that I enjoy keeps me in touch with my inner Goddess. So I don’t stand out so much and to some people, I blend in at the supermarket. I am me and that is all I can hope for. In my everyday life, I am able to connect with Her in some aspect. Even if it is just sitting in my favorite chair knitting, I am able to move into an active meditation. My Wiccan life style doesn’t need to consist solely of spells and rituals and end there. By recognizing both the God and the Goddess, I can make my religion an active form of my life. I don’t know where my faith ends and my everyday life begins. I am Wiccan, I say it as if I were to say I am tall, I have brown hair etc. It is who I am. My life has become intertwined with it. I have finally become the woman I have dreamed of and I wouldn’t change her for the world.

Visibility: Everyone
Posted: Sunday August 27, 2006, 7:35 am
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Monica Rega (96)
Friday September 8, 2006, 7:42 am
This is a wonderful, beautiful statement and well telling of who I am ... I'm proud of her and of all of us who do and feel the same way. I long to be that, I'm sorta out of the broom closet, if i feel that I can say yeah i'm a witch then i do and only when i feel its appropriate and i'm ready. Some of my family doesn't know my beliefs and that's ok We don't have to tell everyone inthe world or our lives. I give kudos to this author of this blog. Merry Meet and LOVE and LIGHT
Catnip_Willow
aka
Monica

Serena Luna (347)
Thursday September 28, 2006, 12:43 am
Blessed Be sister for keeping this alive and true to our hearts. Serena~~

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