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Jan 4, 2010
Ms. Terri Sanvicente's Memorial Service:
Saturday, February 27, 2010 @ 2:30 p.m.
North Oaks Baptist Church
18411 Stuebner Airline Rd.
Spring, Texas 77379, United States
Phone: 281-370-4060

You can help pick up the pieces
(story below) 

If you would like to help the children,
Walgreens has set up a fund.    

The Terri Sanvicente Childrens Benefit Fund
Walgreens
2808 North Gessner
Houston, Texas 77080           
713-460-0535

I am waiting on Pay/Pal account info. 

There is a hold up about non profit status

for getting the Pay/Pal account opened.

Soon as this matter is straightened out I will inform everyone.

Thank you for all your patience.
 
'Killing Terri ... Was My Only Option' (UPDATE!)
- 1 day ago - chron.com

Terri Sanvicente, beaten to death with a
crowbar on Christmas Eve,
had three children with Jason Bouchard.
"She was always afraid of what he was
going to do next," one of her lawyers said.
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Posted: Jan 4, 2010 3:02am
Jul 5, 2008
mimicook says:
I never thought of myself as a Cougar but my husband and I just celebrated our 22 wedding anniversary . Our age difference of 23 years has never been a issue , His energy and lack of personal relationships were only one of my turnons toward him. He pursued me not the other way around so I dont really consider myself as being a Cougar since i didnt stalk him. mimi
Posted: March 8, 2008 6:09AM EST
ianandrew says:
Cougar Huh! I just heard this term the other day. My husband said a gal at his work said "Oh that's right your wife is a cougar" He laughed and I said a what? Well now I know I was hip before it was hip to be a cougar. My second marriage is to a wonderful man 15 1/2 years younger than myself. We met at work when he was 18 and I was 33. We dated for 3 years and have now been married 15 fun and wonderful years. He said he was always attracted to older women. He "chased me" not the other way around. I wonder what the term is for younger men who chase older women?
My husband is wise beyond his years. He is a wonderful listener and he tells me every day how sexy and beautiful I am. What more could I want.
Posted: March 8, 2008 1:48AM EST
lindapg27 says:
Well, I never thought of myself as a "cougar" because I've been with the same guy for 18 years. We have a 17 year old daughter and finally realized we weren't going anywhere. We married about five years ago. How we met might put me in the "cougar" category. I was 35 and he was 24. They said it would never last. I was "in love" with someone else closer to my own age, but he didn't want a family so I could have my cake and eat it, too. I dated, came out of my shell, lost weight and met my guy at a dimly lit pub in 1989. Long hair, one eye peeking out and a bowl hat. His "eye" met mine and well, there's more, but..he just never left. Younger guys seemed to gravitate to me as well. I was really kind of shy. It's possible that we're still together because we found God together. I now believe there are no accidents. I really think these are the issues of our generation. Thanks for the opportunity to express. - Lind****
Posted: March 8, 2008 1:08AM EST
cmoser5152 says:
Please. . . there are several young men who refer to me as "the Cougar" and I take it as quite a compliment. . .as long as they are careful with MILF!
Posted: March 7, 2008 11:53PM EST
gwynnoak says:
I don't have a problem with being called a "cougar". What I have found, is that men my age have chronic and acute health problems and are looking for a nurse. It has been my experience that they are set in their ways, refuse to participate in new activities and carry a lot of baggage. Hooray for seeing a younger guy if you want to have fun and someone to participate in activities with you. I am going to seriously consider a younger man, even if my kids don't approve.
Posted: March 7, 2008 9:36PM EST
Shirlene says:
I am shocked that AARP has now taken to calling women "cougars" too. Are cougar women supposed to attack and kill men too? Shame on you for going along with this instead of discussing the issues.
Posted: March 7, 2008 8:52PM EST
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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 6:10am
Jul 5, 2008
KURT-1957 says:
Interesting. I seem to be the only guy posting on this article.I don't know, Been married twice, one when I was rather young and not knowing what I was getting into and the other in 1990 which was rather sad to have fall apart since I had two stepchildren. It was a good situation
but my job just got too stressful. Its been hard to find someone at my age of 50.I've really not been involved seriously for a while. Women my age still seem to want to be totally taken care of and provided for. Really, I'd just like someone to be with and have some fun and some companionship. If it lead to something more committed, wonderful. Most women I have been at all connected in the past six years with just seem to take advantage of my good nature and I end up feeling used. Frustrating. I'm age 50 I have no problem dating a lady older than me if we get along and she actually cared for me. Men give up finding that pretty fast if they have had bad experiences. Some get as bitter as some women do at times. I would be happy with just a good friend. If it led too more, great, but its hard to go looking for that. Perhaps an older lady would be more appreciative and inclined to just be good friends for a while and not need to look for Mr.Perfect and their fantasy guy which some women seem to need, even if their chances are very slim of finding him. It's hard for me to find a two-way supportive relationship.
Posted: March 9, 2008 4:51AM EDT
susieque says:
