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Nov 19, 2012

Daughters Of Suicide


Suicide Awareness and Prevention from Daughters of Suicide
Author: Cheryl (Cher MyOpinion)
November 19, 2012
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem!


Have you or someone you know been left in the aftermath of a loved one who has taken their own life? Trying to deal with this is the test of all strength you have inside, sometimes you wonder if you are strong enough to make it though at all. Suicide is a taboo topic a lot of times. It rips apart family and destroys lives of all who are in its wake. It makes you question everything you have ever known. It challenges your faith as well as your will. I mean how can someone you love so much ever make a decision like this?
One thing I have learned is this question will NEVER be answered. Waiting for this question to be answered keeps you in prison inside yourself. No longer does anything mean what it once did. Holidays change, birthday's bring pain, it's living hell in my opinion. One thing I do know is that it is something that you can never get over however, you can learn to live with it.
Many things must happen in the process following this nightmare. A train wreck of emotions you can never prepare for starts a full speed derailment taking down everything in its path. Marriages fall apart, relationships change the way you look at the world becomes such a blur because for the first time you can't see what's to come. Then despair, anger, and sadness, you can't go on from here until you deal with these three things. For some it never happens.
How do you make sense of this? How do you tell yourself it's going to be OK? You wonder why you can't cry, you can't laugh, can't love. Your heart becomes numb to everything that once brought feeling. Once that numbness wears off is when the walls start to fall in. This is when you must hold on for dear life.
There are things that you need to do to get through this. One of those things IS NOT alcohol and it's NOT drugs. These things are what some reach for in a moment of despair to bring comfort, don't fool yourself it's not comfort you get this is just a band aid covering the wound of your bleeding heart. Once the band aid comes off you are still where you were and now you have just been there longer.
I want to give you some facts about suicide you may or may not have heard before. Some of these numbers will be shocking.
Did you know:
·       For every 2 people murdered in the United States there are 3 people who take their own lives?
·       Males are 4 times more likely to commit suicide then females, however, females make and attempt 3 times more frequently than males with failed success.
·       Every 40 seconds in the World someone dies from suicide, that is nearly 1,000,000 a year, almost 32,000 of those are here in the US.
·       Out of 100,000 deaths worldwide 16 of those are from suicide, in the US alone for every 100,000 deaths 11 of them are suicide.
·       In the last 45 years suicide has went up 60% worldwide.
·       Between 1952 and 1995 suicide among teens has tripled in the US, and from 1995 to 2005 suicide has tripled again.
·       Since the IRAQ war began we have lost more US soldiers to suicide then we have on the battle field.
·       In America Caucasians are more likely to die from taking their own life then other racial backgrounds.
·       Almost a fourth of all who commit suicide never mention it to friends or family, and the ones that do are 50% less likely to follow through.
·       In the US suicide is one of the three leading causes of death in in people ages 25-44, and the second leading cause of death in ages 10-24.
·       Warning signs to look for:
·       Depression or sadness for more than a few days lasting weeks and or months (depression is the number one cause of suicide)
·       Talking about wanting to die
·       Isolation or withdraw from family and friends
·       Feelings of hopelessness, helplessness, anger, rage, sadness
·       Drastic changes in behavior, weight, eating habits, sleep
·       Loss of interest in things once enjoyed
·       Feelings of guilt or shame that appear overwhelming
·       Giving away possessions(I know that sounds weird but this is a very common sign)
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts or actions seek help, there is no shame in admitting you need a hand. Reaching out is sometimes a hard thing to do. One must also understand that the person who is at risk sometimes don’t have the ability to see it for themselves. This is what makes family and friends the most important tool in prevention, you all may have to make a team effort in the loved one seeking help. Like a drug addict they need an intervention. 

For Veterans struggling with adjusting to life once home from war its hard to seek help for this issue brought on by PTSD. Once they seek help they are treated in such a way that blows my mind. They can even be discharged for seeking help for suicidal thoughts or actions. This needs to change NOW. That is mind blowing to me but it's the truth. They make it hard for these men and woman to return to civilian life after having been though literal hell on Earth. They have lived though and seen things that would make your hair stand on end.
Some things you should never and I repeat never do if you suspect someone is at risk. Never think when they say or talk about suicide, that it’s a joke or just an attention issue. This is a very DEADLY mistake. I know because I made it myself. Living with that to me has been the fight of my life. Always take them seriously. Never leave them alone. Depression and sadness are common. That’s life for everybody. The key here you need to understand and look for is these symptoms hanging on for a long period of time.
Depression is a medical condition when it last more than a few days. Let me give you some resources to turn to just in case you or someone you know may need them. Just remember love can help anybody who is suffering. The loved ones often times suffer the most, we hurt the ones we love most.

I have started a group today called Daughters Of Suicide if you or someone you know needs help we can all come together here for support, please join me
IN LOVING MEMORY OF ELLEN WALLNER I MISS YOU MOM LOVE YOU

this was written mothers day 2009 by Cheryl
UNTIL THEN
mother tell me why you took your life,
you were a grandmother,
you were a mother ,
you were a wife,
put on earth to help save others life.
i need to know why you left me here,
how come you gave up the fight?
How the heck can you make that decision,
who the hell gave you only GODs right.
How dare you give the burden to my brother of finding you that day,
how dare you make him remember you that way!!
you have come to me in nightmares, I was full of sweat panic and fear.
Im finally letting go of all the guilt and self destructive ways,
Ive cried my last tear,
I have to let go of the pain of that day,
for me to be the person i set out to be its the only way...
im done trying to numb myself of the way your selfish act left me to feel.
its long overdue and time for my heart, soul and spirit to heal.
I dont know where your soul is now and that used to make me weep,
mom all i can do now is pray the lord your soul to keep.
I know someday i will be with you again,
but for now I love you mom good bye till then.



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Posted: Monday November 19, 2012, 4:36 pm
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Cheryl O.
female , committed relationship, 1 child
Lincoln, IL, USA
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