Laughter is one of the best medicines, so laugh a little.
God & Satan In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14. So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food." God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds. Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds. God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest. God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. Then Satan created HMOs.
Visibility:
Everyone
Posted: Saturday May 31, 2008, 4:38 pm Tags: funnyhealth
Propane Tanks - SAFETY
ALERT For Grilling
Propane Tanks - SAFETY
ALERT For Grilling
Health &
Wellness (tags:
)
Rabbit -
4 minutes ago
The brass valve in a
prop...
Natural Fibromyalgia
Treatment Gets Better,
Faster ResultsThere are
many, including doctors,
who have questioned
whether fibromyalgia is a
valid illness, but
don't tell that to
the few million who
suffer from otherwise
inexplicable pain. To
them, ...
Senator McCain,
Reject Hagee - Sign the
Petition
Rabbit Sign the
Petition - "John
Hagee continues to blame
the people of New Orleans
for the catastrophe of
Katrina. Senator McCain:
If you reject intolerance
and bigo...
Dear Healthcare-NOW!
Supporter:
Dozens of people held a
sit-in at Senator
Lieberman's Capitol Hill
office this morning
to demand that Senator
Lieberman pledge to stop
taking health insurance
company campaign
contributions and free up
funds so...
For the World March for
Peace and Nonviolence,
the largest human peace
sign in the world was
performed in Lucena,
Philippines, by 12,000
students of the QUEZON
NATIONAL HIGH SCHOOL on
October 7th, 2009.
Video:http://www.youtube.
com/watch?v=TOhRQa...
In a matter of hours, the
House of Representatives
will vote on the issue of
abortion in the new
health system.
Congress is set to vote
on abortion in the new
health system TODAY.
We can’t let the
anti-choice movement win,
because wom...
Pentagon resumes
experimentalvaccine
testing on US troops
video:http://www.youtube.
com/watch?v=jSL6cd6aOs8&a
mp;feature=player_embedde
d
Also featured on
Brasscheck
http://www.brasschecktv.c
om/page/16.html
Please note
associated Care2 news
story
at; http://www.care2
.com/news/member/97985269
5/1293642
Thanks :)
By Dr. Russell Blaylock
MD
"I have been following
the evolving
“pandemic” of
H1N1 influenza beginning
w...
Message: daily Bible verse by Ingrid F.
(0 comments
|
discussions
)
— Therefore we do not lose
heart. Though outwardly
we are wasting away, yet
inwardly we are being
renewed day by day. For
our light and momentary
troubles are achieving
for us an eternal glory
that far outweighs them
all. So we fix our eyes
not on what ... more
Message: princess of feeling by Hayam R.
(0 comments
|
discussions
)
— Hello friends i love all
the people and i want to
make close friends from
all over the world please
eny body sees my message
send me and i will be
very helpful and i will
be your real friend more
Message: Intensive farming in Africa ? by Wassyla D.
(0 comments
|
discussions
)
—
I'm quite upset after
reading this :
http://senemag.free.fr/sp
ip.php?article637.
It's in french, but can
be easily translated
(I've already worked on
it, my mother language is
french but I try to do my
best in english.).
Already poor peopole are
de... more
Nov 7
Message: autonomously is the gift of reverie for you by John S.
(0 comments
|
0 discussions
)
— 091107 23:23The measure
of meaning & value in
life cannot be measured
in treasury=monetary
terms. Or the fear of
loss against profit:
Pleasure & Leisure
for 1% at the expense of
the 99%. Since it is in
giving that we receive
more the perfect e... more
Content and comments expressed here are the opinions of Care2 users and not necessarily that of Care2.com or its affiliates.