My goodness -- something I've always done is trendy! I can't for the life of me understand why a man of my age isn't interested in women of my age (60), unless it's because we 'women of a certain age' are smarter than the young girls and much less 'moldable'. These guys may still want a woman who won't question them and will adore everything they say and do. BS. Have you looked at the online personals? These guys submit a photo of themselves, sitting in a boat, wearing a 'feed' cap, holding up a fish. For God's sake -- are they looking for a fishin' buddy or an interestingwoman to have the time of their life with??
I, too, find most men in my age group are set in their ways and are afraid of anything new, such as food, music, and activities, especially those in bed.
Can't say I like the referral to 'Cougar', as it sounds a bit predatory to me.
Posted: March 8, 2008 8:37PM EST
willowyndo says:
Through my experiences I have found that men our age are generally too set in their ways, too rigid in their habits, and not willing to think out of the box. They refuse to 'let us in', and are the masters of head games. Of course there are exceptions. I find myself a bit bemused that younger men are attracted to me. I am overweight, and though I have a 'pretty face' I am really not all that. However, that does not deter them. At first I fought it...I found it creepy myself. I felt like I was doing something illegal! Mind you, they have been in their early twenties through early forties, while I am 54, so I was not committing a crime Finally, I simply accepted the fact that this is my 'market niche' (without the exchange of money, just to be clear) so to speak and decided to enjoy it. Perhaps some day I will even find The One, be he my age or younger. In the meantime, I adore the young ones. They are like a breath of fresh air.
Posted: March 8, 2008 7:32PM EST
bearmisty says:
Ditto gwynnoak "What I have found, is that men my age have chronic and acute health problems and are looking for a nurse. It has been my experience that they are set in their ways, refuse to participate in new activities." My second marriage was to a man only a year younger, but appeared younger. I was a little embarr****ed by that, but we were good friends and surprised when more developed. He was very set in his ways and determined to advise me that I should be doing things the "right" way. When that marriage ended I was done. I figured any man the traditional "older" would have more ailments than my former husband and a longer list of the "right" way to do things. For four years I was "DONE" with men. I finally decided to at least be polite to them and started becoming friends to a young man. When he started leaning toward relationship I didn't take it seriously, though I really enjoyed his company. At some point I came to realize that he is a very special person and he constantly surprises me by his appreciation of who I am and always expressing that appreciation saying what things he enjoys about me. He likes the same thing about me...that I have the confidence and maturity to allow him any mistakes (don't want him harping on mine) and don't feel I have to make any demands about how I wish he was different toward me. Whiny and demanding women are not very attractive. He says I don't fit the definition because he is less than 15 years younger and he pursued. Also, it was pointed out to me by others that I was the only one concerned about it. People around me were already doing it, including both my children.
Posted: March 8, 2008 7:17PM EST
LSMilburn says:
I am married to a man who is 18 - 19 years younger than I, and while originally I had all the fears possible about how such a relationship can work. But by ignoring the media, and following my own heart, it seems the only people who have problems are the ones that I could care less about. Our family and friends are nothing but overjoyed by the changes are relationship has brought both of us. I choose not to dwell on issues as the arise due to our age. We have made a committment and as long as the communication channels remain open, I am confident that we can come over any obstacles that we may face. He is my soulmate, as I am his. And life is hard.....one must truly grab and cherish any happiness they can find. This man is my best friend, and my priority. Life is as good as it gets!
Posted: March 8, 2008 4:11PM EST
susanm719 says:
I've been in a committed relationship with a man 16 years my junior for over 6 years, and it's working out just fine. He's more mature and less needy than many men my own age (62). Sometimes I feel the age difference though; he was only 2 years old when JFK was shot!
Posted: March 8, 2008 3:48PM EST
marimom says:
I was a cougar in the 70's. Yes, I am way ahead of my time. Also got my tatoo in the 70's for my 40th birthday.
Posted: March 8, 2008 1:58PM EST
Jackieann says:
I like the idea of Cougars. Being in my late fifties I use to think going with a younger man was not proper. Now I am willing and ready. I can love a young man just as well an older one. The ****le of Cougar is all in the way you look at it. I believe a cougar goes after what it wants. Not just kill and attack. It is just a name.
Posted: March 8, 2008 11:48AM EST
tdm1954 says:
I think the article is great! I now understand why I enjoy wearing the animal prints. I am becoming a Cougar! I used to believe that younger men were a waste of my time, but am slowly warming to the benefits of such relationships. I have no thoughts on attacking or killing a man, but to devour him with love is something I could wrap my arms...and legs around! Thanks for opening my eyes to the truth.
Posted: March 8, 2008 11:14AM EST
gringa44 says:
YES, YES, YES! There is a limitless supply of 20 somethings who will adore an older woman, even one like me who is fat and not attractive. That confidence we have is the best aphrodesiac. I personally get bored after a few weeks and move on but the darlings do generally want longer term relationships, so if thats what you need, its there. I'm just finished with 2 mos with "Christian", over 40 years younger. He did help me so much-he held my coat when I worked out at the gym and put my ear rings in for me. Two subjects unmentioned: money and sex. I prefer no money going in either direction, it is OK to pick up some tabs when we obviously have more than they do but they are not hanging out with me for the money. And the big one, sex. For heavens sake the beauty of the young is awesome! (and even the virgins are strangely competent.) I have probably 8 or 12 new lovers a year and many returns; its never a good day if I am not propositioned before lunch! At 64 I kinda wonder if I will have this kind of good luck at 74...judy
