Ive been wanting and meaning to write many of you back..My dear friends I want you to all know how much you mean to me and how thankful I am to have you all as friends. Your words of love, support, and encouragement have been such a blessing to me.
I filed for divorce on August 8th, Cesar had already signed the paperwork the previous week and we had it all notarized on the 7th. As far as the legal part of it, everything is great! I get to keep my house, car, possessions, my annuities and have sole custody of the children. He waived his right to appear in court; so when the hearing date comes I will be the only one there. That was the easy part.
The hard part has been Cesar. I told him on July 28th and he stayed in the house until the 7th. During that week he was loving, caring, and doing as many things with us as possible; however its a little too late. Then while John was here, his loving and sadness turned into a more volatile behavior. He loves me, he hates mehe would call all hours of the day and night..yelling or begging..texting me with all kinds of comments and did something that was unforgivable.
Since John has been gone, we are doing better..he is acting more like an adult and talking to the kids and trying to spend time with them. I told him that on week days he can see them from 5pm to 6:30..and then have them every other weekend. However, he just wants them during the days on his weekends until he gets his own place and that is okay with me.
The boys are doing well. They are happy and seem to really not notice a difference. Julian is enjoying the first grade and yesterday brought some of his school work home (math) and had 100% on it and I was very proud. He told me he has one friend he knows in the classroom and that he likes his teacher. However, he misses Mrs. Fitch (his Kinder teacher). Giovanni misses Julian and is constantly asking me to go get him.
Other than that, my car mirrors were stolen in front of Club Montrose Saturday night and then on Tuesday, when I went to get them replaced I got hit by a rock on the windshield the size of a half dollarTuesday was my low day and I felt that everything was going wrong and that I shouldnt have gotten out of bed.
Today I feel much better and I remind myself of all of the good things to come:
Going back to college
Mom and John moving here
I am a strong intelligent woman and I have been through worse and I know that everything will be fine. I just need to keep my head up and persevere. This is a new start for me in my life and I may have a few mood swings here and there and I know I am in a funk, but the end of the rainbow will be coming soon and I cant wait to get that pot of gold..it REALLY exists ya know and I am happy to know that things are finally going to work out for me.
Thank you for all of your love and support! I will continue to keep all of you posted.
I am online.....just haven't been as active......not sure what I should say and sometimes I lack the will to type......
I never thought much about the 4th of July growing up, except what cool fireworks I can get and whether or not they had my friendship pagoda. But, after marrying Cesar and enduring his service in Iraq.....well I appreciate in a much different way. We celebrate America's Birthday, because we celebrate our seperation from other governments and we celebrate our freedom that people died for to pave our way......now I won't get into all that, because everyone has different views and my momma always taught me that religion and politics are discussions we just don't have.
But, no matter what your view point is.....I hope you have a wonderful 4th of July.....full of happiness, good food, laughter and friends......may you enjoy your fireworks and your celebration of freedom in your own way and know that you have a friend in McAllen, Texas thinking of you on this day.
A lil 4th of July History that I researched and found this article:
What Does July 4th Really Mean?
Yorktown, Thomas Nelson Jr, noted that the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson home for his headquarters. He quietly urged General George Washington to open fire. The home was destroyed, and Nelson died bankrupt.
Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed. The enemy jailed his wife, and she died within a few months.
John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she was dying. Their 13 children fled for their lives. His fields and his gristmill were laid to waste. For more than a year he lived in forests and caves, returning home to find his wife dead and his children vanished. A few weeks later he died from exhaustion and a broken heart.
Norris and Livingston suffered similar fates. Such were the stories and sacrifices of the American Revolution. These were not wild-eyed, rabble-rousing ruffians. They were soft-spoken men of means and education. They had security, but they valued liberty more. Standing tall, straight, and unwavering, they pledged: "For the support of this declaration, with firm reliance on the protection of divine providence, we mutually pledge to each other, our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor."
They gave you and me a free and independent America. The history books never told you a lot about what happened in the Revolutionary War. We didn't fight just the British. We were British subjects at that time and we fought our own government!
Some of us take these liberties so much for granted, but we shouldn't. So, take a few minutes this year while enjoying your 4th of July holiday and silently thank these patriots. It's not much to ask for the price they paid. Remember: freedom is never free!
