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Obama Shaken By Boehner's Support -- Andy Borowitz

Society & Culture  (tags: americans, culture, Humor, Satire, society )

- 1720 days ago -
After putting down the phone with Mr. Boehner, the President reportedly told aides, "Boehner's supporting it. That's so weird. This is still a good idea, right?" **HUMOR***SATIRE***

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Kit B (276)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 8:19 am
Photo Credit: Photograph by Dennis Brack-Pool/Getty.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Aides to President Obama said today that he was “visibly shaken” after receiving support from House Speaker John Boehner for his Syria campaign, adding that the Speaker’s vote of confidence was “making him rethink the whole thing.”

An aide to Mr. Obama, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said that he was in the Oval Office with the President when he got the call from Mr. Boehner: “As it became clear that Boehner was going to support him on this, he looked more and more stunned. He was trying to stay calm and all but you could see that he was really taken aback.”

After putting down the phone with Mr. Boehner, the President reportedly told aides, “Boehner’s supporting it. That’s so weird. This is still a good idea, right?”

Moments after the President had “seemed to settle down,” the aide said, he received a phone call from House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, who also offered his support for the Syria plan.

“That one really rattled him,” the aide said. “He was like, ‘I think I need to take a long walk.’”

The calls from Mr. Boehner and Mr. Cantor have created what the aide called “the biggest crisis of confidence this President has ever experienced.”

“I checked in on him later in the day, just to see if he was O.K.,” the aide said. “He was cradling his head in his hands saying, ‘I just don’t know. I just don’t know anymore.’”

While the President’s plan to attack Syria remains on the table, the aide indicated that the situation is very fluid: “If Rand Paul calls today and says he’s in, the whole thing goes away.”

By: Andy Borowitz | The New Yorker Magazine |

***HUMOR ****SATIRE***

JL A (281)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 8:54 am
Thanks for the dose of AB Kit--this odd alliance does make one wonder what they see that is hidden from the rest of us.

Arielle S (313)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 11:14 am
ROFLOL - hilarious! Of course, in reality, we're all a little suspicious anyway, aren't we?

Lois Jordan (63)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 5:39 pm
Thanks for the giggles, Kit. Another "bit" of reality here is that Obama, indeed, took a long walk on the White House lawn prior to giving his press conference.

Bryna Pizzo (139)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 6:59 pm
Oh, thank you for the laughter. I didn't think I could laugh after the "Five Minutes to Midnight" article. You have saved my sanity, Kit!

Joanne Dixon (38)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 7:25 pm
Well, um, er, no, it's really not a good idea. Putting aside all speculation on what it could lead to, the treaty to which we are a sgnatory and which covers this, requires all violations to be referred to the International Court at the Hague. So, in order not to violate our own treaty, that is what we should do, and only that. (No, I'm not that smart, I learned it from Alan Grayson.)

Rose Becke (141)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 9:26 pm
Brilliant Kit :)

Helen Porter (39)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 10:48 pm
The occupant of the white house is so accustomed to the glares of hatred from Boehner he just doesn't know how to handle approval.

Helen Porter (39)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 10:52 pm
It would be a good idea to let the obscene murderers fight it out among themselves.

The USA's first step could lead to nuclear war.

fly bird (26)
Wednesday September 4, 2013, 11:39 pm
Thanks. Obama's instincts are telling him something, I suspect.
I'm sure he knows a lot more about congressional bartering than most.

Interesting recent report:
"U.S. Jewish groups call on Congress to approve use of force against Syria's Assad."

"AIPAC To Congress; Authorize Action." 9/13/13


Stan B (123)
Thursday September 5, 2013, 1:33 am
I can't help thinking Obama's threats to take action against Syria are an indirect warning to Iran to stop their dash towards nuclear weapons.
Who knows?

Stan B (123)
Thursday September 5, 2013, 1:34 am
You cannot currently send a star to Kit because you have done so within the last day.

TomCat S (129)
Thursday September 5, 2013, 2:13 am
Great minds fall in the same ditch! ;-)

Jo S (619)
Friday September 6, 2013, 9:01 am
Excellent, Bravo Kit! ;~))
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