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Conditioning
Nov 29, 2005
Conditioning


The young girl watched as her mother prepared a ham for the family dinner.

A sprinkling of herbs, garlic, coriander and some other‘secret family’ ingredients were applied. 

Then, just before her mother placed the ham into the roasting pan, she watched her take a large, sharp kitchen knife and cut off the end of the ham and set it aside. She placed the ham into the pan, put the lid on the pan and lovingly placed it into the pre-heated oven.

She set the oven timer and turned, smiling to her daughter.

‘There,’ she stated, matter-of-factly, ‘Now you know how to make the family ham, just as we have for generations. When you have your own family, you’ll be able to do it that way too!’

The little girl was thoughtful, pensive. Her mother was curious. ‘What are you thinking, dear?’ She asked her daughter. ‘Well,’ answered the girl, ‘I was just wondering, why did you cut the end off of the ham before you put it into the pan? Didn’t you tell me it was wrong to waste food?’

‘That’s true,’ her mother said, ‘But this is how our family has prepared our ham for some time now, so it’s how it’s done!’

The girl persisted, ’Is that part of the ham bad? Why do we cut it away like that?’ The mother stated, matter-of-factly; ‘That is how MY mother taught me, dear, so that is how we do it!’

‘I don’t understand.’ Was all the little girl could think of to say.

‘Look,’ replied her mother, becoming slightly agitated, ‘I have an idea. Why don’t you go into the living room and telephone your Granny and ask her? I’m sure she would be happy to tell you! I have to get the dessert ready now.’

The young girl took her mother’s suggestion to heart and did just that.

‘Granny, I was watching mother roast a ham the ‘family’ way, and I was wondering why did you teach her to cut the end off of the ham before roasting it. Isn’t it wrong to waste food?’

‘Well,’ replied her grandmother, ‘I never questioned my mother on that, and you shouldn’t question yours! That is the way my mother, your Great Granny, taught me, so that is how we do it in our family!’ Granny was a little bit ‘testy’ these days. Her arthritis may have been partially responsible for this, the little girl thought to herself. ‘Do you understand?’ Granny asked the girl.

‘Well,’ replied the youngster, quietly, ‘I don’t…really.’

Granny had a suggestion. ‘Why don’t you telephone your Great Granny in the retirement home? Ask her. I’m sure she’d love to hear from you.’ Granny’s voice was sweet again, as if to make up for her impatient response.

The little girl did just that. Great Granny was quite ancient, of course, but she had most of her faculties - as far as conversation went.

‘Great Granny,’ asked the young girl, ‘why did you teach my granny to cut the end off of the ham before you placed it in the pan?’

There was a long pause at the other end of the line, interspersed with the sounds of breathing that was not as easy as it used to be. Then, a cackling, hoarse laughter came with the answer; ‘Because,’ said Great Granny, ‘the damn pan was too small!’

The little girl understood.


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Posted: Nov 29, 2005 11:00am

 
 
 
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Author

Wayne Wilson
male, age 64, married
Victoria, British Columbia, Canada
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