START A PETITION 27,000,000 members: the world's largest community for good

How to Stop Complaining

Most of the time when we complain a lot, weíre avoiding what we really need to feel. When we find ourselves griping about something outside of us, itís a good sign that we havenít addressed something inside. Watch this vlog to learn more.

3 Ways to Defend Your Brain Against Complainers

Read more: Health, Inspiration, Life, Spirit, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

have you shared this story yet?

go ahead, give it a little love

Gabby Bernstein

Featured in the New York Times Sunday Styles section as "a new role model," motivational speaker, life coach and author Gabrielle Bernstein is making her mark. Expanding the lexicon for the next generation spiritual seekers, Gabrielle is a #1 bestselling author of the book Add More ~ing to Your Life Ė A hip guide to happiness, and Spirit Junkie, A Radical Road to Self-Love and Miracles. In 2008 she launched her social networking site for young women to find mentors. HerFuture's growing community exceeds 12,000 members.


+ add your own
7:52PM PDT on Aug 25, 2013

Thank you :)

1:09PM PDT on Aug 25, 2013


10:30AM PDT on Aug 19, 2013

Thank you Gabby, for Sharing this!

8:36PM PDT on Aug 11, 2013

een fighting/ complaining / finding faults galore w/ my good friend for 2-3 days.... just stressing over the untimely loss of a cousin sister at 44ys & healthy. Finally calming, as funeral & cremation is tomorrow, and the anger / fury/ despondency is lifting. As i let her go w/ grace, I too become calm and recapture my own grace ( be it a golden silence & lots of hugs & tears -- for now)

In this case it needed time to heal. Routine frustrations can lift more easily.

6:05AM PDT on Aug 11, 2013

Thank you Gabby, for Sharing this!

9:01PM PDT on Aug 5, 2013

One other thing I recall is a saying it goes like this, If you are not the solution to the problem you are the problem. But I guess it means to not just yell about crap that is just crap. Fix what you can fix or be quiet about it. No one wants to hear a lot of stupid baby whining. Well ok write a petiotion or sign one related to your grype or if the tire's flat change it. But common sense tells us that just gryping won't fix the flat tire. If you are unable to fix this thing kindly ask someone to help you. A lot of people live to help others.Better yet choose to be one of these people and you will be just too hapy and buisy helping to think of your former complaint! This is one I do a lot of.

8:56PM PDT on Aug 5, 2013

I have a daughter who I have already told that all she ever wants to do is grype about the same things, that no one but her can change. Until once I confronted her and told her the reason she is so unhappy is she is doing something wrong. That that something was denying her children whatever they needed each time she gave in and did it. And for awhile she stopped the habbit and complaining. She was herself! And then a little while longer she was right back to those old ways.And so I just avoid her.Which she hates. I am not spending my time being brought down down down!!! Yes I am her Mom but I can only raise her so far and the rest is up to her! Ah the joy of loving grankids! And I have a husband whos father just passed away. I know he is a constant complainer. Right now I expect him to bemoan it is part of the healing process. I still love all of my people. But can only deal with so much dark energy. Period. What about when I am down? I tend to look around. and then feel a lot better.

7:22AM PDT on Aug 5, 2013

There are a lot of things that need complaining about.

6:49AM PDT on Aug 1, 2013

To all those who are saying that sometimes we have to complain to get things done: That's not (or shouldn't be) the kind of complaining Gabby is talking about. That is REPORTING a problem and asking or even demanding that it be corrected. That can obviously be useful and necessary. But whining about or even just mentioning every little perceived problem around us doesn't accomplish anything: it just keeps us feeling down and also drags down everyone around us. Before saying something negative, what would it hurt (and it really only helps) to ask oneself, "Why do I feel the need to vocalize this, and might it not be better NOT to say it?"

5:17AM PDT on Aug 1, 2013

Treasure what we've got

add your comment

Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

people are talking

That's why I grow my own.

I just started putting lemon in water at the recommendation of my Yoga Therapist, looking forward to…

Rescued is my favorite breed.


Select names from your address book   |   Help

We hate spam. We do not sell or share the email addresses you provide.