Victim or Creator?

In life, attitude is everything. The circumstances that have shaped our lives are as unique and individual as our personalities – no two are the same – yet our ability to grow as individuals, to evolve into more compassionate, loving and conscious people, depends not on what has happened to us, but on our attitude towards these situations. When faced with hardship, do I lie down or step up? Do I resist, or embrace the situation for growth?

Ultimately there are two attitudes we can take in life: the attitude of a victim, or of a creator.

The victim cannot see beauty, abundance or the inherent perfection of each moment, because he has an idea of how things should be, an idea that has inevitably been violated, an idea that is at odds with what is. This inconformity is anger – anger towards life, towards god – but it manifests in the victim as a passive, depressive heaviness, inert and seemingly disinterested, appearing more like sadness than anger. It is hatred of self, violence towards self. It is the ultimate rejection of what is: violence towards life.

The only way to break this victimism towards life is by taking the role of the creator. A creator praises their creation, a victim criticizes. A creator lives in appreciation, a victim in complaint, not taking responsibility. These are total opposites. The creator embraces whatever comes its way. It has a yes to everything, and so life is lived in abundance. A victim, on the other hand, is resentful and negative. They cannot see the perfection or the beauty, because they have a rigid idea of how things should look. Shrouded in a cloak of passivity, this is the ultimate rage: it is the rejection of existence, the denial of what is.

Whenever I look at my life with a no, with a better idea of how things should be, I am rejecting life. Because I cannot control, I will not play. I cannot understand, so I will not accept. Such is the obsessive extreme of a fearful intellect; its complications suck all the joy out of life. Consciousness lives in the union of the heart. When you live from the heart, there are no questions. When you are the absolute, the desperate need to understand disappears, it is engulfed by the pregnant joy of pure being. The heart wants for nothing more when it has found love.

How do I transform from victim to creator? By focusing on consciousness, on the silent depths that lie within us all, until I become the mind without thought. Why? There is no why. It just is. Itís just to experience being that. When you see your resistance, let go. Remember that when I flow, when I surrender, I am being god. When I am fighting, Iím a resented child that wonít take responsibility. Something could be better in this moment… something is unjust… itís not true. Because god is everything. God is in everything; you are God within everything and itís all your creation.
And god is joy.

What are you Focusing On?
Can You Love Unconditionally?
Finding True Freedom

Isha Judd is an internationally renowned spiritual teacher and author; her latest book and movie, Why Walk When You Can Fly? explain her system for self-love and the expansion of consciousness. Learn more at


Latoya Brookins
Latoya Brookins4 years ago

I should have been reading the articles in this section since I first joined Care2. I am really enjoying these.

I favorited and shared.

Daphne H.
Daphne H5 years ago

Change your attitude ... change your thinking. This will actually change your brain 'shape' and you will be less likely to fall into victim thinking in future.

Sadashiv D.
Sadashiv D.6 years ago

I came to know the meaning of unconditional love when I started playing with my grandson

Eternal Gardener
Eternal Gardener6 years ago


Roxana C.
Roxana Cortijo6 years ago

In other words: you can't stop the waves but you can learn to surf. Thanks for sharing.

Pamela H.
Pamela H6 years ago

What it boils down to is our choices. We cannot blame others when we realise that we are all where our choices have led us. If we want change then we need to make different choices.

Loo Samantha
Loo sam6 years ago

thanks for sharing.

Taina B.
Taina B6 years ago

great...and true

amber c.
amber c6 years ago

Great article - Susan S, your comment made it all make sense for me, thankyou

Rani Lyons
Rani Lyons6 years ago

beautifully written. the concepts are difficult to understand let alone intergrated into life. there have been times in my life when i have found that flow, connected to the creator that i am and it's been a beautiful experience. It's easy to sustain...until 'something' happens. Then i am knocked out of my beautiful experience. It takes a long time to find the flow again. But it's all good and serendipitous.