Posted: March 8, 2008 7:23AM EST
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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 6:02am
Jul 5, 2008
summerbookwormbeach-I seem to have attracted younger men for a long time. The one who was the youngest compared to me was 45 when I was 58. I am now 72 and married my now 65 year old husband 8 1/2 years ago after a year of living together. These are only 2 of about a dozen men who seemed genuinely surprised when they found out that I was older than they. Always have felt more at home with younger people in general, including my daughter (born when I was 20) and her husband, 2 of my best friends.
Posted: March 14, 2008 3:49PM EDT
poetess073 says:
I am 53 and am dating a man 39. He came after me. We have been dating for over 2 years now. But it is the man not his age I am interested in. He treats me with respect. It is the man that is important not his age. I met him in a chat room. I have met 5 men in person I have chatted with online. Some were older, some younger. I like him for the person he is. I was concerned about his age, but he was not about mine. I think the term "cougar" is offensive. A cougar is by nature a carnivore who preys on other animals and I am certainly no preying on anyone. The men I date are mature and know what they want and what they are doing. We don't have a term for men who date younger women, so why a term for older women who date younger men? The old double standard rears it's ugly head- again!
Posted: March 12, 2008 2:37PM EDT
lilcougar says:
a little of 3 years ago, in one of my chat rooms, I was called a cougar. Ironically enough, the next morning on the radio I heard the term explained. I was driving to work, and laughing. It's true. I even changed my nick to "lilcougar". My first husband was 3 years older than me. I was 19, he 22 when we met. We had a child together, I had two children in the house. When we divorced, it wasn't intentional, but I wound up dating guys at least 5 years younger. My second husband was 8 years younger. For some reason I just get along better with the younger men. Maybe it's because I haven't quite "grown up" myself, though I am independent. I don't own my own company, I'm not a manager, president or anything else. I don't have my own home, I rent an apartment. I like most kinds of music, but most of all, I can listen, and be supportive of these guys. They have nothing to "prove" to me. I say Rock On Cougars. I for one like the name.
Posted: March 11, 2008 4:01PM EDT
PegPurdue says:
I am 51 and my husband is 33 ... We have been together for 15 years and could not be happier ... He chased me when we started courting and I thought he was nuts and would wake up to the "old lady" he was seeing one day and move on ... It took him almost ten years to convince me to marry (and it wasn't for financial reasons ... he makes a lot more than I do or ever will). But we laugh as he is the old soul in the relationship ... I am definitely the kid ... And for the record, my first husband was almost 10 years older than I ... and I left him because I was tired of taking care of him. I now have a relationship with a PARTNER in life ...
Posted: March 11, 2008 10:08AM EDT
I am 50 just having turned in January and have been lonely for the past 6 years, did not date or have friends that I can lean on for companionship, I decided one day to place a personal ad. Received numerous responses and to my surprise..younger men..I don't look 50 or feel 50 the majority of the men in this age group look much older with the problem of the fire burning but the flame is not as strong...Not our fault you did not take care of yourself...We the women that not only took care of the house, raised the kids, went to work, took care of the husbands and yet managed to look good for our age and feel good about ourselves. I say if you have it within you..flaunt it and enjoy it...what is the problem...men have done the same for ages....older men with younger women...the 7 year itch..We deserve to be happy and to enjoy the rest of our lives..here's to the women of today.....HURRAY FOR US. By the way I have a 30 year old who is persuing my heart...why..he was fed up with the younger ladies that did not know how to appreciate him.
Posted: March 10, 2008 11:05AM EDT
FrankinJax says:
Dirty Old Woman.
Posted: March 9, 2008 11:03PM EDT
FrankinJax says:
Submit a response to this article.
Posted: March 9, 2008 10:51PM EDT
FrankinJax says:
There is still a double standard. If it were a man in the older position, he will be call a pervert of dirty old man.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
Posted: March 9, 2008 10:35PM EDT
sexy60 says:
Grow up Shirlene, AARP are always discussing the issues and I think the topic of "cougars" is very interesting since I, I suppose, would be considered a "cougar" myself. I am constantly pursued by younger men who refuses to believe I am 60 and they are usually in their 30's and 40's. It's more fun than being pursued by older men belive me.
Posted: March 9, 2008 9:28PM EDT
howeyme53 says:
I had the pleasure of having a "Boy Toy" for about 3 years. He found me! I'm 53 and he was 25. I had only known men my age until then. He was gorgeous with muscles.He was like the ever ready bunny!!! No boring conversations (ex girlfriends or wives).No "wait a minute baby until I can get it up!".He didn't ask for anything from me!
Posted: March 9, 2008 6:06PM EDT
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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 5:58am
Jul 5, 2008
*Editor’s note: Names of some of the interviewees have been changed for privacy.