My life seems to be a series of experiences, like as if I have been through almost everything. I know that my job in life is to share theses experiences with others, but how. How do you become a speaker? How do you help others and since I haven't been to jail or crippled; why would anyone want to choose me? I come from a divorced family, I have been raped, I have been molested, I have family in Germany, went through an alcoholic/abusive family, was married three times (once to a prisoner, to an abusive, lying, cheating...gave me ghonarhea during my pregnancy...drug addict, and now currently an Iraq war veteran who is an alcoholic...who adopted my oldest son and treats him differently), I have dealt with a 2 month premature baby, 2 c-sections (and was told had I given a v-bac I would've died), stayed home alone with a two month old and a 3 yr old in a town where I knew no one (in Louisiana) for a whole year while Cesar was in Iraq and had post-partum depression, most of my relatives are deceased (9 friends and family in 3yrs), Found my father dead, did almost every drug out there, traveled the world (most of it anyhow), my house was robbed, worked 3 jobs and couldn't pay bills....lived on Ramen, dealt with severe depression and was an out-patient (they wanted me to be an in-patient, but who would take care of my son).....I know there is more; but at this moment I can't think....my stomach hurts.....oh ya I went from 199lbs to 132lbs in a year. I'm a shopaholic....which is hard and I love to photograph things, but now that I live in Texas and not Cali anymore I don't have much to photograph. Right now I am suffering in a marriage that I need more love in and less pain.....He makes me relive not only our past, but my past and I need more than that and I know eventually I will leave......I'm just not too sure when.... I want to help others survive....because I am a survivor. Yes, I've tried to take my own life many times, but I could never hurt the ones I love and after having children I knew I could never do that to them. Being a part of a divorced family I know what abandonment is like and I would never want that on them. Many say I should write a book, but about what? That I have slept with over 64 people and had over 100 relationships? or that I am now a stay at home mom that is bored out of her mind? Maybe, my new belief system that deals with Novus Spiritus and how I am thankful for Sylvia Browne being in my life....where 4 years ago I tried reading her and decided that she was out there and I couldn't believe in that and here I am now a TRUE BELIEVER.....and this is before I ever knew about the DaVinci Code book or Movie. I know I am here to help.....but, how?
I hope this isn't intruding or improper.......if so, you can delete this thread and I will not be offended.
This is kinda a poll for the memembers......I have a local Study Group here in McAllen, Texas and I want to spread as much light as possible of Sylvia's word......if you are interested in studying with us and being a part of Novus Spiritus let me know and we can start an online study group.
I will give more details to those who are interested.....
I just have this buzz in my head and heart and I REALLY want to get the word out to people and I can't explain how much the desire to do this is there.
I love this group and the people here......all of you are wonderful and I just wanted to share this idea with all of you! I hope some of you are as excited as I am about it!
My plan is ordering the study books and mailing them to whoever is interested. Then also getting copies of the CD sermons and lectures and sending them to the members as well.
Then on the site (which would be a closed group) would be the Novus Newsletter, the Novus Opening, closing and healing prayers, the study guide questions, a thread for questions for me to send back to the Novus Liason, a petition thread and other pertinent information.
This way for those of you who do not have a study group in your area, or are not able to travel to it, or maybe prefer solitary studying.......I think this would be a good way to go and spread the word of Mother and Father God.......the truth and light and love......
I hope I can find people to share this "Journey of the Soul" with me.
The Journey of the Soul series (not the same as the one in the bookstore) is a softcover spiral book $25 (this is not on a monthly basis; but is how we go through it......).
I will only charge you for the book you need at the time.......$1.00 per CD
Plus shipping (roughly I assume to be $3 when getting the book and possibly $2.00 if it is just the cd's)
All the paperwork, newsletters and other information and threads......questions for the liason and etc and of course discussions on what was read and learned will be on the group page.
I will not be charging monthly dues.
I will only charge for the book as needed.....the liason said some people can be on the same book for months and others will zip through it......so that depends on the group.
$1 per cd (there are 2 monthly)
$25 per book (I would average it to be around one book every 2 months)
I will keep as much info as possible on the site and of course help in any way I can.
I already started setting it up......I had added some things that I had made threads on in another group, but I cleaned it up and fixed the mistakes. I still need to work on it some more, but I think it will turn out REALLY GREAT!!!!
DAMN TELEMARKETERS!!!! Here is how to stop the calls
Just a reminder to all of you cell phone owners....April 1st all cell phone numbers are being released to telemarketing companies and you will start to receive sale calls. *YOU WILL BE CHARGED FOR THESE CALLS*.....To prevent this, call the following number from your cell phone:
*1-888-382-1222. It is the National DO NOT CALL list. You must call this number from the phone you want blocked. It will only take a minute of your time. It blocks your number for five (5) years.
Wow! I can't believe how fast time has gone by. Julian is on Spring Break....tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day and soon it will be Easter.
Life seems to be crzay at times, like when I did my taxes........But, all in all, I can't complain. Since the new year:
Julian has lost two teeth, is starting tutoring at the Sylvan Learning Center and will start Karate next week.
Giovanni, turned three and the boys recently took pictures at the Ranson Studio, with an indoor pond and baby ducklings. Giovanni is still an avid fan of Thomas the Train, but we have a new love.......Jay Jay the Jet Plane. He is still going to Gymboree, which he loves, and so far have been to a few Gymboree birthday parties and the Valentine's day party.
