“Fatties” Ousted From Dating Website: 5,000 Members Cut After Holiday Weight Gain

Our culture’s obsession with thinness and beauty never ceases to amaze me, but the extent of this obession was proven to me this morning when I read the following headline: “Fat people kicked off dating website.”

What dating website would sink so low?

BeautifulPeople.com of course.

If you ever needed a clearer picture of the thin-beauty rule this would be it.

The dating site, which has a “strict ban on ugly people” and markets itself as an elite community for beautiful people, launched back in 2005. Since then the website has launched around the world in 16 countries with sites in English, Italian, Portuguese, Danish, Spanish, and French.

This year when some unflattering pictures surfaced of members who had packed on some pounds during the holidays, the “beautiful people” revolted! Members complained that these people had “let themselves go” and the company responded by “moving the newly chubby members back to the rating stage.”

See how it works is that you submit a profile and picture to the site that is then rated by existing members of the opposite sex (What about the queer community? No need apply?) over a 48-hour period based on whether or not they find the applicant “beautiful.” If applicants secure enough positive votes(the site doesn’t give a measure for what “enough” entails) they are granted membership to the Beautiful People Network.

In punishment for their holiday weight gain, the offending members had their applications forcibly resubmitted to the rating stage to await the judgment of the Beautiful People community for a second time. The verdict: Over 5,000 previously existing members were ousted!

“As a business, we mourn the loss of any member, but the fact remains that our members demand the high standard of beauty be upheld,” said Robert Hintze, founder of BeautifulPeople.com. “Letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model and the very concept for which BeautifulPeople.com was founded.”

Well, let me just say that the concept from which BeauitfulPeople.com was founded is shallow and self-deprecating, even dangerous. Equating thinness with beauty is a loaded metaphor that does a disservice to us all. Women and young girls are literally dying to be thin and beautiful around the world. In the U.S. today it is estimated that approximately 8 million people suffer from eating disorders, 7 million of which are women (statistics for eating disorders globally could not be found – anyone know of any good research?)

Was the purpose of kicking out these 5,000 people a warning to all BeautifulPeople.com members? Hey, better not let the pounds pack on or else! (I wonder if there is a place for weight on the profile? I bet there is.) What’s next, a weight restriction to even submit an application (I guess that would be hard to enforce online, but you know what I mean)?

The rejected members were sent emails encouraging them to apply again, but only after they were back to “looking their best.”

This whole operation – the site, the creator’s vision, the witch hunt against weight gainers – is all so infuriating, not to mention ridiculous!

What if all the energy we directed at losing weight and being beautiful was directed at a different goal – say our education, careers, or families.

What kind of a world would that look like? One where BeautifulPeople.com certainly didn’t exist.

Celebrate a wider definition of beauty with the following posts from Care2:

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Photo courtesy of BeautifulPeople.com

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Shawn R.

8:21AM PST on Feb 20, 2011

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Chinmayee J.

12:09AM PDT on May 24, 2010

I have to say that staying at your healthy weight is very very important, mainly from a medical perspective. So no I do not think big is beautiful, because I have seen too many people suffering from illnesses that have been a direct result of their being overweight. However, I think this concept of 'Beautiful People' is ridiculous and extremely superficial, and not a good message to send out to the public. Being underweight or anorexic also creates health issues, not to mention it is not the key to being beautiful. When will people realise that it really is what is on the inside that counts? I think that people should stick to a healthy weight and stop worrying about what the media tells them is beautiful!! Furthermore, I think the people who got rejected from that ludicrous site probably learnt a valuable lesson, as they shouldn't have joined such a superficial site in the first place!! Says something about those people and their outlook on life...

Alexandra R.

3:04AM PST on Feb 11, 2010

I SOOO agree with Sue Anne. Though I used to think I prefer my man with a little weight, as there is INDEED a lot of supposedly beautiful but oh so boring people, I have been pleasantly surprised to recently meet someone who is like myself on the slim side, but VERY interesting, funny and attractive on the inside . . .

Someone I get on with on so many levels. I could NEVER imagine choose someone purely or primarily on their looks, as that alone does not appeal to me as beautiful.

There is NO man as beautiful or attractive as him and that is not only because of his good looks on the outside.

Sueanne J.

7:33AM PST on Feb 10, 2010

Beauty is purely a subjective matter, so what is attractive to one person may not be to another. Some people prefer their partners to have a little more weight. In any case, I think such a site is extremely shallow and I would never pick a partner based entirely on looks. There are a lot of beautiful, boring people in the world. My boyfriend is attractive, but I love him because he makes me laugh more than anyone else.

Carolyn H.

2:02PM PST on Jan 30, 2010

This dating site sounds like a hell realm full of people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder!

Kats Greenseas C.

7:08PM PST on Jan 21, 2010

ditto to Mary C.

Debra R.

7:08AM PST on Jan 21, 2010

Size doesn't matter in a dating situation. It's sending out the wrong message. That people who weigh more shouldn't be dating? What is the reason for being so ignorant, they should have left this service anyways. This service should be shunned by all people for their attack's on something as petty as weight gain.

Maria F.

5:02PM PST on Jan 19, 2010

This people must suffer of some kind of "dementia" or worse.What will happen when they grow old?? will they still be beautifull??? and..what canons do they apply to "certificate" that a person is ..beautifull??? Oh my....this is apocaliptical

Kate S.

1:44PM PST on Jan 18, 2010

Nancy, there is a limit to everything. if you are 500 pounds overweight, that means that you are 500 pounds above the "overweight" status. that's alot. let yourself go that far and unless you have some kind of medical reason you ARE a lazy slob who dosn't care about their health. Dosn't mean you're not a good person, dosn't mean you don't have inner beauty- it just means that 500 pounds overweight is ridiculous.

Anyway, those outsted from the dating website KNEW all about the site before they joined. they knew it would be like this. It's their own fault.

Mary C.

6:10AM PST on Jan 18, 2010

Nancy, if a 500 pound person is spilling over into my seat on the airplane, then yes they should pay for half of it. Each seat has a price and if you need two, you pay for two. If I want 2 seats I pay for two seats.