Marriage Traditions We Should Reconsider (and New Ones to Adopt)

Not everyone wants to get married. Millennials are thumbing their nose at the tradition, but theyíre not the only ones. Fewer people in general are getting married nowadays.

Marriage might not be on everyoneís bucket list, but if youíve decided to get hitched thereís no need to buy into the many traditions synonymous with the institution. Itís 2018, you can†wear whatever color dress you like on your big day.

OLD TRADITIONS THAT CAN GO

1.†Big, Expensive Weddings

Speaking of big days, thereís also no need for it to be an elaborate affair with hundreds of guests. The days of inviting extended family members and work colleagues you donít even like are long gone.

Rather than blow your savings, or worse, get into debt, for a one-off celebration, save your money for a trip around the world, a honeymoon of a lifetime or a deposit on your first home.

Along with being expensive, big weddings are also super stressful. A far better idea is to share the occasion with a small group of close friends and family members. Thereís also no reason you canít just elope. Itís entirely up to you.

So often, we do things to please other people. Compromise is fine if youíre choosing a restaurant or movie, for example, but how you get married is your business. You really donít have to go the big fat Greek wedding route if thatís not your style.

2. Ixnay on the Gender Roles

If you do opt for a full on affair, there are still plenty of wedding traditions you can skip. For one thing, the old school rule that bridesmaids should be female and groomsmen male can†definitely be tossed out the window.

Thereís no reason whatsoever why the the best man canít be a best woman. If youíre the bride and your BFF is a guy, by all means, ask him to be your Ďbridesmaid.í Just donít call him that and definitely donít ask him to wear a dress.

3. No More Matchy, Matchy

In the past, the bride and groomís wedding bands had to match. Just because you fell in love doesnít mean you automatically have the same taste. Youíre still individuals, so go ahead and†express that.

While weíre on the subject of matching, your bridal party should be free to wear whatever they like. Forcing them into a style or color that doesnít suit them purely because Ďthatís how itís doneí is so 1987.

For that matter, go crazy on your wedding colors if thatís how you roll. Eclectic for the win, baby. Choose as many colors as you like for your big day. Just because old school rules say you can only have two shades, doesnít mean you have to.

NEW TRADITIONS THAT ACTUALLY MAKE SENSE

Most wedding traditions came about centuries ago. They likely made sense at the time, but thatís not reason enough to hang onto them. We need to come up with new wedding traditions that speak to our time.

Make the ceremony a Ďno cell phoneí zone. We humans are unreasonably attached to our devices, but thereís no reason for guests to be checking emails while youíre exchanging vows. They also donít need to be taking photos either. They can Instagram to their heartís content at the reception, this part is just for you and your person.

Writing (and receiving) a pre-wedding letter is another new tradition worth adopting. It’s really romantic and it’s something you only have to share with each other (i.e. no weighing in from busybody in-laws).

In the old days it was considered bad luck to see each other before the ceremony, but first looks are the thing nowadays. Sure, they might spoil the surprise, but it’s also pretty special having one last ‘not married yet’ moment together.

There are more wedding traditions and superstitions than you can shake a stick at. Some are fun, some are silly, some are downright ridiculous. Ancient Romans apparently studied pig entrails to determine the luckiest time to marry. I think we can safely ditch that one.

Focus instead on celebrating your love in a way that speaks to you as a couple. Don’t get too hung up on the details of what is ultimately just one day (unless youíre from Morocco, in which case†celebrations will†continue for up to seven days). You have a lifetime of fun and laughter to look forward to, so does it really matter how many tiers your wedding cake has?

Photo Credit: Pixabay

70 comments

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RK R
RK R9 days ago

Both our bridesmaids were police canines. Our groomsman was the bailiff. The officiating judge - a former divorce attorney. Our witnesses were parents. Wedding cost 75 dollars. Wedding flowers provided by the Parks and Rec Dept.

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tanzy t
tanzy t12 days ago

Make your day about your love

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Jan S
Jan S12 days ago

thanks for sharing

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Jessica K
Jessica K13 days ago

Most people were certain I would regret it for a lifetime if I didn't have 5000 people at the wedding like it was 'supposed' to be. A quarter a century later, still no regrets that it was less than three dozen there. Thanks.

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Trish K
Trish K19 days ago

When I got married 53 years ago, both of my bridesmaids were men. One life, do it your way.

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Past Member
Past Member 27 days ago

noted

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Margie FOURIE
Margie FOURIE28 days ago

It is between you and your partner. If you need to have close family around, make it a small gathering.

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Angela J
Angela J29 days ago

Thanks

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