START A PETITION 25,136,189 members: the world's largest community for good
START A PETITION
x
Dec 14, 2005

The Rules of Chocolate

If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite, and you'll eat less.

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

Money talks. Chocolate sings. Beautifully.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Therefore, you need to eat more chocolate.

Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Now, isn't that handy?

If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. You can't let that happen, can you?

Visibility: Everyone
Posted: Wednesday December 14, 2005, 8:53 pm
Tags: [add/edit tags]

Group Discussions
Comments
Or, log in with your
Facebook account:

Ingrid C. (50)
Monday January 9, 2006, 11:33 am
Very cute. I love chocolates. Ingrid

Katie G. (2)
Saturday April 8, 2006, 10:26 am
Yummy... Who doesn't Love Chocolate!!

Robin Donnelly (3)
Friday June 2, 2006, 9:28 am
I'm a chocaholic too and I loved this lost!
Robin

Quatrina P. (11)
Thursday December 21, 2006, 11:45 am
Did you Know Chocolate is an adult drug and should not be consumed by anyone under the age of 21.

Author

Katie G.
female, age 29, committed relationship
New Paris, IN, USA
KATIE'S SHARES
Dec
14
(5 comments  |  discussions )
A Father's 10 Rules for Dating His DaughterRule One:If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.Rule Two:You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so...
Dec
3
(1 comments  |  discussions )
Is it possible? Can sex really be better than the game we love or will our national pastime win during the final at-bat?The following "reasons" were plucked from internet news groups by Baseball Almanac over the years and put together in wha...
(1 comments  |  discussions )
41 Stupid Things to Do in a Men's Public Restroom Introduce yourself to the guy at the next urinal. Turn the light off while stalls are occupied. Order a pizza. (This works great in bars that allow outside food deliveries. Call back the pizza parlor t...


SHARES FROM KATIE'S NETWORK
Dec
30
(0 comments  |  discussions )
You Are Cherry Kiss Lip Gloss You're a total girly girl who's every guy is sweet on.You take pleasure in the simple things in life, from cute t-shirts to stuffed animals.Any guy needs to match your romantic idealism to win your heart, which is why few...
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Your Celebrity Style Twin is Kirsten Dunst More hippie chic than hippie chick. Who's Your Celebrity Style Twin?
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Your Nail Polish Color is Pink How you're unique: You're girly without being high maintenanceWhy your style rocks: You're the perfect blend of stylish, preppy, and cuteWhat this color says about you: "I am secure enough not to follow every trend&...
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Your Winter Look is Cute You always bring color to a dreary winter day! What's Your Winter Look?
(0 comments  |  discussions )
You Are a Flashy Red Bra! Outgoing, friendly, and fascinating.You're a charmer, with your pick of the men.But you want a man who's as magnetic as you are.You need someone who can keep up with your all night gab fests! What Kind of Bra Are You?


MORE MEMBER BLOGS
Mar 31
Blog: How to Extend the Life of your TRIAD Boilers by Kayleigh L.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — How to Extend the Life of your TRIAD Boilers   Corliss Engine Review Every user desires to prolong the life of a unit. TRIAD assists their clients in achieving this important objective by informing them of ways they can avoid problems and sh... more
Feb 27
Blog: Dr Oz Weight Loss - The 100% Natural And Very Efficient Diet Pill by Debra S.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — Yes, Dr. Oz called Garcinia Cambogia Extract (HCA) the Holy Grail of Weight Loss. He went on to say, “Anytime I see a scientist get this excited about something like Garcinia Cambogia Extract and when I looked through some of this research and ... more
Blog: My Favorite Websites by krysta I.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — IFAW: www.ifaw.org OCEANA: www.oceana.org PETA: www.peta.org EARTH 911: www.earth911.org ANIMALs ASIA: www.animalsasia.org more
Feb 21
Blog: testing one two three by Geoff M.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — hello world more
Blog: Garcinia Cambogia Reviews From Actual People Garcinia Pure Extract Is A Huge Success February 20 by Dany M.
(0 comments  |  0 discussions ) — Garcinia Cambogia Reviews From Actual People Garcinia Pure Extract Is A Huge Success February 20 Garcinia Cambogia System The Dr. Oz Lose Weight Quick Process Without Having Side Effects He went on to say, “At any time I see a researcher get ... more
 
Content and comments expressed here are the opinions of Care2 users and not necessarily that of Care2.com or its affiliates.