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8 Hilarious Protests One Million Moms Launched This Year

8 Hilarious Protests One Million Moms Launched This Year
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One Million Moms, the American Family Association project of literally hundreds of moms, is infamous for its unintentionally hilarious morality protests over TV shows, advertisement campaigns and, in particular, entertainment shows supporting LGBT rights. Here are just eight protests that the Moms launched this year that made us chuckle.

1. Glee “Mocks” Christianity by Being Glee

While it may be the season to be jolly, the Moms certainly aren’t thrilled with Glee and its “Never Aired Christmas” episode. The Moms write in a breathless missive:

The show featured the transgender student, Unique, portraying the Virgin Mary in their high school’s nativity scene and acts out giving birth to the baby Jesus. The doll representing Jesus wore a sequin diaper and was thrown from singer to singer while they sang “Love Child, Never Meant to be.” Baby Jesus is tossed around like a rag doll and shown no respect.

In another scene, a bisexual “Sexy Santa,” gets two female characters and the show’s gay male character drunk before robbing them blind – all this after making out with and tying the male character up in bed.

Transphobia, check. Biphobia, check. Also, complete lack of a sense of humor? Definitely, check.

2. Macy’s too “Kinky” for Holiday Parade

Macy’s recently put on a fantastic Thanksgiving Day parade float, featuring performers from the hit Broadway production and LGBT-affirming “Kinky Boots.” Social conservatives began hyperventilating, and the Moms were no different.

I’ll let the Moms tell you what they found so disagreeable:

“Raise You Up” was not suitable for families for many reasons. The inappropriate act starred Kinky Boots, referencing a musical written to celebrate the differences in each other and included: (all) the men and women in thigh-high boots [mostly red pleather while others were sparkly "hooker" boots], a man in boxer shorts and men in burlesque and Moulin rouge costumes prancing around expressing themselves, RuPaul (famous drag queen) along with several men dressed in drag, transgender and transvestites, singing and dancing as an expression of “diversity” and honoring whatever sexuality you want.

So, just to summarize, expressing yourself is forbidden.

This protest is worth including, not just for the hysteria evidenced above, but the way the makers of the show answered this pearl clutching: the performers all went to Macy’s a few days later and shopped while wearing their thigh-high boots.

Here’s the performance everyone was talking about this year:

3. Dracula is Dracula, so Protest!

The Moms were furious at NBC this year for many reasons. In particular, they showed their fangs for NBCs “Dracula” which apparently was just too, well, Dracula-like for them to stomach:

Warning! NBC’s “Dracula” season premiere is set to air this Friday, October 25 at 10:00 p.m. ET/9:00 p.m. CT with a TV-14 rating. The gory series will air on weekends when children and teens potentially stay up later. As another program to warp the minds of our youth, it will likely give children nightmares.

Why children would be watching it at 10:00 pm is anyone’s guess. Anyway, as proof that the Moms would go on a broad banning crusade if they could, here’s what they object to about the show:

“Previews of this program also included: terrifying screams, a rotted corpse, death, murder, a woman burned alive while tied to a stake, spirits, satanic and occult elements, homosexual content, tons of blood (mostly on Dracula’s face and victim’s necks) and other gore, including decapitated heads in boxes and pools of blood.”

My advice: Moms, don’t ever pick up an Anne Rice novel!

4. Ahhh! Two Moms on a Kid’s Show. The Horror.

We already know the Moms don’t like gay people. They’ve been known to protest homosexual superheroes, advertisements featuring gay people, and even national treasure Ellen Degeneres.

When it was announced that the last series of the show “Good Luck Charlie,” a Disney Channel production aimed at older children, would broadcast an episode featuring a child with two moms, the Moms reacted with typical venom:

Just because something may be legal or because some are choosing a lifestyle doesn’t make it morally correct. Disney should stick to entertaining instead of pushing an agenda. Disney decided to be politically correct versus providing family-friendly programming. Disney has a choice whether to produce a program with certain fictional characters; the storyline could be re-written or changed. Conservative families need to urge Disney to exclude confusing topics that children are far too young to comprehend.

Apparently, love is confusing to children.

5. Hide the Joe! Hide the Joe!

It really must have been a slow week at Mom HQ when they decided to protest this one. Kmart, wanting to flog us some new pants, recently came out with a cheeky take on Jingle Bells entitled “Show Us Your Joe.”

Here it is:

And here’s what the Moms had to say:

The title of the current ad is “Show Your Joe,” and Kmart includes sexual content during a Christmas hand bell choir performance. The commercial focuses on several men wearing Joe Boxer underwear thrusting in a sexualized way to the tune of Jingle Bells. They start gyrating and shaking themselves instead of the hand bells, intending to make their “bells” ring in song – which is highly inappropriate.

If that was “thrusting in a sexualized way,” I think the Moms have been going wrong somewhere.

Next Page: Bestiality, the Beast and Nudity!

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Photo credit: Thinkstock.

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2:13AM PDT on May 9, 2014

Good grief. The only one of my FB friends who likes OMM used to drop acid in high school and sleep with her bf on a daily basis. What a hypocrite! They have too much time on their hands, and I think most members are stay at home moms who also choose to homeschool. They want to keep their kids innocent forever and in a plastic bubble.

10:56AM PDT on Apr 8, 2014

"The gory series will air on weekends when children and teens potentially stay up later. As another program to warp the minds of our youth, it will likely give children nightmares."

Better not let them watch the news or take any history classes, in that case.

8:30PM PST on Feb 15, 2014

lolz

3:13PM PST on Dec 28, 2013

"Get a life" and do something truly productive, like protesting animal abuse, child abuse, etc.

4:30AM PST on Dec 28, 2013

I agree with Susan T.!!!!!!

12:51PM PST on Dec 20, 2013

I completely agree with Susan T. Merry Christmas.

11:17AM PST on Dec 20, 2013

Wow.

11:14AM PST on Dec 20, 2013

Kinda stupid--these moms need to get a life.

7:14AM PST on Dec 20, 2013

Ridiculing intolerance with intolerance? Now THAT is intolerance doubled. Come on, we don't have to agree but we should not be dismissive.This article isn't any better than what 1MM does. We don't support tolerance if we can't be tolerant of those we don't agree with.

I don't agree with the basis for their outrage. That is my right as is their right to be outraged. I do agree that 'Naked and Afraid' has got to be extremely low on my 'entertainment' list but just because I think it is stupid, not because they are naked or immoral. It is funny to me that 1MM can't even bring themselves to spell out 'naked'. Oh, well.

Kinky Boots, the movie was a wonderful commentary on learning tolerance for others and showing the humanity under the facade. That they don't understand the point is their loss. Steve Williams also seems to have missed the point.

I LOVE the bell ringing ad. It cracks me up every time. Too bad 1MM didn't get it, but they don't deserve what they got in this article.

5:23AM PST on Dec 20, 2013

So OMM thinks NAKED is a bad word? Were we not born that way? Are not all animals born that way? Was it not because God saw Adam & Eve wearing clothes that he knew they had sinned? Shouldn't OMM be in favor of nudity, for it is as God intended us to be? I mean the word NAKED appears in Genesis 2 once and in Genesis 3 three times in reference to Adam & Eve.

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