Polyamory and the Ethics of Open Relationships

You’ve likely heard the term used before, but what exactly is polyamory?

Quite simply, polyamory is the practice of engaging in loving relationships with more than one person at a time. These are oftentimes intimate and sexual relationships, where those involved have complete knowledge and consent of the particulars of their non-monogamous relationship.

Consent from everyone involved is key—it’s what separates ethical open relationships from what feels like cheating or unfaithful behavior.

Why Polyamory?

The sexual revolution of the ’60s sparked some very prolific realizations in terms of relationships and love. People began to question the merits of traditional marriages, as non-monogamous endeavors started to become realistic and more accepted.

But what fueled this important new wave of open relationships?

Simply put, poly people realize that love is an infinite resource. Love doesn’t have to be confined to the popular notion that one person must invest everything they have and all of their love into one other person.

When a person is able to unlock the potentials of this new concept of love, it can help accentuate self-love and a better understanding of oneself.

Communication is Key

Polyamorous relationships aren’t always easy. They require intricate levels of balanced communication.

As in any form of relationship, clear communication between partners should be at the forefront of every relationship obstacle.

The emotion of jealousy is also something that may be difficult to overcome within polyamory, especially at first. Alleviating jealous tendencies and understanding jealousy and insecurities takes a lot of work, no matter what a relationship looks like. No one ever said it was going to be easy.

Approaching jealousy head-on is a great approach. Start by analyzing what the true source of jealousy is and work from there, all while keeping an open dialogue with partners.

Rather than reacting immediately to jealousy in a way that is standoffish or taking an offended or hurtful path, talk through the emotion. Ask questions and speak your mind. And most importantly don’t remain passive when you feel jealous: it will happen and that’s okay!

Poly relationships are complicated at first and require a lot of self-education in order to be healthy and project happiness in a unique way. But if you crave infinite levels of love and sexuality, it’s all worth it in the long run.

For more in depth information about opening up your ideologies on relationships I recommend two books that were enlightening to me: More than Two and The Ethical Slut. These books are resources that are healthy starting points, which answer many corollary questions both simple and intricate. Also, check out this Care2 article titled Marriage Beyond Monogamy.

Please post any additional info or resources on polyamory that have been helpful or eye opening in the comments section below!

Written by Robert Parmer

Robert Parmer is a freelance web writer and student of Boise State University and chef. Outside of writing and reading adamantly he enjoys creating and recording music, caring for his pet cat, and commuting by bicycle whenever possible.

120 comments

Olga Nycz-Shirley
Olga N5 months ago

TY.

SEND
Steve McCrea
Steve McCrea5 months ago

I find keeping up with one partner to be more than enough challenge. I can see planning for flings if both people TRULY agree, but really having two ongoing relationships seems like a LOT more trouble than it's worth!

SEND
Jetana A
Jetana A7 months ago

I admire folks who successfully maintain polyamorous relationships. Challenging due to lack of cultural support!

SEND
Wilde Thange
Wilde Thange7 months ago

It could be a form of group marriage that is ecologically sane for a world where there are problems with just two people just maintaining a home and financial security at the same time. Having an emotional and financial bond for survival should be able to counter jealousy and conflict much better that diads that are made for conflict and insecurity behind closed door in padded cells that can hide spousal, substance and child abuse.
More people sharing for less consumerism and waste and more skill sets to rely on.

SEND
Tania N
Tania Nabout a year ago

Thanks for sharing

SEND
Jerome S
Jerome Sabout a year ago

thanks

SEND
Jim Ven
Jim Venabout a year ago

thanks for sharing.

SEND
Leong S
Leong S1 years ago

thanks you

SEND
Nang Hai C
Nang Hai C1 years ago

Thank you.

SEND
Mariana L
Mariana L1 years ago

Thank you for sharing

SEND