Annette Wheeler* didn’t recall the exact moment she first heard the term “cougar,” but she did remember dashing to her computer to look it up. To her shock and bemusement, there was a new term to describe what she had been doing most of her life—dating younger men.

Wheeler, a fiery redhead who lives outside Baltimore, leaned back in her chair and sighed. “I adore younger men,” the 60-year-old purred. “I liked younger guys even when I was in high school—like a year or two younger. I was a cougar before there were cougars.”

Indeed, Wheeler’s pre-marriage and post-divorce dating history reads like a steamy screenplay. She listed a string of young men with whom she had various relationships, occasionally punching numbers into a calculator to determine age differences she had never considered in the first place. She never analyzed her attraction to younger men (or their attraction to her), but with “cougar” an increasingly popular term used to describe older women dating significantly younger men, her longtime preference is suddenly in the spotlight.

For Wheeler and other women like her, younger men—many of them 15 years or more their juniors—are a natural fit. Boomer women are looking and feeling better than ever. Widowed, separated, or divorced, a growing number seek young men for dating and companionship. And since men have been dating younger women for ages, why are so many of us surprised—shocked, even—that women would follow suit?  

* * *

Valerie Gibson, author of “Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men,” is all too familiar with this double standard. The self-proclaimed cougar wrote her first book on the topic—“Younger Men: How to Find Them, Date Them, Mate Them, and Marry Them”—14 years ago, “and let me tell you something,” she said in a whisper. “It caused an awful stir—and not a good one. People were horrified. They were absolutely horrified that older women should be having sex with younger men.”  

When many of us think “cougar,” we picture the ultimate cougar of the big screen:  The Graduate’s legendary, martini-sipping Mrs. Robinson. These days, real-life cougars are stars like Demi Moore (who, in her 40s, married then-twenty-something heartthrob Ashton Kutcher), the coiffed reality-show cast of The Real Housewives of Orange County, and, yes, everyday women—suburbanites and city-slickers alike.

While there’s no denying that cougars are slinking into the mainstream, there’s still an element of taboo surrounding these age-spanning relationships.

“It’s definitely considered creepier for women to go out with younger men,” admitted Junie Smith*, a 52-year-old cougar who lives on Manhattan’s Lower East Side. “For a 70-year-old guy to go out with a 40-year-old woman, as opposed to a 70-year-old woman going out with a 40-year-old guy? A 70-year-old woman going out with a 40-year-old guy is considered creepy.”

