http://www.care2.com/greenliving/letting-go-of-attachment.html
Letting Go Of Attachment
Detachment is essential on the path to inner fulfillment, but it has often been confused with abandonment. The general opinion is that we must renounce the things that give us worldly pleasure in order to experience detachment, but attachment is not the same as possessing. You can have possessions without being attached, just as you can live in a cave with nothing, and be attached all the same! Attachment is about letting go of need, of the fear of loss; ultimately, it’s about finding fulfillment within ourselves, so that we no longer depend on the things or people around us for satisfaction. When this happens, you can fully enjoy the things you have, but without the fear of losing them.
What are you attached to? We are all attached to something. It might be our children, our partners, our material possessions, our jobs. Or it might be to something more subtle; our image, our ideas, our beliefs and convictions. If you ever find yourself trying to hold a position, or defend an idea, you can be sure you are attached.
Simply becoming aware of what you are attached to is the first step towards letting go. When you are conscious of an attachment, you will be able to identify the need that is attached to it, and the fear that is activated every time your attachment is threatened in some way. When this happens, go inwards and allow yourself to feel the anxiety or fear. By feeling this emotion, you will move closer to healing the emptiness that ultimately leads you to seek external fulfillment.
We think the things around us are our source of happiness, but when we let go of attachment, we discover the boundless joy that lies within. This inner experience of fullness, or love-consciousness, brings with it true freedom, for we no longer depend on that which is ever changing in order to feel complete.
Isha Judd is an internationally renowned spiritual teacher and author; her latest book and movie, Why Walk When You Can Fly? explain her system for self-love and the expansion of consciousness. Learn more at www.whywalkwhenyoucanfly.com.
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38 comments
add your comment »"What you're looking for is within you".
Prem Rawat www.wopg.org
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Wow, Jade H! "EVERYTHING YOU LOVE WILL LEAVE YOU...." I would certainly hope that some of the time, you are the one who decides that it's time to move on to something new, rather than just being passive and waiting for things to leave you. It is definitely true, however, that ALL relationships end, in one way or another. Sometimes people die, sometimes they move away and sometimes they just move on. Our spiritual lessons are about what we learn while we are in that relationship and what we learn from the end of that same relationship. There is a spiritual lesson in everything. Are we willing to put in the work to discover the lesson and apply it to our lives?
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You didn't "mis-read" it,Martin - and you ARE on track with your thinking - it may be your emotions that are not totally in line with thinking. LOL The hardest lesson for all of us to learn is that people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. We never know which it will be or how long. There is one sure thing, tho: EVERYTHING YOU LOVE WILL LEAVE YOU...UNLESS YOU DIE FIRST. And there is no guarantee for 80 years...or for the next 8 minutes(!) - and applies to all of us. So, as Yul Brynner stated in his last interview - "We are born alone and we die alone - therefore any friendships or relationships we have in between those two times should be considered as gifts in our lives!" Each of us is here to experience a "holy life" - as Wayne Dyer says: We are not human beings having a spiritual experience-we are spiritual beings having a human experience! And there are days the experience sucks canal water for sure! LOL But it will pass - and you'll find that as you change your attitude about people, you will attract like-minded people into your life. Blessed Be
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To be hpnest Chris I wish I hadn't commented on this subject and I should never have discussed a personal conversation that I can't remove. To me what you are saying is obvious we are all individual and in a sense quantum physics approaches this individual perception approach. We all interconnect at times but live our own lives never mind an inner journey. I just think family and friends are important and obviously mis-read this article.
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martin w., YOUR journey must be solo, because it is your journey. Every soul has their own journey. The people, in our lives, are people that we have met, along our path. However long their paths will run parallel to ours is unknown. Unattachment basically means realizing & accepting that the paths run parallel for only varying distances. Nobody walks YOUR path. With this realization comes the knowledge that whenever these people's paths change direction, you can & will continue on your path. In this day, this time, we have reached a higher collective awareness. We choose to follow our Holy Paths as Caroline Myss says: "Monks without monasteries".
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Chana said "Non-attachment applies to ALL relationships, whether it's a needy boyfriend or a very wise mentor. It means accepting them for the gifts they are in our lives without holding on to them."
IMO, I think that nails it.
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Carl, pursuing an attitude of non-attachment doesn't mean you're not connected to people! That would make life very lonely and unfulfilling. The whole idea behind spirituality is that we are all connected. It's about being connected without expectations for how the other will behave toward us.
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Hi all, I agree to a certain extent. True joy does come from within. Being happy in yourself and of yourself is essential to a peaceful existence based on love and not fear. However, sharing this with another or others is equally as fulfilling. I certainly agree that we should not rely on others to bring us joy but I don't believe being connected to someone or something is necessarily a bad thing. It's all about your point of view.
Be happy with yourself and be conscious of how you treat others and the universe will reward you for it. It's all about being present in the now!
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I agree with you, Martin. Non-attachment applies to ALL relationships, whether it's a needy boyfriend or a very wise mentor. It means accepting them for the gifts they are in our lives without holding on to them. Allowing relationships, and people - even those we love - to be part of the flow.
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Maybe so Chana. I'm not saying I agree with controlling relationships. But I agree with Mary. The statement We think the things around us are our source of happiness, but when we let go of attachment, we discover the boundless joy that lies within. This inner experience of fullness, or love-consciousness, brings with it true freedom, for we no longer depend on that which is ever changing in order to feel complete" Some people feel complete with the things around them. The person I was referring to says they don't need a "needy" man in their life (that is their choice) demanding their time. But they seem to require a guru (who is a man) to help to fill this void and require their time and appraisal. Each to their own I guess.
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