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Friday Funnies:
1 year ago

Not sure if any of our membership could possibly be a potential celebrant of having had or perhaps looking forward to having a 50th wedding anniversary, but regardless, I think you'll get a kick out of this person's story.

 

Today's Joke

The Secret to a Long Marriage

With a man soon to celebrate his 50th wedding anniversary at the church's marriage marathon, the minister asked Pete to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to maintain his marriage with the same woman all these years.

The husband replied to the audience, "Well, I treated her with respect, spent money on her, but mostly I took her traveling on special occasions."

The minister inquired, "Trips to where"?

"For our 25th anniversary, I took her to Beijing, China."

The minister then said, "What a terrific example you are to all husbands, Pete."

Please tell the audience what you're going to do for your wife on your 50th anniversary."

Pete said, "I'm going to go get her."

1 year ago

James, my friend -- as a happily married lady of 40 years and having been spawned from parents who were married for 67 years, I hope to make it to those 50 years with this same incredible man to whom I am betrothed.  But, I can promise you that there is no way in heaven that he would live me ANYWHERE without him unless there were extinuating circumstances beyond my control! 

1 year ago

Tara I'm going on 41 years married and I would not trade for anything. I think the trick was to understand and obey your  wedding vows. Plus whats funny is when we both got married we bought a dictionary and crosssed out the word divorce , so the word divorce was no longer in our dictionary. We still have that same dictionary. God bless my wife. Like I always said that she was a gift from God.and I thank God everyday. Without her I would not be here right now.

1 year ago

Tara Jane and Frank, congratulations to both of you.  Frank, my mother always said that the secret was to never say the word divorce as once spoken it was something to consider and that was not a good idea at all.  Yes, there are some situations where there is no choice for both parties well-being, but for the common day-to-day differences, work it out is the secret.

Wonder Why?
1 year ago


Why the sun lightens Our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why don't you ever see the Headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Why 'abbreviated' is such a long word? 

Why is it that Doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why lemon juice is made With artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made adding real lemons?

Why the person who Invests all your money called a broker?


Why the time of Day with the slowest traffic is called rush hour?

Why didn't Noah Swat those two mosquitoes?

Why they sterilize the Needle for lethal injections?

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff they make that Indestructible black box out of?!

Why don't sheep Shrink when it rains?
Why are they called Apartments when they are all stuck together?

I like this one!!!

If con is the opposite of Pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so Safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the joy and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)
Only In This World
1 year ago
.....do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

.....do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters..

......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put Our useless junk in the garage.

…….do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in Packages of eight..

.....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


This post was modified from its original form on 11 Jan, 15:35
1 year ago

Why does a woman buy a bra and a pair of panties??????

 

Why is it called a building when its already built shouldn't it be a builting.?

 

Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway?

1 year ago

Frank, excellent questions and see, we make no sense.  I may have to research the pair of panties as I would like to know why. Same with pair of pants.

1 year ago

Glad to see Fun Fridays, or whatever they shall be called, is taking off. I had my share of smiles today on this page.

 

And for the two of you having been married over 40 and almost 50 years, that is commendable.

 

We have a "young couple" who play music for us at the Moose Lodge who where child hood sweet hearts and since their high school days, have been together. They are both about my age (that is 70) or within a year or so of it and not long ago celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. They celebrated it by taking the same cruise to Alaska that Carole and I just took this past summer. Only difference is that Carole and I would have to be married  until 2050 in order to be able to celebrate that one. I'd be 108 and she'd be 104. Any of you want to join us?  LOL LOL. We'll need help getting up the gang plank, I'm sure.

 

This couple, at their age, act like they are still young enough to dance the night away to the 50's -60's  music that they entertain us with for 5 hours every Saturday night though and we sure do hope that they last a long time.

 

 

 

Enjoy your day.

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