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The Foreplay Cure

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The Foreplay Cure

“Sex without foreplay is like song’s refrain without the intro.”   Toba Beta

I have been grappling with the statistic that the average amount of foreplay that couples engage in is between 1-4 minutes as reported on a recent Dr. Oz segment.

I don’t doubt it, because I have received my share of calls and emails from customers who have shared similar stories and then wondered why the lubricant didn’t work.  I am sorry to be the messenger here, but the best, most magical lube in the world is the foreplay.

When I sell my bottles of lube one by one at conferences and trade shows, I say this to our customers:  “Lubricant is the grand finale,  the bottle you reach for when you can’t stand it anymore.  This is when lubricant can do its real job of extending the pleasure,  comfort and glide of sensitive tissue in friction.  I also tell them not to waste it on someone they don’t love,  which is the other great secret about lubricant, it works better in the presence of loving energy given intimately.

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Read more: Love, Making Love Sustainable, Relationships, Sex,

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Wendy Strgar

Wendy Strgar, founder and CEO of Good Clean Love, is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love, intimacy and family.  In her new book, Love that Works: A Guide to Enduring Intimacy,  she tackles the challenging issues of sustaining relationships and healthy intimacy with an authentic and disarming style and simple yet innovative adviceIt has been called "the essential guide for relationships."  The book is available on ebook.  Wendy has been married for 27 years to her husband, a psychiatrist, and lives with their four children ages 13- 22 in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.

21 comments

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10:13AM PST on Dec 1, 2012

Thank your for sharing.

6:40AM PDT on Nov 4, 2011

Thanks for the article.

10:47AM PDT on Aug 7, 2011

Add 10 Minutes!!!? BS!

Foreplay starts the minute intercourse ends and continues until the next occasion of connection!

Don't be satisfied ( you won't be) with anything less.

9:38AM PDT on Aug 7, 2011

Good article, thanks.

5:51PM PDT on Aug 6, 2011

thank you!

7:26AM PDT on Aug 5, 2011

thanks

2:13AM PDT on Aug 5, 2011

I could be wrong here, but I have a feeling it is mostly men who would like to move things along - at a faster pace! If you men like sex that much, the more foreplay that happens, the more sex you will get in the long run. We LOOOOVE the foreplay, and you LOOOOVE sex, so why not do BOTH - more than a couple of minutes, if at all possible.

It worked with me!! One guy, I knew, was a master at the foreplay, and believe me, I was all over him - on a regular basis!!! It does work...and I am guessing that most women would agree with me. WE'D BE ALL OVER YOU...YOU WOULD PROBABLY HAVE TO TAKE 'SEX-BREAKS'!!!

2:01AM PDT on Aug 5, 2011

As much as i like and am a proponent of long tender loving, a quickie is not a bad idea from time to time. especially if you have small children. children affect your sex life a lot i think. my wife and i actually have to plan a good time together. And the weekends are like a honeymoon. and yes we have never used lube because we spend enough time in foreplay as well as afterplay.

So wine 'er', dine ér and 69 'er'.

7:34PM PDT on Aug 4, 2011

Interesting... very!

4:30PM PDT on Aug 4, 2011

Amanda M(says) Like a sign says that I saw once: "There are no frigid women-only inadequate men!"


Amanda, if you believe this sign you read, then perhaps your one of the reasons that all these men are so inadequate in the first place.

Like someone said above, women are all different in their needs and desires, so its up to the woman to point out those needs and desires , so men can give you what you want.

We are not all out here for self satisfaction. Most,if you take the time to listen, are out more to satisfy their woman. this gives us more enjoyment than the actual orgasm .....Spend some time. Teach your guy what you need, and I'm sure he won't be so inadequate next time.

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