Unhappy in Love? Here’s Why

If you find yourself chronically unhappy in relationships (or in general) it may be time to examine some of your self-limiting beliefs about life and love. Break the spell by witnessing the beliefs that hold you back: we all need more love in the world!

Do you believe you have a right to happiness? Examine the following statements to see if any sound like your beliefs. If they do, write down what would be the opposite of those statements and begin thinking about how it would feel to incorporate these new beliefs into your life.

* I believe my purpose in life is not to enjoy but to endure.

* Others always come first.

* Loyalty to others comes at the expense of loyalty to myself: I am motivated by indebtedness, history, guilt, pity.

* I continually deny my self-protective instinct.

* I cannot speak up about or change or leave a relationship because that might hurt someone else. I say to myself, “You made your bed, now lie in it.”

* Before I claim my own power or fulfill my needs, I must first make others happy.

* As long as I keep my partner happy, my relationship is successful.

* I am willing to let my partner injure my heart.

Adapted from How to Be An Adult in Relationships, by David Richo (Shambhala, 2002). Copyright (c) 2002 by David Richo. Reprinted by permission of Shambhala.
Adapted from How to Be An Adult in Relationships, by David Richo (Shambhala, 2002).

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16 comments

Duane B.
.3 years ago

Thank you for sharing.

Elena T.
Elena Poensgen3 years ago

Thank you :)

Patricia H.
Patricia H.3 years ago

thanks for posting

Teresa Wlosowicz
Teresa W.4 years ago

Unfortunately, the only source of hapiness is money.

Teresa Wlosowicz
Teresa W.4 years ago

Love doesn't exist!

Robert O.
Robert O.4 years ago

Very true. Thanks.

Phil Smith
Phil Smith4 years ago

Annie ,, You might want to consider rewriting this.. Not everyone has your level of understanding.. Thank You..

Past Member
Marisela R.4 years ago

Thank you for the information

Linda McKellar
Past Member 4 years ago

I can't understand why people feel they need to be "in love" to be happy. I never have been & like my independence and solitude.

Lamia Albero
Past Member 4 years ago

Yikes.. All true but very difficult to change those bad habits and patterns... I know all too well... Hi my name is Lamia and Im a recovering people-pleaser :)