I've been disabled since 1992, and am in a group of people that the government apparently didn't think to think about. Of course, when does the government really think about the people?
At any rate, I was a single mom when I became disabled. My daughter is now 19, and off to college on grants, scholarships, and other financial assistance, including loans. Two and a half years ago I became a mom for the second time. Another daughter.
I broke down in tears at my new doctor's office, because I remember when my oldest was little how she would cry for me to play with her or chase her, but I couldn't. My second daughter was approaching the age of "chase me," and it ripped my heart out to think that again I wouldn't be able to play with my child. At the time all I could do was sit in a chair and wish for pain relief. My doctor took sympathy and prescribed a very small amount of a medium-strength pain medication to offer some relief. That was almost 2 years ago.
As the time has progressed, my daughter has been at the "chase me" stage for some time, and now is taking a gymnastics class that I cannot attend with her because of the pain I am in. One of her grandmothers graciously paid for the classes, and attends them with her. But now my daughter is saying, "Mama, come watch me!" And I can't.
The pain has progressed and encompasses most of my back, and has developed a "pinched nerve" sensation that runs from one of my hips, down into my leg. It is worse. And it has been nearly 2 years since they did an x-ray of my back to check on my spine. I think it is time for another.
Again, even with the pain medications, I am only able to sit in a chair and watch her. It is painful - emotionally - to know that I cannot play with her.
I am grateful, though, for what my doctor has done for me so far. I'm on Medicaid, and most of the time - at least here - the medical attention you get is not the best quality. Most of the doctors I've seen in the past automatically act like I am a drug addict when I say that I hurt and need help to relieve the pain. It has literally been like a commercial I saw for a medication for an arthritis medication: This is the life you lead, and this is the life you want to lead.
I'm frustrated because I can't get help for my condition due to no one wanting to accept Medicaid. My doctor said it would be an ordeal to even get me in to see a GYN for regular check-ups. I admire my current doctor for his true desire to help people, and for his honesty, but I am still in pain.
I really don't know what to do at this point.