http://www.care2.com/greenliving/six-tools-for-happiness.html
Six Tools for Happiness
Adapted from What Happy People Know, by Dan Baker, Ph.D. and Cameron Stauth (Rodale Press, 2003).
We all want to be happy, but most of us are trapped by ways of thinking and behaving that seem to keep us perpetually dissatisfied.
But there are six simple tools that will help us to be truly, deeply happy. Find out what they are:
1. Appreciation.
This is the first and most fundamental happiness tool. Appreciation is the purest, strongest form of love. It is the outward-bound kind of love that asks for nothing and gives everything. Research now shows that it is physiologically impossible to be in a state of appreciation and a state of fear at the same time. Thus, appreciation is the antidote to fear.
2. Choice.
Choice is the root of freedom and the voice of the heart. Having no choices, or options, feels like being in jail. It leads to depression, anxiety, and the condition called learned helplessness. Choice can even govern perception. Anyone can choose the course of their lives, but only happy people do it.
3. Personal power
This is the almost indefinable proactive force, similar to character, that gives you power over your feelings and power over your fate. Personal power has two components: taking responsibility and taking action. It means realizing that your life belongs to you and you alone, and then doing something about it. Personal power keeps you from being a victim.
4. Leading with your strengths.
When you give in to the automatic fear reaction, it makes you focus on your weaknesses, which only reinforces your fear. But when you take the path of the intellect and spirit, you naturally begin to focus on your strengths–and start to solve your situation. People often think that fixing their weaknesses will save them, but it rarely works. It’s just too painful. Leading with your strengths feels good, and that’s why it works. Simple but true.
5. The power of language and stories.
We don’t describe the world we see–we see the world we describe. Language, as the single most fundamental force of the human intellect, has the power to alter perception. We think in words, and these words have the power to limit us or to set us free; they can frighten us or evoke our courage. Similarly, the stories we tell ourselves about our own lives eventually become our lives. We can tell healthy stories or horror stories. The choice is ours.
6. Multidimensional living.
There are three primary components of life: relationships, health, and purpose (which is usually work). Many people, though, put all their energy into just one area. The most common choice is work, because work best assuages our survival fears of not having enough and not being enough. Other people become obsessed with relationships (because relationship is another word for love), and some people limit their lives in the name of longevity. None of this works. Happiness comes from a full life.
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25 comments
add your comment »Dan Baker has stated it simply. I agree with these solutions for happiness. I have found that being happy is a choice and a process. I have also found that when I focus on what I want to see happen, I am proactive and gain the best of what I desire. The language I use gives me just what I express. I am so grateful to know that being appreciative opens the world of positive opportunities. For me, this perception makes me a winner. Thanks for the reminder Brian. You are a great example of success. I plan, God willing to continue to use these tools to maintain a peaceful, happy co-existence with life. Parenting with strengths, aided my husband and I to develop three capable children. We use these tools as the chief organizing principles of our life. I am eager to read Dr. Baker's book. Sincerely, Khadijah U. Bilal
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I found that living as simple as possible-- clearing out unnecessary debts (some can't be avoided--but many can), eating whole foods, allowing yourself to act goofy - laugh at yourself, getting sunshine and fresh air and colors (especially during Winter), enough sleep, finding an excuse to laugh--(watching comedies, etc) and knowing that you are a valuable human being because if you weren't, you would not be born or exist, and tapping into a Higher Power than ourselves all help to make for a happy person.
This is what I strive for because by nature, I 'm normally a "cup half empty " type of person unless I say "no" to my negativity.
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Thank for sharing this touching of lists, and I beleive that # 6 is the most important things for our life.
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Thanks for this artical... I can relate to learned helplessness leading to depression. I have came a long way in my healing & I am now here to help others heal themselves. Focusing on my strengths & not my weaknesses from now on. Peace, love & light to you all.
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Thank you so much for sharing this treasure with us. I plan to read this daily as part of "thinking upward" as I negotiate life issues that already seem less difficult as a result of having read your message.
I shall share it with friends as well. So many of us are caught up in the net of petty intrigues of life, love, and work when we should concentrate on how we view and describe all three phenomena.
Your daily messages have helped me greatly. Thank you so much.
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wow-I found myself wanting to share this with everyone I come into contact with - these are truths that apply to us all. As a primary care provider, I work daily with patients who are depressed, anxious or living very unhealthy lifestyles with all the problems that are associated. These truths are concise and provide tangible ways to think of yourself, your life, and ways to grow. I plan on sharing these with all my patients, but especially those suffering from depression, anxiety, chronic pain, obesity. And most of all - myself - keep myself from becoming overwhelmed from the problems of the world.
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that is so true and it makes a lot of sense. that really made my day thanks for sharing.
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Your list is right on. I agree with in total. This could be a great building block for life changing events...like the advent of world peace. Thanks for sharing this list. Great food for thought.
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For the last number of years, every evening before going to bed, I express thanks for all the nice things that have happened for me that day. No matter how busy or trying a day is there are always some nice parts to it. I find I've never had less than 5 things each day to be thankful for. I really believe that expressing gratitude and appreciation changes your mindset and brings more of the same into your life.
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Thoughts become things...Choose the good ones!
:)
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