Finding Your Soulmate: Do’s and Don’ts

Everyone knows February 14 is the worst day of the year to be single. But according to Monte Farber and Amy Zerner, authors of The Soulmate Path: Find the Love You Want and Strengthen the Love You Have (Weiser Books, Feb. 2010), you can lift your spirits this year while getting on the path to finding the love of your life.

Here are their tips designed to ensure that this will be the last Valentine’s Day you spend alone:

DO listen actively to others, no matter what they are discussing. Even if it’s a chat with your Mom, give her your time and full attention. This is great practice for interacting with new friends, including the soulmate who awaits you down the path.

DON’T bug your friends by bewailing your solo state on Valentine’s Day. This is a sure path to boring and potentially losing the companions you have while doing nothing about meeting new people who share your interests.

DO enjoy simple pleasures. Purchase and arrange some flowers. Freshen up your bedding. Enjoy the freedom of making your own schedule.

DON’T forget that alone time will be more rare and require scheduling, once you have found your soulmate.

DO appreciate the present moment and live it fully.

DON’T allow unwanted thoughts to ruin the moment. Wear a rubber band on your wrist. When downbeat thoughts intrude, snap yourself back into the present moment by snapping the rubber band.

DO get out for the evening. While dinnertime on Valentine’s Day may, indeed, be a depressing time to dine solo in a couple-packed restaurant, it is still an evening when you can get out for a stroll in the snow, a browse in your favorite bookstore, a visit to a museum, or even a trip to the gym. Not only will these venues put you in the company of people who share your interests, but it’s a very good bet that the people you meet in these places on February 14 are also un-partnered.

DON’T languish at home.

DO give yourself chocolates. Just because you are not dining out with a date does not mean you don’t deserve a favorite food on this day.

DON’T get drunk or otherwise stoned. That will only make it much easier to indulge in every DON’T on this list.

Monte Farber and Amy Zerner are the authors of The Soulmate Path: Find the Love You Want and Strengthen the Love You Have (Weiser Books). They have combined their deep love for one another with a lifetime of inner exploration and self-discovery to create The Enchanted World of Amy Zerner and Monte Farber books, card decks, and oracles that have helped millions on their spiritual paths.


Samantha Shira
Samantha Shira5 years ago


Abbe A.
Azaima A5 years ago


Michele Wilkinson

Thank you

Melissah C.
Melissah C6 years ago


Sue Matheson
Sue Matheson7 years ago

good advice

Gordana Roljic
Gordana Roljic7 years ago

thanx for article...

Gordana Roljic
Gordana Roljic7 years ago

thanx for article

Elaine Silva
Elaine Silva7 years ago


Loesje vB
Loesje Najoan7 years ago

Very lovely....thanks :)

Ruth R.
Ruth R7 years ago

Thanks. Shared, saved, will look at.