Butterfly Rewards - earn free credits and redeem for good causes -  learn more!
my care2
make a difference

community & fun

shares

share your passions, stories, inspirations, and more

May 28, 2008

Now this............ my friends, is totally brilliant and worth the read or is that reed or possibly Reid!

This is for those who think German is hard.

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.


2) The farm was used to produce produce.


3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.


4) We must polish the Polish furniture.


5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?


Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats ar e candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"


You lovers of the English language might enjoy this

There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is
< U> "UP."

It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?  At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?  Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is itUP to the secretary to write UP a report?

We call UP our friends.  And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.  We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.    At other times the little word has real special meaning.  People stir UPtrouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.

And this UP is confusing:  A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We openUP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.

We seem to be pretty mixed
UP about UP! To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary.  In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions. If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used.  It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP.  When the sun comes out we say it is clearingUP

When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.

When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.

One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it
UP, for now my time is UP , so........... it is time to shut UP.....

Visibility: Everyone
Posted: Wednesday May 28, 2008, 7:27 pm
Tags: english language words [add/edit tags]

Group Discussions start a discussion
Comments
Or, log in with your
Facebook account:
Compose your comment and submit:




Jason T. (144)
Sunday June 1, 2008, 2:37 pm
Perhaps key words are the answer, lol. English is quite the challenge, even for Americans.

Romana G. (113)
Saturday October 3, 2009, 11:36 pm
really interesting, thank you:)

Author

Sky Bird C.
Author Tools:
Compose New Share
female , married, 2 children
Olathe, KS, USA
SKY BIRD'S SHARES
Jul
11
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Hi, I just signed an important petition to help get our country back on track, and I hope you’ll join me. In today’s economy, working folks like you and me need a fair deal and a chance to get ahead. But some CEOs just go too far. They ...
Jul
10
(2 comments  |  discussions )
SCENARIO: Customer: Yes, I want to cancel my account. I don't want to do business with you any longer. The Bank: Why? Customer: You're giving credit to illegal immigrants and I don't think it's right. I'm taking my business elsewhere. The Bank: W...
May
19
(0 comments  |  discussions )
!THIS IS A REPOST!Someone out there has seen some of these faces, someone out there knows something about some of these cases. Someone out there either knows what happened, witnessed something, or were themselves involved. Pass this information around...


SHARES FROM SKY BIRD'S NETWORK
Nov
22
by Tom W.
(1 comments  |  discussions )
I wish all my friends and all the people of the world a happy Thanksgiving. Let's all just be nice and love one another. hasta luego amigos and amigas Tommy    
(3 comments  |  discussions )
You probably won't hear anything in the news about this anniversary until the 50th is reached. However, I realized that it is significant in the fact that Kennedy was forty-six years old at the time of his death. For those who were alive and old en...
(0 comments  |  discussions )
With the opening of the 13th stargate (rose) on 11/11/11 and another 11/11/11 on 29 November I thought it appropriate to bring to the fore the 13th house of the Astrological Zodiac we are entering into on 30 November for 3 weeks or so.... accordingly...
Nov
21
(0 comments  |  discussions )
As a child, I often suffered the glooms in October and November. These were only lifted by the coming Advent season. The school plays, making decorations, Mum making her own Christmas puddings and most of all the preparation for the Carol Concert. Our...
by ze j.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
My niece Anne has been with her husband 7 years. They have tried to have children & have had numerous problems. Recently Anne found out she was pregnant. She had her hopes all up & early this week was told she had lost the baby. She was upset,...


MORE MEMBER BLOGS
Nov 23
Blog: Microfilm Conversion by Alex J.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — Pressmart help you bring your existing microfilm archives to digital publications. It has a collective experience of digitally archiving over 400 yrs of archives from microfilm, microfiche, newsprint & PDF formats for leading worldwide publishing ... more
Blog: Car Shipping by Magicboy M.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — No Hassle Instant Auto Transport Quote Online (24/7), Exceptional Service, Great Rates: Priority or Economy & Guaranteed Options: Nationwide Car Shipping more
Blog: Mayor Fraud by Lillian D.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — Just go Why the mayor should step down by Metro Times staff2/27/2008 One political observer used to tell people Kilpatrick could be mayor as long as he wanted. Now he's not so sure.   Kilpatrick's accomplishments make his fall fr... more
Blog: The real danger behind the H1N1 virus by Team O.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — http://www.heise.de/tp/r4 /artikel/31/31549/1.htmlh ttp://freepage.twoday.net /search?q=H1N1http://free page.twoday.net/search?q= swine+fluhttp://freepage. twoday.net/search?q=vacci nhttp://freepage.twoday.n et/search?q=John+Horvath more
Blog: Datenklau by Team O.
(0 comments  |  0 discussions ) — Weil ihnen die Argumente ausgehen, müssen Industrielobbyisten und ihre Fangemeinde private Daten klauen, um die große "Verschwörun g" der Klimawissenschaftler aufzudecken.http://www.he ise.de/tp/blogs/2/146602h tt... more
 
Content and comments expressed here are the opinions of Care2 users and not necessarily that of Care2.com or its affiliates.
Copyright © 2009 Care2.com, inc. and its licensors. All rights reserved