Why the double standard? Smith figured it comes down to science: “It probably has something to do with the concentration of the species on procreation,” she quipped.

All scientific notions aside, older women opt for younger men for the same reasons that older men select younger women.

“The mentality of having a youthful person on your arm who makes you feel good, who makes you feel ageless, makes you feel desired and desirable,” Gibson said.

Statistics compiled by AARP The Magazine back up the trend.

A whopping 34 percent of women over 40 are dating younger men, according to a 2003 survey. The same poll, which surveyed 3,500 single people (both women and men) aged 40 to 69 year old found that 56 percent are currently separated or divorced from a spouse, 31 percent have never been married, and seven in 10 (74 percent) of formerly married singles in their 50s have been single for five years or more.

The study stated that the divorce rate now, compared to when cougars were married some 25 years ago, has contributed to the amount of single, 50+ women, said to be “on the prowl” in today’s dating pool.
 
* * *

For Wheeler, younger men have been a natural fit for an energetic lifestyle that her male peers have never quite matched.

“I can’t explain why, but I’ve always been,” she said, pausing. “Without even knowing someone’s age, you can be sure I’m going to gravitate toward the younger guy. And I don’t know if it’s a function of I’m attracted to younger guys or younger guys are attracted to me. It’s just their energy, their enthusiasm” and—the biggie—“less baggage.”

In fact, the stuff of the past may be what keeps her from dating men closer to her age altogether. That and music, of course.

“They’re always going on and on about their exes and the kids,” she said of her male peers. “The baggage, the baggage, is the main thing. And being stuck in the music they listened to in college. I want to know what’s new. I want to hear what’s new. Younger guys seem to have more to contribute to my life, and they’re just adorable.”

The AARP study concludes that the No. 1 complaint from both single men and single women—42 percent and 35 percent, respectively—dating in their 50s was the history a partner of the same age carried into a relationship.

Men, of course, have their reasons for dating older women, too. In the fast-paced world of Los Angeles, “dating” may mean going out a few times or spending just one night together. “This isn’t about dating,” said Kevin Mercer* candidly. The 27-year-old works in L.A.’s entertainment industry and isn’t shy discussing his city’s cougar phenomenon. “It’s a total transactional situation.”

And that works out just fine for these young men, who often prefer relationships—whether fleeting or long-term—with cougars.

“These older women are confident, sexually mature, they don’t have inhibitions, they know what they like, and they know what they want,” said Nancy D. O’Reilly, clinical psychologist, researcher, author and host of Voice America’s radio program “Timeless WomenSpeak.” Cougars are independent, career-oriented women who have a been-there-done-that attitude towards marriage and “don’t need anyone to take care of them,” she said. “They’re looking for companionship, sexual contact, and someone good to talk to and spend time with. So be it if the relationship goes further.”

* * *

While women aren’t exactly shouting their cougar status from the rooftops  (“Women never want to be called a “cougar,” because it implies they’re older,” Mercer explained nonchalantly), men aren’t shy about their relationships with older women. On the contrary, they’ll even boast about them, wearing them, in the words of Mercer, “as a badge of honor.”

According to Gibson, young men are driving the trend, sometimes even calling themselves “cougar hunters” when they’re out on the town looking for sexy older women. “Younger men have no problem whatsoever in approaching an older woman who’s single or obviously not wearing a wedding ring anyway,” she said. “They don’t mind at all what age she is as long as she’s vital and gorgeous or something attracts them. Young men have no fear now of being put down by their peers when there’s cougars like Demi Moore and all these beautiful women around, and they say, ‘My gosh, I would love to bed her!”

Smith has found young men to be quite enthusiastic about spending time with her, and she definitely enjoys the attention. After all, she has worked hard for it, with ample sessions of yoga, calculated vitamin concoctions, a good diet, and even a little Botox here and there.

And while she’s not thrilled with the term “cougar” (“slightly dangerous and prone to wearing animal-print clothes,” was her initial cougar visual), she’s certainly not changing her dating habits anytime soon. Wheeler isn’t either, but she’s warming up to the term—slowly.

