Is Self Love Selfish?

When the spirited writer and illustrator S A R K made the decision to be consciously single (which, she reminds us, is different from being single and looking for a partner, or just waiting for one, but involves truly embarking on a love-affair with yourself), she was faced with many questions and fears.

Find out some of what she has learned on her delicious solo journey, here:

“I had always been afraid to explore self-love for fear of what I would find, or not find there–or being thought of as selfish! Also, who would I be without someone to love? Could I really stop ‘looking’ and just look at myself? And, if I was not enough for myself, how could I be enough for another? Could I be my own Someone?

“I saw the ‘gifts’ of all my poor choices and misguided relationships, and felt the fear I uncovered when I really looked in the mirror and said I love you. It has taken a lot of time and work to be able to look at myself in the mirror with compassion and see only love and it happens intermittently.

“The pleasure has been in finding myself so precious and lovable. I as amazed to witness how endearing I can be. I am learning still, how to feel deserving of this self-love. I’m also solidifying my trust in life and my self.

Inspired by Eat Mangoes Naked, by S A R K (Simon and Schuster, 2001).

36 comments

Fiona T.
Fi T.3 years ago

Loving oneself doesn't really mean to be selfish only if the love is not exclusive

a             y m.
g d c.3 years ago

ty

a             y m.
g d c.3 years ago

ty

Angela N.
Angela N.4 years ago

thanks :)

Victor M.
Victor M.4 years ago

It's natural

Sue H.
Sue H.4 years ago

Thanks for sharing.

Autumn B.
Victoria B.4 years ago

Interesting.

Sandy Erickson
Sandy Erickson4 years ago

You have to love yourself.

Sandy Erickson
Sandy Erickson4 years ago

You have to love yourself.

Erin G.
Erin G.4 years ago

I'm afraid that I wouldn't be able to do this myself, and props to the author for managing it!