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Jan 5, 2006

I remember in high school on the verge of a breakdown how I turned really negative as a way to protect myself. Now I think that wasn't such a horrible since after all. All these years trying to be nice all the time and having no defences, no wonder I am so tired and drained. I gave myself away so easily, now I know to be more careful. Sometimes it doesn't pay to be nice, sometimes you gotta be hard and careful who you're friends with. My energy is delicate and needs protecting. Being a loner isn't that bad.
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Posted: Thursday January 5, 2006, 6:50 am
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Colleen Finley (3)
Thursday January 5, 2006, 8:10 am
Oh yes, it is so easy to let yourself be drained by others who would rather use your energy than finding their own. It took me the better part of 50 years being an "advisor" and "friend" to seemingly "lost" soles I felt empathy for. Two of the "friends" I had maintained a strong relationship with for over 30 years desolved our bonds for trivial STUPID reasons - both people were heavy users of drugs and alcohol and chose the drugs over our friendship. That hurt. It hurt so much that I vowed to always keep a safe distance and be very careful with sharing my heart. I believe strongly that many many soles are deeply wounded and very unaware (also called dysfunctional). I feel for them, but it is not my place to "fix" them all. It is important to protect yourself and be very alert to the "red flags", but it is also important to keep in touch with the world. Right now I don't have more than 2 people I call friends, that's why I come here!


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