“It’s silly,” she said laughing. “But I use it. I use it now.”
More Articles on Love & Relationships »
Jo-Jo says:
Lord! - the united states and its "trends"... I am Joey and this is my story. I'm 28 years old and 2 years ago I got married to a wonderful woman who is 25 years older than me. Never had a specific attraction to older women. However, I dated older women since I was 20. I found out about this "cougar" thing a year after my marriage and it made me wonder... Anyhow, I did read some of the recent comments on here and one thing I have to say is; IT is only a TREND... and if you consider yourself intelligent enough, then you will know what i am talking about - In my opinion, if a woman enjoys having sex with younger guys, fine!.. BUT PLEASE dont expect more than that.. UNLESS it goes BEYOND than only a physical attraction and having a good time... cause MARRIAGE is not only that...
I married this wonderful woman because I love her, despite of the huge difference in age, we did it.. and it Did NOT have to do anything with being a cougar or a cougar hunter/fucker... Although, we have to be realistic and accept that at some point in the relationship one of the members of it will pay the price of being into a "non-traditional" relationship... Infidelity, is something that is constantly lurking around and that you, My dear so-called "cougar", might want to think about before making an important decision in your life... I think We men, the young ones and the not so young 99% of the times are going to be attracted to a Nice Looking Woman (21-up) and that is all about - A sexual attraction.. In this case, I believe that it is a reciprocal deal.. You give me something I want, I give you something you WANT...
Anyhow...
In conclusion.. I have been living in the united states for about 2 years and being a present witness of this social phenomenon ;]... and it is too sad to be aware of it... Ladies!! - It is about integrity, dignity and self-respect as women.. things that sadly the female gender are loosing everyday..
I am Joey and I spoke my mind up. (briefly)
peace
Posted: June 2, 2008 4:38PM EDT
rayck says:
YES I HAD THE PLEASURE OF DATING A COUGAR. SHE WAS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME..LET ME BE ME. THE ATTRACTION WAS UNEXPLAINABLE,OH WHAT CHEMISTRY.. SHE PUT 30 YEAR OLDS TO SHAME..SHE MADE ME FEEL LIKE A MAN.. SHE COULD SWAY ME IN THE DIRECTION SHE WANTED TO GO, EASILY ,WITHOUT MAKING ME FEEL LIKE A YOUNGER MAN..SHE HAD FAULTS,LIKE EVERYONE DOES,THAT I COULD OVERLOOK..SHE GAVE EMOTIONAL SUPPORT,AS WELL AS I..SHE LOVES THE SUN AND MOVED OUT TO SUNNY CALIFORNIA, DAMN THAT CALIFORNIA!!!!
Posted: May 11, 2008 6:38AM EDT
I am new to this Cougar thing. I am in love and plan to marry a younger man. He has persued me since the beginning. I am looking for advice on how to deal with the people who will affect his life once we are married. We both love one another and have for years. I am naturally and professionally a care giver. Is there any place for people for me to go to ask questions? I can be contacted at snowlepord2000@yahoo.com

Thank-You for any positive information.
Posted: May 4, 2008 10:42PM EDT
JANINA says:
I AM A COUGAR. MY HUSBAND IS 20 YEARS YOUNGER THEN I. WE HAVE A GREAT LIFE AND HE IS THE BEST MAN I HAVE EVER KNOWN. I HAVE NEVER HAD SUCH LOVE AND DEVOTION. I AM A YOUNG 62 AND I CAN OUT DO HIM SOMETIMES. IT IS A GOOD LIFE WITH THIS WONDERFUL MAN. I KNOW GOD BROUGHT US TOGETHER. WE WERE BOTH LOOKING FOR THE ONE. WE FOUND IT. EACH OTHER. OUR AGE REALLY ISN'T A FACTOR IN OUR RELATIONSHIP. I JUST KNOW, BY NATURE, I WILL NOT GROW OLD WITH HIM AND THIS IS THE ONE THING I DO REGRET ABOUT OUR AGE. OTHER THAN THAT IT IS ALL WONDERFUL. HE DENIES ME NOTHING. HE WAS A GOD SEND AND I TO HIM AS HE PRAISES.
Posted: April 24, 2008 8:59PM EDT
Tia says:
In this day when a 40 something is the new 20 and people are more healty conscious and older women look and feel great. In my opinion it is time that the older woman and yonger man are accepted. I became a cougar by accident. I am at the final stages of my divorce and for some reason the younger men have approached me. At first I was hesitant but why not. They don't require a lot, they are fun, and the best thing is they do not try to take away your independance. I turned 40 this year and have dated 22-35 year olds. The 35 is a little on the older side. I find that the younger man isn't trying to rope you into a real committed relationship. Don't get me wrong. I exclusively date one at a time, and love a person for their great qualities. I go into this knowing that it is only temporary. I have done the love/marriage, kids, thing, there is something to be said for a relationship where both people are honest, in touch with their needs, and just overall enjoy life as it comes with no expectations. Someone very wise once told me the "special" person in your life should enhance your life the way it is, when it becomes too much work it is time to move on........ Get a grip everyone older women are sexy, decisive and wonderful....

