Wisdom from Ed Brodow

Let’s consider why so many people hate to negotiate. This negative attitude stems from the perception that a negotiation is a contest, which can’t be won unless someone else loses. But the thought that someone has to lose can produce anxiety because it means that the loser could be you. Some people become consumed by the fear of losing, thinking about what might happen if things don’t go their way. Before they know it, their stomach is tied up in knots and they feel like they are going to be sick.

Some people believe that Donald Trump is the consummate negotiator. Trump represents the old-style, in-your-face approach to dealmaking. I prefer to use Peter Falk’s classic TV detective Columbo as a better role model for a negotiator.

Why? Columbo is known for keeping a leash on his own ego. He asks questions, listens to others, and solves problems. Columbo is a reasonable man with a strong sense of humility. Unlike Trump, his objective is uncovering the truth, not winning a war of egos.

In place of the Trump model, I propose a collaborative approach to negotiation in which both sides can consider themselves winners. This eliminates the anxiety over the outcome and allows us to enjoy the process. Contrary to popular belief, negotiation is not really about winning, it is about collaborating….Continue reading at InspireMeToday.com.

Ed is a negotiation expert and the author of Negotiation Boot Camp: How to Resolve Conflict, Satisfy Customers, and Make Better Deals.

Photo Credit: Max Elman

Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

Lost A.

4:36AM PDT on Mar 26, 2012

Thanx.

send a green star

Danuta W.

1:04AM PDT on Mar 17, 2012

Thanks for the info.

Eternal G.

4:46PM PST on Feb 21, 2012

4:45PM PST on Feb 21, 2012

Who?

Emil P.

8:08PM PST on Feb 3, 2012

attractive art work thanks for sharing

Robert O.

4:36PM PST on Feb 3, 2012

Nice. Thanks.

Mary B.

8:49PM PST on Jan 31, 2012

This co-operative style really needs to be brought front and center because the old way is always about ego personalities and the need to be 'right' which gets us no where except going in circles, repeating talking points and blameing. Every member of congress needs to be intensely educated in this style and required to put it to use daily in the work of government. I think doing this would very quickly expose any hidden agendas, and remind them that they represent us and they are unable to do so if they don't tell the whole story. Any assumption that facts are accurate need to be suspended. Their training should begin immediately.

Vicki P.

11:37AM PST on Jan 30, 2012

Thanks for the article

Marianna B M.

11:33AM PST on Jan 30, 2012

noted

Quanta K.

11:28AM PST on Jan 30, 2012

Thanks.