Unhealed Black Holes

We are now at the level of inner need where the spiritual concept of “I am enough” is truly critical; as long as you dwell on more superficial levels of need, as long as you lean on a stronger person to carry you through, the anxiety of separation is disguised – and that may be what you need for the moment. It takes real spiritual commitment to expose the wounds of separation hidden in the unconscious.

If you look deep enough these wounds show up as black holes in your sense of self. Like black holes in space, which suck energy out of the universe, the psyche’s black holes suck out your confidence, your sense of worth, your certainty that you can survive.

When you approach just a small one of these holes, you can experience a drastic range of sensations, none of them pleasant. Mild uneasiness and disembodiedness give way to nervousness, dizziness, nausea, vertigo, anxiety, panic, terror, and dread, depending upon how close you come to the black hole.

Sometimes there seems to be a hole in your chest or abdomen, or a suffocating pressure, as if all the air was being sucked out of your lungs. Terrible as these feelings are, they have no spiritual reality; they are conditioned reactions. Stored-up fear magnifies the experience of a black hole because of the effort we all exert to avoid existential anxiety, fears about just being here on earth.

Keeping away from a black hole seems like a good tactic, but it isn’t the same as healing. If left unhealed a black hole only gets larger until it becomes a gaping wound. The largest wound you can have is the wound of separation, the trauma of losing love, spirit, God. This is the primal black hole; it breaks you off from the source of love, peace, and joy.

Adapted from The Path to Love, by Deepak Chopra (Three Rivers Press, 1997).


Elisa F.
Elisa F4 years ago

I "am" enough...We "are" enough. Thank you Deepak and Care2.

LMj Sunshine
James Merit5 years ago

Thank you for sharing!

Janine Hofmann
Janine H6 years ago

Thank you very much for this article.

If there can be a "Black Hole" in a person, then it could also be possible that it started to exist in childhood, or maybe before birth?

Thinkin back in to my own childhood, then there already has been a "Black Hole" inside: all around me said, i was silent and shy. And when i see photos with me, i can still see on which is a true smile with happy eyes (the photos when i didn't know that they were made, when i did something like in childhood playing with sand in holidays), and on which is a smile, that was a wish by the person who made the photo. A life with wearing a mask, because no one wants to know, how someone really feels. Then this mask started to break, because it took too much strenght (and there has ever been only little strenght) to hide, and everyone is confused and upset. I have to learn hiding again, playing as if everything is fine, as if there is no depression, no borderline, no trauma... They tell that i look better than some time ago, they don't see, that everything is still the same, so it seems as if i really learn to hide again :( all that pain, grief,... that "Black Hole"...

Maria Papastamatiou

"The largest wound you can have is the wound of separation, the trauma of losing love, spirit, God. This is the primal black hole; it breaks you off from the source of love, peace, and joy." I think this to be very true, and the only way to fight darkness is light. If we try to send the light of love to our wounded self and others, then perhaps we will achieve something.

Loo Samantha
Loo sam6 years ago

thanks for sharing

heather g.
heather g6 years ago

Life requires a lot of work on oneself ..... I don't really see why others should suffer during that process. It's personal work....

May Howie
may Howie6 years ago


Dot Alexander
Dot A6 years ago

Carina Engstrom says
Mar 31, 2011 12:03 AM
In this era of "The Happy Ego" it's hard to take time to sink in the black hole of unhappiness and anxiety to explore what it is all about

Thank you, Carina! I see this as a societal problem as well. "Living In The Age Of Entitlement" points out this is a core issue of our times. Perhaps we can reconcile this paradox by understanding this 'happiness and the light' from a little different angle.

Victor Frankl's book: "Man's Search for Meaning" does just such a thing. In the concentration camps, and near death, he discovers his innate happiness exclusionary of circumstances. His story is meant to remind humanity that there is an untouchable core of YOU which can experience this state 'unconditionally' - just as love is felt, as a mother to infant, as the soul to the self. A gentle reminder can help us re-establish this connection to the true self.

May your happiness be shared by many this day and always.

Brenda Gilbert
Brenda Gilbert6 years ago

Having done quite a lot of my own "black hole exploration" I can truly say that however scary, painful, difficult, challenging, terrifying, confusing, gut-wrenching it may have been IT WAS WORTH IT! Perhaps with less resistance I could have made it easier for myself but I seem to have needed to do it this way. The rewards of greater awareness, love, compassion, understanding, tolerance and general peace of heart and mind were there all along. It just took me a while to realise it! And I really don't care whether the comparison is scientifically accurate - the symbolism is just PERFECT. Thank you Deepak!

Elizabeth M.
Elizabeth M6 years ago

Thank you very much for this interesting post Deepka. I described to my physciatrist of 14 years, of the deep hole I felt, as though I had lost my spirit and my soul. I was given more drugs which haven't helped. I can't seem to get back the love, peace and joy but I pray for it.