Having fun in Bend Oregon!
Posted: April 18, 2008 2:06PM EDT
Wench77 says:
My first husband was 5 yrs older; we had 2 children and I divorced him in 1977. 'Dated' lots of younger men for 7 years then married a guy 17 yrs younger, (me 40 - him 23). I divorced my first after 17 years and my second after 17 months. It wasn't their age, it was their inclination toward alcohol that caused me to divorce them. My entire family were alcoholics and I am a codependent. I never remarried (the only two men who ever hurt me were my husbands)and I am now retired on my first husband's social security, since I was (his)housewife for 14 years and therefore didn't earn as much. I am still friends with more people my daughters ages (38 & 44) than my age. I've always found people my age more set in their ways and not as much fun. Wench77
Posted: March 29, 2008 1:18PM EDT
Bogey N Bacall were 26 years apart, yet they married N had two children together.....sounds great to me.
Posted: March 29, 2008 12:35AM EDT
Forget about age between two people.... If you love each other or are simply attracted to each other then go for it. Who cares what people think !!! Its not their buisness to be concern. Live Life to the fullest! Enjoy !
Posted: March 27, 2008 10:29PM EDT
Donna920 says:
My first husband was 1 year older than I was, my second was 12 years older. It took 3 tries before I got it right. My husband is 12 years younger and I've finally found my soul mate.
I wasn't interested in dating, much less marrying a younger man. To him age wasn't a problem, he loved me for who I am, not how old I am. We've been together for 10 years & married for 8, & we couldn't be happier!
Posted: March 19, 2008 2:43PM EDT
anolen2 says:
I was dating an older woman (50) when I was 22, but she dumped me when I turned 26. She said I was getting too old!
Posted: March 19, 2008 10:23AM EDT
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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 5:44am
Jul 5, 2008

Now you're in the public comment zone. What follows is not CBS News stuff; it comes from other people and we don't vouch for it. A reminder: By using this Web site you agree to accept our Terms of Service. Click here to read the Rules of Engagement.

Since I turned 40, I have had more "children" hitting on me than anyone else from ages 16 to somewhere in their 30s. Though in a way it is complimentary, as a married woman with kids older than them I have always found it a bit disconcerting. I do look really young for my age (I'm nearing 50 now and many think I am in my 20s) but I was always attracted to older men.

My hubby looks like he is in his late 60s even though he is only 8 yrs. older. This never bothered me until recently. Now, he acts like he is old--constantly complaining of aches, wanting only bland food and not really wanting to do much --even his conversation is old fashioned .."In my day..." While I am not ready for and do not relish 20 somethings or even most 30 somethings--I can see why some women go that route--just like women, men need to realize they are as old as they feel and act and reflect. With many men acting like aging babies or petulant kids and with a libido that may need drugs to be effective, look for many more 'cougars' to go after 'cubs'.


Posted by toldyouso21 at 02:27 PM : Apr 06, 2007
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How did these older "ladies" become known as "cougars?"

How 'bout "bats?" That would be more accurate in many instances for alot of older women.



Posted by heresmy2cent at 06:02 PM : Apr 05, 2007
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My wife is nearly 13 years older then me, but I don't think it was a trend back when we got married 13 years ago. I remember on our 2nd date she very nervously told me she'd just turned 50 (I had just turned 37 a few month before) and she was worried about what I'd think. So I proposed to her. We got married 3 weeks later and are still happily married. We've had our usual rough patches, but she's still my best friend who I want to grow old (older?) with. A few people raised their eyebrow but I think it was more for how quickly we married rather then the age difference. Though some of her fellow nurses did give her a high five. Hmmmm....


