Alert: Planned Site Outage Tonight: Tue. July 28th, 9pm-Midnight PST
my care2
make a difference

community

shares

share your passions, stories, inspirations, and more

May 31, 2008

Laughter is one of the best medicines, so laugh a little.

God & Satan In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14. So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food." God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds. Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds. God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest. God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. Then Satan created HMOs.
Visibility: Everyone
Posted: Saturday May 31, 2008, 4:38 pm
Tags: funny health

Group Discussions start a discussion
Comments
Or, log in with your
Facebook account:
Compose your comment and submit:




littlewing L. (77)
Saturday October 3, 2009, 1:17 pm
You Nailed it Rabbit

Author

Rabbit R.
Author Tools:
Compose New Share
female, age 43, single
Columbia, WA, USA
RABBIT'S SHARES
Jun
12
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Propane Tanks - SAFETY ALERT For Grilling Propane Tanks - SAFETY ALERT For Grilling Health & Wellness (tags: ) Rabbit - 4 minutes ago The brass valve in a prop...
(3 comments  |  discussions )
Natural Fibromyalgia Treatment Gets Better, Faster ResultsThere are many, including doctors, who have questioned whether fibromyalgia is a valid illness, but don't tell that to the few million who suffer from otherwise inexplicable pain. To them, ...
Apr
24
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Senator McCain, Reject Hagee - Sign the Petition Rabbit Sign the Petition - "John Hagee continues to blame the people of New Orleans for the catastrophe of Katrina. Senator McCain: If you reject intolerance and bigo...


SHARES FROM RABBIT'S NETWORK
Nov
8
by Road L.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Dear Healthcare-NOW! Supporter: Dozens of people held a sit-in at Senator Lieberman's Capitol Hill office this morning to demand that Senator Lieberman pledge to stop taking health insurance company campaign contributions and free up funds so...
Nov
7
by Road L.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
For the World March for Peace and Nonviolence, the largest human peace sign in the world was performed in Lucena, Philippines, by 12,000 students of the QUEZON NATIONAL HIGH SCHOOL on October 7th, 2009. Video:http://www.youtube. com/watch?v=TOhRQa...
by Road L.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
  In a matter of hours, the House of Representatives will vote on the issue of abortion in the new health system. Congress is set to vote on abortion in the new health system TODAY. We can’t let the anti-choice movement win, because wom...
Nov
4
by Road L.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
Pentagon resumes experimentalvaccine testing on US troops video:http://www.youtube. com/watch?v=jSL6cd6aOs8&a mp;feature=player_embedde d Also featured on Brasscheck http://www.brasschecktv.c om/page/16.html
Nov
3
by Road L.
(0 comments  |  discussions )
 Please note associated Care2 news story at; http://www.care2 .com/news/member/97985269 5/1293642 Thanks :)   By Dr. Russell Blaylock MD  "I have been following the evolving “pandemic” of H1N1 influenza beginning w...


MORE MESSAGE
Nov 8
Message: daily Bible verse by Ingrid F.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what ... more
Message: thanks for the heads up on the "netfirstplatinum by Barbara P.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — i would have been stuck if it was't for 345879625 thanks again111 more
Message: princess of feeling by Hayam R.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — Hello friends i love all the people and i want to make close friends from all over the world please eny body sees my message send me and i will be very helpful and i will be your real friend more
Message: Intensive farming in Africa ? by Wassyla D.
(0 comments  |  discussions ) — I'm quite upset after reading this : http://senemag.free.fr/sp ip.php?article637. It's in french, but can be easily translated (I've already worked on it, my mother language is french but I try to do my best in english.). Already poor peopole are de... more
Nov 7
Message: autonomously is the gift of reverie for you by John S.
(0 comments  |  0 discussions ) — 091107 23:23The measure of meaning & value in life cannot be measured in treasury=monetary terms. Or the fear of loss against profit: Pleasure & Leisure for 1% at the expense of the 99%. Since it is in giving that we receive more the perfect e... more
 
Content and comments expressed here are the opinions of Care2 users and not necessarily that of Care2.com or its affiliates.
Copyright © 2009 Care2.com, inc. and its licensors. All rights reserved