What does it mean to love someone? Does it mean to be fond of someone? To help someone? To stand by someone in hard times? To desire someone? To need someone? To let someone in peace even if we donÂ´t feel like it?
Does it means to wish this person the best for him/her, even if we have to sacrifice ourselves? To give him/her opinions as a disinterested part? Or just to embrace someone as he/she is, without trying to change him/her?
Often we are not really in love with someone. We are in love with the idea of someone instead. With the idea about how our life together with this person could be, if only he/she could be how we would love him/her to be. If only he/she would love us how we want to be loved. If only he/she could give us what we want to get.
What would happen, if we would be ready to accept what the person is able to give us, even if this is not what we would love to have? Maybe true love is just like that?
[A big and unlucky love story, in real-life as on screen:
Orson Welles and Rita Hayworth in The Lady from Shanghai (1947)]
I don't remember if it was Orson Welles or Marlon Brando, who stated in an interview ages ago, that deeply embracing someone with his good and his bad sides is possibly the only true kind of love. It works for love, friendship, working relationships, said Orson. Or maybe it was Marlon...
I am not wondering if it's easy or not. I know that itsn't and that it often is very difficult instead, if not almost impossible.
I am rather wondering: is it worth the effort? Is it worth the effort, loving someone even while knowing that this person is never going to be able to give us what we need and what we desire?
What if what we get from someone we love, would not be enough?
Is it possible to choose to not love someone?
Mae West, the art of love & the golden silence
Tags: Love, Embrace, Orson Welles, Marlon Brando