Cesar is working for Fesco, which is a company that test for oil and equipment needs on the oil rigs. He likes his new job, but is still awaiting news from the Border Patrol. He tested again and passed the test, interview and physical.......now we are waiting for the job offer. If he gets it, he will go to New Mexico for training......a 5 month term. He still plays poker, but not as often. He has been recently, after getting off of work, been building a wooden treehouse/playset. This structure is massive, like the Rainbow Playsets. The boys can't wait and he hopes to finish it tonight. I know Julian wants to enjoy that before his Spring Break ends ha ha
Myself......well, what can I say? I have been doing a SMASHING job of being a Domestic Engineer. I bought the Magic Eraser Mop and I am in love lol Forget Swiffer.......GO MR CLEAN! Outside of that it's been the same old mommy stuff as usual. However, I have become an avid Scrapbooker......I know....I've been one for the last 3 yrs.....but, I took a break for a year and now I'm back. I became a consultant again just VERY recently ha ha ha
There was a free watch with it and it comes in different color bands to change with (which are all the colors of the albums they sell).....so I decided to go for it. I had my first party, it was small.......but it was a lot of fun and I have possible customers (an all time first for me!). I also, have recently got in contact to two people this year that I haven't spoke to in YEARS......Tammie Ruznic (McCoy) and Gina Pilch (Carrera). It made my day talking to these to women. Tammie was my bestfriend from @Kindergarten up to Middle School and Gina, I met her my Freshman year (in a way I will NEVER forget) and lost contact in 2002. What a blessing! I even had a reading with Sylvia Browne and have read over 8 of her books. I love that woman! I am also at 139lbs and I am working to get to 130.....maybe 125.....my goal is 120lbs, but I don't expect to there; I do figure that, that will give me the drive and desire to work harder to attain it. It has made me very happy and proud of myself and I can honestly tell you that I am the healthiest I have ever been!
As for the rest......we had a fabulous Mardi Gras party.....invited our newest neighbor's the Lubking's. They are from Shreveport/Bossier City, Louisiana. No joke! They are really cool people and Phoebe is a Creative Memories addict.......go figure. We had a lot of great food....Gumbo, Janbalaya, red beans, deep fried Catfish, and a King Cake.
We also have made a few trips to Progresso for Tacos and Giovanni's Thomas the Train Pinata. That was another great party.
Jessie and I did an 80's photo, so if you want to see blue eyeshadow and a wall of hair check out our website.
We also went to the Jr FFA and the boys rode on a horse, watched the pigs run around and made friends with some goats. This weekend we will be going to another livestock show, but they also have concerts playing, and carnival rides.
We also can't wait to hit South Padre Island....We've been wanting to go, but the last week has been overcast and now Spring breakers.....but, soon. Maybe we will go to Fiesta Texas (Six Flags), Sea World or Schlitterbahn.....no cruise this year. Cesar's new job doesn't give you vacation until after a year of service. But, we bought a pop up pool, you may laugh but it is HOT here.
That's it, but I bet it was enough! Take care everyone....we miss you and love you all so VERY much!
Northern California Beach
Reading 500 CPM on
12/20/2013 - Fukushima
Radiation Is Here. Via @
From Rense; "The above
video was taken today
with an Inspector Plus
Geiger counter by 'Dave',
giving readings on a
1. Go to a peaceful,
serene spot that you feel
most calm in. It must be
quiet and free of
clutter. 2. Close your
eyes and get into a
position. Take six deep
breaths with a count of
six seconds on the inhale
through the nose and
According to wiki; "A
classic staple of science
fiction and superhero
is matter composed
subatomic particles that
have mostly exactly the
same properties (mass,
intrinsic angular mo...
Beginning in the 1950s,
American and Soviet
scientists engaged in a
dangerous race to see who
could build and detonate
the world's largest bomb.
In the Soviet Union,
Andrei Sakharov was the
architect of this
According to the movie,
According to NIRS;
"Marine life in all
forms, from endangered
manatees and sea turtles
to essential microscopic
organisms, is being
harmed and killed by
systems, used to remove
waste heat at nuclear
3/18/11: "The source term
provided to NARAC was:
(1) 25% of the total fuel
in unit 2 (SFP) released
to the atmosphere, (2)
50% of the total spent
fuel from unit 3 (SFP)
was released to the
atmosphere, and (3) 100%
of the total spent fuel
This meditation uses
words, images, and
feelings to evoke a
oneself and others. With
each recitation of the
phrases, we are
expressing an intention,
planting the seeds of
loving wishes over and
over in our heart...
To cultivate compassion,
let yourself sit in a
centered and quiet way.
In this traditional form
of practice you will
combine a repeated inner
visualization and the
evocation of the feeling
of compassion. As you
first sit, breathe
Every nuclear reactor
is a military industrial
complex stocked up with
1300 weapons of mass
destruction that if
released for ANY reason,
can wipe out all life on
the planet, from just ONE
nuclear reactor. If a
Carrington Event happens,
ect.org A nuclear
workers at Fukushima to
cover their dosimeters
with lead to lower
official levels of
radiation would be
workers to work longer
hours inside the plant.