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Overcoming UnderDREAMing: Part 2

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Overcoming UnderDREAMing: Part 2

How to Desire More & Still Appreciate What You Have…

One of my Get Out Of Your Own Way students posted this in our private forum. With her permission, I wanted to share it because I think this is such a common way we prevent ourselves from dreaming big. In Part 1 of the Overcoming UnderDREAMing series, we tackled how to practice dreaming big so you exercise this skill like a muscle. In Part 2, we’ll address how to be grateful and still live the mojo-full life we all deserve.

I feel like I was just getting to a place where I was feeling content and loving what is in my life, and now I feel torn. Like, darn, I knew my life wasn’t perfect.  That’s why I’m here [taking the Get Out Of Your Own Way e-course].  But now I feel really focused on what’s NOT the way I want it to be and like that has really spiraled me downward into a place where it all feels so overwhelming – where do I start? There are so many actions I could take, so many areas I could work on… and it all feels terrifying. I feel scared to take action in this vulnerable state. I feel scared when I look at who I really am – like I don’t really have any clue. I am a conglomeration of masks, and I just don’t see what’s underneath. I can’t recognize hardly anything as authentically ME. I’m afraid to take this girl out into the world because I’m still not clear who she is, and I feel like that seems reckless. How can I love her if I don’t know her? How do you love and appreciate what you have while simultaneously striving for improvement?

Such great questions to discuss!  This thread inspired an uber juicy dialogue in our private Get Out Of Your Own Way forum, where the students and I interact together every day. It turns out that many of the students struggle with overcoming underdreaming, and at the root of it lies this question:

How do you dream big and still appreciate what is in the moment?
Here’s how I answered them:

Once you have crossed the Pink Threshold and started dreaming big, you might find yourself feeling blue, which might tempt you to stop dreaming. So what do you do?

You start with self-love and gratitude. Instead of kicking yourself for what you’re not doing well enough, love yourself for how much you ROCK. You become your biggest cheerleader. You remind yourself how awesome you are – already, right now, in this very minute.

And instead of focusing exclusively on what’s missing from your life, you stand simultaneously in the bounty of how much you already have. You ride the gratitude train. You list what you’re grateful for every day. You notice everything that’s going right in your life. You celebrate what is – right here, right now.

Then you can be free to dream big and desire more. Most people are either glass half full or glass half empty people. They’re either cheerful Pollyannas, not sweating the small stuff and focusing on the positive or they’re grumpy Scrooges who bah-humbug their way through life without ever feeling satisfied. I’m asking you not to choose- to just look at the glass without judging it.

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Lissa Rankin

Lissa Rankin, MD is a mind-body medicine physician, founder of the Whole Health Medicine Institute training program for physicians and other health care providers, and the New York Times bestselling author of Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself.  She is on a grassroots mission to heal health care, while empowering you to heal yourself.  Lissa blogs at and also created two online communities - and She is also the author of two other books, a professional artist, an amateur ski bum, and an avid hiker. Lissa lives in the San Francisco Bay area with her husband and daughter.


+ add your own
6:13AM PDT on Jul 13, 2011

Thanks for sharing.

8:53PM PDT on Jun 29, 2011

Thank you for the inspiration!

9:40PM PDT on Jun 19, 2011

I have always struggled with something similar to this last point "How do you love and appreciate what you have while simultaneously striving for improvement?"
but I phase it as, if you accept everything as perfect as it is, why would you want to change it? i.e., where is the motivation to change. My brother has no problem with this, but to me it is as unfathomable as a Koan.

4:52PM PDT on Jun 19, 2011

It certainly is the power of positive thinking and having the gratitude for what you have this very moment. With that sort of attitude you can not help but go forward and do whatever it is that you dream of.

3:30PM PDT on Jun 17, 2011

Interesting concept. Some of what I think you have overlooked is being in the moment. Acceptance of your situation and being aware of your abilities. I have done and continue to evolve as a person, wife,friend, business person, mother, sister, ect. Dreams are aspects of us that are not always best acted upon. Think through and then act on dreams with a clarity and a plan.

11:16AM PDT on Jun 17, 2011

Why work?

Day dream your way to success.

Then put legs to your dreams.

That's why work.

11:14AM PDT on Jun 17, 2011

Dreams are real other dimensions.

2:52AM PDT on Jun 17, 2011

Person can achieve any thing if he has positive thinking and determination to do it nothing is imposable

10:27PM PDT on Jun 16, 2011

thanks for sharing.

7:47PM PDT on Jun 16, 2011

my father tried so hard to impress upon me how short life really is - but being 15 i really didn't grasp it. i mean, he was so OLD [in his early fourties!], so how could life be short? funny that i still should remember it, although a lot of good that did.

life is not only short, you have to decide what you want to do with it, instead of waiting for something to happen that will clarify it for you.

pick a direction! it maybe wrong, but at least you then know that is not what you want and try something else until you finally arrive at the proper destination.

this may not seem possible, but if you think of what may be, instead of what you just possibly couldn't do, you'll get there.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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