Posted by RandalDS at 04:01 PM : Apr 05, 2007
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I don't think that there is anything wrong with these "May-December" relationships. What's most important is how the couple that are involved feel. I am comfortable at both ends of the spectrum - whether I was the older or the younger partner - and I think that age is ONLY a state of mind anyway! I always tease the men that I am involved with and tell them that I hope that they can keep up with me anyway LOL. Besides, I find it very flattering when a younger man is interested in me. It makes me feel wanted and youthful, not that that I am old at 45! - smiles. Have a great Easter weekend, E/everyone!


Posted by sweetjill1 at 03:24 PM : Apr 05, 2007
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Can't these loser guys find a girl their age? Or even better a younger one. Sick people in this world! Like dating your mother. Gross.


Posted by zoltaric at 02:47 PM : Apr 05, 2007
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I am 46, my boyfriend(whom I don not own)is 40! He's been watching me for 1 year before asking me out! We have been together since November 2006. I have not dated a man in 8 yrs, because I was waiting for my kids to grow up and move out. This man is one of the best things that has happened to me in my life. I will always apreciate what we have and have had. The only thing that I find "funny", is I wear him out! Hee Hee


Posted by rgold02 at 01:59 PM : Apr 05, 2007
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If you're older, single and are ready for a lot of energy, I say go for it! I met a younger man several months ago, completely unexpected, and I'm having a great time. There are ups and downs just like any relationship. The best parts about this relationship is it's honest and playful.

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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 5:33am
Jul 5, 2008
Older "Cougars" Prey On Young Men Sexy, Older Women Are Dating Younger Men — And The Men Are Loving It
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These women say they would have no problem dating younger men. (CBS/The Early Show)



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(CB Sparks flew when Ann Bancroft seduced Dustin Hoffman in film "The Graduate."

Almost 40 years later, women everywhere — on screen and off — are flaunting their hippest accessory: a sexy, younger man.

"Women are so different now — there's no question," relationship writer Amy Kean told The Early Show co-anchor Russ Mitchell. "Since the beginning of time, women have been basically valued for their youth and their beauty, and men have been valued for their ability to provide for a family. But now so many women have great, thriving careers they just really don't need men the way they used to."

For example, 44-year-old Demi Moore is married to 29-year-old Ashton Kutcher while 40-year-old Halle Berry is dating 31-year-old Gabriel Aubry. There is a 17-year gap between actress Susan Sarandon and longtime boyfriend Tim Robbins.

"When it becomes celebrity driven, it becomes acceptable to everybody. They say, 'Well, if they do then it's OK," Canadian author Valerie Gibson who wrote the book "Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men." "A cougar is a very sophisticated, a very attractive, a very sensually-aware woman, very much in control of her life. She's got a lot of energy. Today they're very fit they're very healthy. They're very successful, very independent and sophisticated."

The cougar-cub relationship is a perfect fit for all kinds of couples.

"I do sometimes compare us to Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher because they're so successful in their relationship," said 34-year-old Stefanie Schwartz, who is engaged to 24-year-old Matt Cavender.

She says one of the great things about dating a younger man is that she is forced to keep up with women his age and, therefore, stays in good shape.

"When I first brought him over to my girlfriends house, she said, 'Oh, you've lost so much weight!' I feel like I have to keep up with women his age and look better and it just makes me feel younger. He's adventurous," she said.

According to a recent online survey, 67 percent of women say they've dated a younger man and 49 percent of men admit to dating an older woman.

Gibson said now the men are even driving the trend.

"The younger men love it. They love the new trend. They go out on their own — they're called 'cougar hunters.' They have Web sites on their own where to find cougars, what to do with them when you find them," she said. "People often say to me, 'Don't these relationships break up more often then others?' and I say, 'They're just like any other relationship: you either get along and everything works or it doesn't.' "

Kean said the trend shows no signs of stopping because women are not going "back to the kitchen" and will only continue to grow stronger and more confident.

"It just means these women are taking what they want," she said. "It's about time. Men have done it forever."

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Posted: Jul 5, 2008 5:23am
Apr 9, 2008
The CARE2 community has been so warm inviting and helpful. I can hardly keep up with the invites etc... Thought I give a BIG shout out this way to let you all know how wonderful I think you and the CARE2 site are! I have much to learn as I am new to the whole Activist scene but I've always wanted to do something , just didn't know what. Now I have choices and helpful advise from CARE(2)ING people. Finally a Social Site with a Purpose other than HOOKING-UP!!! I'll work hard to earn those Stars I've already received. It's been less than 24 hours, I've nearly got my home page set up!!
                 LYNN F.
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