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Animal Romance: They Have Sex How?!

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Animal Romance: They Have Sex How?!

Perhaps from the perspective of a ladybug or a white-fronted parrot, humans have some odd ways of wooing the opposite sex (think Valentine cards, romantic music and candlelight), but the animal world definitely has some bizarre sexual rituals of their own.

From penises that break off during mating, slimy love darts, to watching porn, continue reading to discover how other animals like to get it on!




Pandas like watching porn. When the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding and Research Center in China implemented private porn viewings, their panda population doubled nearly overnight. How the researchers figured this out, remains an interesting question.


The male bedbug has a lance-like penis and to inseminate the female he must literally stab her in her abdomen like an overly enthusiastic Zorro! The semen he injects floods the female’s bloodstream and eventually fertilizers her eggs.  Curiously, these bed-bound creatures do not seem to be particularly discriminating, as males have been found with the same stab marks on their bodies. This type of sex is known as traumatic insemination  - and it could be happening in your bed right now!

Clown Fish

The Pixar film, Finding Nemo, starts out with the happy scene of a mommy and daddy clownfish peering proudly at their 400-egg brood. The mommy soon gets eaten by a scary-looking barracuda, but that is beside the point.  In reality, the percula clownfish do not have mommies and daddies, as clownfish switch their gender when the timing is right.  Yes, the clownfish changes genders like your Aunt Gladys changes hats.  The largest clownfish in its community acts like a female and the others act like males. When the “female”  dies or is simply devoured by a hungry barracuda, the next biggest male will change sex and assume the female roll of laying eggs.


Red-sided Gardner Snake

The red-sided gardner snake loves a good orgy. These snakes conserve heat by wintering together in a big sleepy snake ball — up to 30,000 snakes big! When the weather warms and  mating season begins, the males become a highly energized squirming, scaly ball of pulsating passion that can be over two feet high. One highly sought-after female is usually in the center of said snake ball and if the passionate determination of all her suitors doesn’t kill her, she will lay a lovely brood of eggs fathered by more than one male.

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Read more: Behavior & Communication, Less Common Pets, Love, Nature, Pets, Sex, Wildlife, , , , , , , , , , , ,

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Cherise Udell

Cherise Udell is a mom, clean air advocate, anthropologist and feline aficionado with the nomadic habit of taking spontaneous sojourns to unusual destinations. Before her adventures in motherhood, she was an intrepid Amazon jungle guide equipped with a pair of sturdy wellingtons and a 24-inch machete, as well as a volunteer at a rainforest animal rescue center.


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5:15AM PDT on Jun 28, 2013

thank you for sharing 28/6

8:35AM PDT on May 10, 2013

the monkey one. i liked it best. lol

9:55AM PDT on Mar 21, 2013

and Happy Spring!

9:54AM PDT on Mar 21, 2013

I don't think I could handle seeing 30,000 snakes in a ball...I would probably jump off a cliff :)

9:53AM PDT on Mar 21, 2013

well...that made my day!

8:24PM PST on Mar 4, 2013

I needed a good laugh. Thanks.

8:54PM PST on Feb 27, 2013


8:35PM PST on Feb 27, 2013


6:40PM PST on Feb 20, 2013


12:09PM PST on Feb 17, 2013

talk about some eye opening boom chicka wow wow

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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