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Sexuality On The Spiritual Path

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Sexuality On The Spiritual Path

Sometimes I feel like I am surrounded by people on a spiritual path.  I am slow to the rolling cauldron of the New Age.  I love it and yet sometimes – parts of it can make my eyes roll back in my head

For instance – for the longest time I thought that “yoga” was a series of twists and pretzel back-bends that were completely beyond me. I only partially understood that the yoga poses which I struggled with were also spiritual, but I never connected yoga with tantra (which apparently is an arm of yoga) or with any kind of mental activity such as meditation.

Yet, there I was at the famous Chopra Center in Southern California seeking enlightenment, and it felt like all of my worlds were finally connecting in a eureka kind of explosion.

It was just before another meditation and sutra lesson, when Deepak Chopra helped it all come together for me when he began to teach us about the second chakra which I always understood to be the chakra of sexuality, fertility, family and creativity. As an Integrative Life Coach who specializes in issues of women – the second chakra was so up my alley! My ears were perked – Deepak had my full attention.

Deepak surprised me, when he began by saying that “spirituality and sexual energy were connected. No life would exist without the other.” While reaching for the gap of silence in the morning meditation that followed, my mind began to think of all of the ways that we could enhance the spiritual aspect of our sexuality. Many people have written about using yoga to increase sexual energy and performance. Some, like a recent blog by the renown yoga teacher Ana Forrest, have written about using yoga to support sexual healing.

So why couldn’t we use affirmations and meditations to also bring us to a new level and ease in our relationship to our sexuality and pleasure? Why couldn’t we have enlightened sex?

Taking it even further, why couldn’t we apply The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success to support people in having more connected, healing, and pleasurable sexual experiences? What if we could turn sexual desire into pure potentiality instead of making it focused on climax or even baby making?

I have written extensively on what I call the “Organic Orgasm” or “Slow Sex” where I encourage people to let go of their absolute need for climax in every sexual experience. Instead I introduce the idea of being less goal oriented in our lovemaking and more pleasure driven.

In essence I realized, that I was bringing in what Deepak Chopra calls “The Law of Detachment” into the bedroom and into our sexuality. Who knew? I didn’t until I heard Deepak explain The Law of Detachment from The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success to a room of over 300 avid learners. Now, I doubt that Dr. Chopra knew that I was going to take The Law of Detachment into the bedroom. But you never know who is listening right?

In the The Law of Detachment, we are asked to let our actions be blissfully free from attachment to outcome. Now how does that relate to sex? Let me enlighten you while I introduce to you the components of The Law of Detachment.

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Pamela Madsen

Pamela Madsen is an Integrative Life Coach Specializing In Women's Issues: Sexuality, Fertility, Body Image, Wellness and Rejuvenation. Pamela is also author of the best selling memoir Shameless (Rodale, Jan 2011), and founder of The American Fertility Association.Her websites and her daily blog,, are a breakfast essential for reporters, writers and policymakers.


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5:18AM PST on Jan 17, 2012

physical relationship without spiritual is body without soul

12:22PM PST on Dec 16, 2011


1:06PM PST on Dec 13, 2011


8:50AM PST on Dec 13, 2011

complete openness and abandonment, trust and focus
equals pure energy

9:37PM PST on Dec 10, 2011

My 20something guys do 3 hour sessions and we are hot and sensual together. It couldn't be more joyful. It feels very spiritual and heavenly but these articles always bring imaginary gods and imaginary afterlife into sex. My point is sex in and of itself is love, it's estacy, it's beyond words and it's totally animal. The estacy of sex, however, is not connected whatsoever with any fairy gods or pie heavens, it only feels that way. Orgasms are fantastic and I love every one of them. They feel out of this world, but they are not. The only reason a girl would have to put herself in a trance or get drunk before she has sex is because she isn't sexually attracted to the guy. It's much more joyful if she's hot for him.

5:49PM PST on Dec 10, 2011

I enjoyed this article and I don't think it is hypnosis or trance like it is awareness of the moment without expectations. That could be Jane B's animal moment or a total emersion into the moment at hand. Either way I bet someone is finding joy or at least I hope so. I notice my dog when you give it a nice piece of steak he will swallow it without even bothering to chew and taste it. I think that is what seperates us from animals we can take the time to enjoy and savor.

2:39AM PST on Dec 10, 2011

Try astral sex!

12:45AM PST on Dec 10, 2011

sexuality on a spiritual path= are you kidding me? you are in love or you are not. that sums it up pretty much vs. all that bs.

9:51PM PST on Dec 9, 2011

thank you! I love this! :)

6:31PM PST on Dec 9, 2011

Lloyd, thanks for your thoughts. This should not be "Sexuality on the Spiritual Path" but
"Sexuality on the Physical Path". We need to first have animal sexual attraction and then
long sessions of hot sex. If a woman is attracted to a man, there is no need to meditate or
put herself in a trance or get drunk to enjoy sex. If a woman has to do self hypnosis to have sex with a man, then she is with the wrong man. The only time a woman needs "sexual healing" is when she is turned off by the man. She should just go find another guy who turns her on. ;)

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