Do you have body sensations you do not understand?
Examples of such inexplicable experiences include:
- skin rashes
- cold chills
Do you feel you will faint on occasion?
Have you almost proven to yourself that it's not due to physical exercise, illness, PMS or menopause?
Are you often surprised at your own appearance?
- Do you sometimes feel invisible?
- Do you feel you can make yourself so unobtrusive that you feel you are practically invisible?
- Do you enter an invisible feeling when you are buying binge foods or eating them?
Are you attracted to people who betray you?
Do you feel you are wrong and apologize when someone hurts you?
Do you sometimes think you are special?
Do you get angry when others will not alter plans for you?
Do you sometimes or often think it is your lot in life to suffer?
Do you regularly feel lonely, incompetent and fragile in a harsh world?
- Do you feel that this is the real you and you must guard against anyone knowing it?
- Do you feel extremely moved, surprised and grateful when someone shows you a small consideration or appreciation?
Do you work excessively to achieve cultural prizes like money, degrees, status, adulation, perfect body - all without satisfaction?
If you try to relax do you feel unbearable anxiety and not know what to do with yourself?
Do you lead a double life?
Do you keep information and activities hidden from others?
- sexual liaisons
- roles you play in different areas in your life
- future plans
- sexual practices
- hobbies and personal interests
Do you lie regularly?
Do you lie when you don't have a reason, and you don't know why you are lying?
Do you have a regular habit of pushing the same ideas or information out of your mind because you know you don't want to ever think about them?
Do you regularly postpone to the point of not doing an activity at all?
Do you postpone doing activities where you know in your mind that you could probably do well, but you are too nervous to get started?
Examples of this can include:
- sending out a completed job application.
- sending out a completed school application.
- calling someone who might be a mentor for you.
- taking an adult education class in something you think might be fun or interesting.
- Saying yes to an invitation to submit an idea or piece of work which, if accepted, would bring you into contact with new people in a new and challenging setting.
Do these questions make you anxious?
If you answer, "yes," to many of these questions you may have a secret from yourself. If you are angry or frightened that these questions exist, you have a secret from yourself. If you feel anxiety thinking about these questions, you have a secret from yourself.
If you are curious and anxious at the same time, you are on the threshold of discovery. Your curiosity can keep you on the healing path.
If you have read these questions and want some genuine answers to questions you have about yourself, despite any anxiety you may feel, you are already on your Triumphant Journey.
In the Secret Discovering Exercises section of Triumphant Journey and the accompanying Action Plan you will find a way to discover what your secrets are as you simultaneously develop the necessary strength to face them. This is the healing journey that can lead to personal triumph.
Secret Discovering Exercises
In following these exercises you will create a book which will become a map, guide and vital resource for your triumphant journey. As you proceed on this new healing path you will gradually see your secrets unfold and become known by you in many surprising and relieving ways. You will begin to recognize how overeating and other out of control behaviors shield you from self knowledge.
Soon you will be stronger and more free to choose new and more positive actions. You will begin to experience more health and joy in your life. You will not only recognize opportunities, but have more courage to act on them. You will bring more quality to your life than you have ever known.
Establish a trustworthy support system so you have one or more friendly witnesses who are aware of your efforts.
Support could be:
|sympathetic friend on a similar journey|
|trusted friend or friends|
|members of a psychotherapy group|
|12 step companions|
|12 step sponsor|
|other trustworthy and reliable person who is capable of tolerating your strong feelings without getting pulled into them|
(As close and as sympathetic some family members might be, it is usually best to have support for this process be someone who is not a relative.)
There will be times when you feel more than you think you can bear. You will need a trustworthy companion.
At first, one kind friend may be enough. Eventually, if you seriously engage yourself in these exercises, you may need more regular and reliable support than one friend can give. That's normal.
Remember and list experiences that soothe and inspire you. Your list might include:
listening to music
playing with a pet
working cross word puzzles
warm baths or showers
working with clay
Whenever you find yourself having an enjoyable experience where you are happy or just more comfortable being you, describe that experience on paper and add it to your list. You are building your awareness of genuine support, health and joy resources. You will this specific and written list as you proceed through the Action Steps on your Triumphant Journey.
Be kind and appreciative of yourself. Acknowledge yourself as part of your support system.
Every morning read aloud several affirmations 
to the walls, the garden, the furniture and the mirror. This will help you build a kind appreciation for yourself. When you discover a thought that is meaningful and helpful to you, add it to the affirmations list. Create your own affirmations making sure they are each in a positive form.
Let yourself know how much of your life has been consumed with protecting your secrets. Often guarding and hiding inner secrets becomes the basic organizing principle which governs all your actions.
Think about what you have been absolutely certain about what you can and cannot do. Examples to get you started thinking about this are:
|What kinds of things are okay for you to talk about?|
|What kinds of things must you or dare you not talk about?|
|What kind of people can you be with?|
|Who must you not be with or dare not be with? |
|What can ask of yourself or others?|
|What must you not dare to ask of yourself or others?|
|What kind of treatment or environment or life style must you accept, like it or not?|
|What kind of treatment, environment or life style do you barely allow yourself to dream of?|
|Are there ways of living that other people can have but never you? |
|Is it forbidden, for some reason, for you to try to bring that way of living into your life?|
Getting acquainted with the power and influence of your belief system takes time, patience and courage. When you start to question these beliefs you begin to challenge the power of your inner secrets.
Some limits you impose on yourself are free choices. For example, you may choose to take a boring part time job because it gives you time to be with your baby or take a class or work on a project that is important to you yet brings in no income. That's a free choice.
But if you take a boring part time job because you believe that you can't ask for more or expect more then you may well be under the influence of inner secrets you don't know about.
Hidden inner secrets can't let you know about your own strength. If you have knowledge and strength, you might challenge the system which holds you down. And overeating holds you down.
Remember to breathe and allow yourself to be surprised.
Breathe evenly and surely. Watch you breath and allow oxygen to nourish your body and mind.
As you breathe, allow yourself to be surprised. When you are surprised, allow yourself to breathe. Remember to exhale fully.
When you are surprised, you are discovering something. Your surprise is a major signal that you are uncovering inner secrets. In time those nameless secrets will be understood, named and resolved. With every surprise and resolution of secrets comes more understanding and freedom.
Elaborate on these exercises to make them your own.
You might include a phrase, comment, affirmation, prayer, or quote that touches your heart or your imagination.
These are personal strands of awareness that touch your genuine self. As you gather these strands, your desire to live healthy and strong will weave them into a healing, teaching, strengthening support system that will help make you whole.
Overeating is such a puny substitute for the strength and beauty you can create within yourself.
You can have self confidence based on true personal strength and wisdom.
At least once every three weeks, read your book aloud. You will be sharing truth and freedom with yourself.
These are seven preparatory steps for your taking specific action. What follows is the Action Plan, the method you will use to be free of overeating.
The Action Plan is the heart of your Triumphant Journey.