We are giving away a copy of Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships by Arielle Ford. Check out this Q&A with the author, then leave a comment for your chance to win the book!
What is Wabi Sabi?
It is an ancient Japanese art form that honors all things old, weathered, worn, imperfect, and impermanent by finding the beauty in the imperfections. For instance, if you had a large vase with a big crack down the middle of it, a Japanese art museum would put the vase on a pedestal and shine a light on the crack, or they might fill the crack with 24k gold!
Wabi Sabi Love is devoted to exploring the simple, fun, and effective ways to apply this concept to our love relationships through stories and exercises that demonstrate how to attain groundbreaking shifts in perception so that you can embrace and find the beauty and perfection in each other’s imperfections. I call this “going from annoyed to enjoyed”!
Why did you write this book?
My previous book, The Soulmate Secret, unveiled the principles for attracting love. I found that my married friends were asking me for a book that would “turn my mate back into my soulmate.” One of the greatest myths in our society is that once we find our soulmate, our relationship will be effortless. If only! According to psychologist and researcher Dr. John Gottman, nearly every happily married couple has around ten irreconcilable differences. The top two are money and kids. The other biggies are sex, in-laws, housework, communication, balance between home and work, and political views. Wabi Sabi Love is a book that offers ways to turn conflict into compassion and create a more loving relationship. It shows you how to cultivate love for yourself and your partner, especially on the days when one of you is acting out, refusing to listen, or shutting down.
What is the benefit of Wabi Sabi Love?
Here are the sad but true facts about marriage today: 50 percent of first marriages, 67 percent of second marriages, and 74 percent of third marriages all end in divorce. Modern-day society has conditioned us to seek perfection, which leads to an ongoing state of frustration and dissatisfaction. In truth, we all know that perfection is not possible. But with Wabi Sabi Love, we can come to appreciate our own and the other’s imperfection, and can actually experience a more natural state of grace than we thought possible.
By practicing Wabi Sabi Love, you learn to accept the flaws, imperfections, and limitations—as well as the gifts and blessings—that form your shared history as a couple. Acceptance and its counterpart, under- standing, are crucial to achieving relationship harmony. It’s the highest form of love, and, like most things worth striving for in life, it requires patience, commitment, personal responsibility, and practice. Imagine how great you will feel when you know your partner loves all of you all the time—the good, the bad, and everything in between!