4 Questions To Help You Heal

My new friend Dr. Bernie Siegel, author of Love, Medicine & Miracles, and one of our newest bloggers on Owning Pink, asks his patients four key questions I wanted to share with you.

4 Healing Questions

1. Do you want to live to be 100?

According to Bernie, the answer to this question depends on many factors, most notably, whether you feel in control of your life and whether you look forward to the future with hope or with fear. Inherent in the answer to this question is a potent message about your will to live. Of course, none of us want to live an extended life of deteriorated health, but what if we could live to be 100 – and feel vital until the end? Ah, there’s the question.

2. What happened to you in the year or two before your illness?

Crisis – in the form of loss of a loved one, divorce, job loss, financial crisis, rape, dreams dashed, and other such stressors – suppresses the immune system and predisposes us to illness. Understanding what may have predisposed us to illness can help us heal.

3. What does this illness mean to you?

If your illness automatically means death or disability to you, you’ve got a problem. But if you view it merely as a wake-up call, there’s hope for true, lasting, deep healing.

4. Why do you need this illness?

This question helps get at the root of what psychological needs the disease may meet. From the time we’re children, we learn that being sick has benefits. You get to stay home from school, watch movies, eat chicken soup, skip your chores, miss that big test. As we get older, being sick still has advantages. You get an excuse to slow down, work less, shirk family duties, gain sympathy, even earn money in the form of disability payments. Being sick can even serve as a way to avoid following your dreams – a way to avoid feeling like a failure, even.

If you can identify what needs your illness meets, you can brainstorm other, healthier ways to meet your needs so you can release the illness and reclaim your health.

Doesn’t Bernie ROCK? I love these four questions, because each taps into something vital about self-healing and offers you the opportunity, not only to better understand your disease process, but also to better know yourself.

Have you been battling a physical or mental health condition? Do these questions bring up anything for you? I invite you to share your insights here, as we bear witness to them.

What if I told you caring for your body was the LEAST important part of your health? Watch my TEDx talk here to learn the MOST important part.

Holding space for whatever may come up,

****

Lissa Rankin, MD: Founder of OwningPink.com, Pink Medicine Revolutionary, motivational speaker, and author of What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend and Encaustic Art: The Complete Guide To Creating Fine Art With Wax.

Learn more about Lissa Rankin here.

Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

Lost A.

3:03PM PST on Feb 15, 2012

I'm ill and I can tell you that I don't want to live to be 100!

send a green star

heather g.

11:05PM PST on Feb 9, 2012

Thank you, Lissa. What a great lecture.....

Laurie D.

1:25PM PST on Feb 9, 2012

Mmmm. Do you think this article is aimed at the YOUNG who are facing SHORT TERM illnesses? I REALLY don't think it would apply to an older person with a chronic condition too well... Most older people who are aging ARE fighting the good fight. They don't want or need to use illness for anything -- especially if they are already retired! I sincerely wish Care2 would realize their audience is a broad range of ages. It would make us older members feel less marginalized if that fact was honored -- perhaps in the titles of the articles!

Krista R.

1:16PM PST on Feb 9, 2012

Well that last one was rather dumb and obviously made up by someone who has never been ill. I love that part that maybe you're sick so you won't feel like a failure. You know how many sick people feel like a failure BECAUSE they are sick and cannot work or do things on their own, not the other way around.

Oh, and I also love that it says we get sick cause are brain thinks of the great advantage of getting disability payments. Do you know how hard it is to get Disability, or how long it takes to get especially if you have a hard to diagnose illness. I know people who had to appeal for years while in the process lost their house cause they couldn't work and had no money due to it.

Norma V.

4:08AM PST on Feb 9, 2012

I enjoy Bernie Siegel's comments. In this day and age, toxicity rulse. Loving and nurturning one's body is a start to good health.

Federico S.

7:41PM PST on Feb 8, 2012

"Mind is the builder, body is the result."
~Edgar Cayce

Melinda offline K.

2:49PM PST on Feb 8, 2012

This is very New Agey Flakey - only in some cases people are manipulating life by having an illness, there are so many complex reasons why your body isn't functioning correctly - my message is no matter what you are going through be kind to yourself, choose to view yourself in a space of love, compassion and high self esteem. This kind of article is reflective of the massive egos running around the new age world right now, extracting money from people vulnerable with illness and creating more pain for people through their own belief system. As a healer I can tell you for sure, there are so many complex reasons why your body is going through what it is and each case is very individual. So many people get sucked into this stuff and run around touting it as the complete truth.

Rosie L.

2:42PM PST on Feb 8, 2012

thanks for sharing!

Penny C.

2:04PM PST on Feb 8, 2012

I want to live as long as Im supposed too,so long as the really bad pain stays away.

Richard R.

11:57AM PST on Feb 8, 2012

Are you saying that a person with a disability can't "view it as a wake-up call" and so should give up hoping for "true, lasting, deep healing"? That is insulting to so many people. And you think that people with a disability have an "excuse" to avoid obligations? Let me tell you something! They aren't *excuses*! They are *valid reasons". There's a difference! One can be defensive with an "excuse", but a "valid reason" is determined by the disability! Granted some people may use a disability as an excuse, but the majority, they have chronic pain and handicaps that often restrict their lives and when they say they *can't* do something, you should believe it!