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Decreasing Drama in Your Life

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Decreasing Drama in Your Life

If you think you’re constantly getting barraged with other people’s drama, consider this: most drama in people’s lives is internal. If we had a microphone that could record our thoughts or feelings, we’d be astonished by how much emotional upheaval we’re adding to both the big and little stresses in our lives.
For example, your husband is late for dinner. You start worrying and building possible terrible scenarios in your mind: he was in a car accident…he was mugged…he is two-timing you. Then he arrives home apologetic for being late and that he couldn’t call you because his phone ran out of battery. Whew. Then you have to recover from all that story you created in your head, and the resulting energy drain that left you exhausted.

It’s a habit that’s so common – we learn it from our parents and our friends. Teenagers thrive on inner drama; it’s no wonder so many struggle emotionally to learn in school. Excessive drama causes stress, anxiety, anger and blame, draining our energy and, if chronic, damaging our health and relationships.
Stressful negative emotions put our hearts and brains out of sync. They trigger our sympathetic nervous systems to go into survival mode, increasing cortisol and adrenalin. They shut down our higher cortical functions like reasoning, problem-solving, intuition, creativity, and heart connection so we can’t think clearly or be present for others.

When we’re mentally over-stimulated from drama, it’s easy to take things personally and just react instead of respond. An incident may or may not be real, but left to its own devices, it gains momentum. The mind starts to feed on it, we build a story in our heads and get worked up about it. Our body doesn’t care if it’s justified or not, it still reacts and we pay the price.

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Deborah, from HeartMath

Deborah Rozman, Ph.D., is President and CEO of the for-profit Quantum Intech Inc (dba HeartMath Inc.) Deborah has been deeply committed to awareness development and personal growth for 40 years. Deborah is co-author with Doc Childre of Transforming Anger, Transforming Stress, Transforming Anxiety, Transforming Depression and Stopping Emotional Eating.


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1:38PM PST on Jan 5, 2013

1:37PM PST on Jan 5, 2013

5:24AM PST on Dec 22, 2012

Some of your initial comments ring so true! It's not that easy to steer clear of drama if family members tend to be dramatic - I think we all need some space to ourselves in order to analyse stressful situations and come up with the best solutions and coping strategies.

4:17AM PST on Dec 15, 2012

thanks for sharing

7:11AM PST on Dec 10, 2012

I have decreased drama 90% from my life when I did not spend the holidays with my toxic relatives. The only person I spent the holidays with is my son and he is one of the most positive people I know. I like to think I have contributed to him being a positive, caring, and loving soul.

5:44PM PST on Dec 9, 2012

Thanks for the article. I try to streer clear of drama by avoiding people who always seem to be in a state of crisis or feel the need to constantly bad-mouth others.

7:21PM PST on Dec 3, 2012

worth pondering

2:25PM PST on Dec 1, 2012


2:15PM PST on Dec 1, 2012

Thank you.

12:41AM PST on Dec 1, 2012

To worry is to meditate and pray for what you DON'T want.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

people are talking

good words here... my favorite is Laugh at every opportunity. Thanks, Janet.

Thank you for sharing!

Interesting article, thank you!

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