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Making Mistakes

Making Mistakes

I’m feeling embarrassed because I’ve made a series of silly mistakes.  I run retreats internationally in which people come together to experience a spiritual awakening to oneness and “big love,” so I regularly send out emails to tell people about new events. In my last email I managed to get the details wrong, so I sent out an apology and the correction.  Then I realized I’d got other details wrong as well, so I had to send out another email to apologize.

Making mistakes is a part of life … at least it is a consistent part of my life! Yet I am always shocked when I see how easily I don’t pay enough attention to what I am doing. And this has got me thinking about how I feel when I make mistakes.

Getting the dates wrong on an email is a relatively minor mistake, but I still feel annoyed with myself.  I prefer it when I am pleased myself, of course.  Yet I also feel there is something precious in the humility that arises when I see my innate fallibility … with both the big and little things in my life.

Humbly embracing my flawed humanity has been a theme of my life in recent years, and is a major element in my new book that is coming out next year.  For a long time my spiritual journey was about waking up to the deep self and the oneness of life, and this remains an ongoing adventure.  But now I find myself also focusing on coming to terms with the limitations of “Tim” that show no signs of miraculously disappearing!

As I get older I am struck by how “Tim” still stumbles and falls.  Humility and embarrassment seem like old friends.  And there is a vulnerability and authenticity that arises from the recognition of my human fallibility that I am learning to appreciate.  Connecting with each other and with life from the deep self is a wonderful experience.  Yet embracing each other in our vulnerable, fragile, tender humanity is equally important.

It seems to me that I am profoundly paradoxical.  On the one hand so big and on the other so small.  Within me are unfathomable depths, yet “Tim” is also necessarily limited and imperfect.  On my spiritual journey I once believed that I could one day perfect “Tim” into some sort of enlightened being who was always at his best.  Now it feels to me that the journey is about embracing all that I am.

This means both awakening to the deep self and humbly accepting my human limitations.  It is when I am able to do both that I am truly authentic.  And then something beautiful and tender happens. There is this unconditionally love of myself just as I am … a love of others just as they are … a love of life just as it is … a deep love of being.

I shared these ideas with my emailing list when I apologized for my mistakes.  And here’s the funny thing.  I got more lovely replies to that email than to any other email I’ve sent out. So what I am learning is this:  People respond when we’re real about ourselves.  When we’re willing to be authentic it allows others to be authentic too.  And that feels good.

Read more: Guidance, Inspiration, Life, Love, Mental Wellness, Peace, Self-Help, Spirit, , , ,

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Tim Freke

Tim Freke is a pioneering philosopher and bestselling author who is often featured in the global media. He runs ‘mystery experience retreats’ internationally, in which he guides others directly to a spiritually awakened state.


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1:02PM PDT on May 19, 2012

mistakes are ok--failures are what lead to future successes

3:56PM PST on Mar 5, 2012

... Is only human... or is it exclusively?

3:52PM PST on Mar 5, 2012 only human!

9:33PM PST on Feb 14, 2012

As long as you learn from the mistakes - then they are not "bad"

Lots of mistakes are made at work every day (on the global scale) and a lot can be learned from them...and the measure of the individuals who participated in the "failure" can be taken when you see how they respond to it.

9:47AM PST on Feb 14, 2012

Thankyou, what's that saying to err is human.

6:54AM PST on Feb 14, 2012

Chad is right, a good comment.

My Dad used to say that the person who never made a mistake never made anything.

1:32AM PST on Feb 14, 2012

We learn from our mistakes thanks for sharing the article

10:28PM PST on Feb 13, 2012

Thank you.

8:56PM PST on Feb 13, 2012

This is a great article, mistakes happen we try to learn from them and then move on.

8:27PM PST on Feb 13, 2012

This is a great article. I am like this too. I am also like the lady above who talked about how easy she is on others when they make mistakes and hard on herself. I am too. I tell people exactly what I need to tell myself, that it's okay, we're all human, and nobody's perfect. Hmmmm...... thank you for that reminded. Now...for it to sink in. lol

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