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MURPHY'S LAW AS APPLIED TO COMBAT December 22, 2004 3:25 AM

1) friendly fire - isn't

2) surgically precise airstrikes - aren't

3) suppressive fires - won't

4) you are NOT superman, marines, fighter pilots, & gunship pilots take note

5) a sucking chest wound is nature's way of saying slow down

6) if at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike

7) if a stupid idea works, it isn't stupid

8) your artillery is most likely to fall short when you are in the forward OP

9) try to look unimportant, the enemy may be short of ammo and will wait for a more valuable target

10) never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you

O'TOOLE'S COROLLARY TO MURPHY'S LAWS:  Murphy was an optimist

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 December 23, 2004 4:34 AM

Rule # 1 , If someone tells you to break into your neighbors house and steal a can of kerosine,,,, tell them to lead the way, and then lock the door behind them.

Americans are slowly learning what Iraqis already know,,,, there is no place like home for the holidays.

Bring the kids home and send Adolph W. Bush to Iraq.

Thomas T. Panto

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 December 29, 2004 2:16 AM

11) Always remember your weapon and the four second fuzes in your grenades were made by the lowest bidder on the contract.

12) If your attack is going really well, you are in an ambush.

13) The enemy diversion you are ignoring is their main attack.

14) The enemy will invariably attack at two times: A) when they are ready, B) when you are not.

15) No OP Plan survives initial contact.

16) No combat ready unit will pass inspection.

17) No inspection ready unit will pass combat.

18) Incoming fire always has right of way.

19) The easiest route is always mined.

20) Teamwork is essential, it give the bad guys targets besides you.

21) If you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.

22) Try not to draw fire, it irritates your buddies.

23) If you are short of everything except the enemy, you have found the combat zone.

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 January 07, 2005 10:52 AM

24) If the enemy is within range, so are you.

25) Tracers work both ways.

26) The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

27) Things that must be shipped together as a set, aren't.

28) Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and most especially during both.

29) Weather is not neutral.

30) If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.

31) Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of dangerous amateurs.

32) The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

33) Pilots should remember their friendly air defense gunner's motto:  SHOOT 'EM DOWN, SORT 'EM OUT ON THE GROUND.

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 January 08, 2005 8:36 PM

Good one DavidH. I'm gonna send it out in my emails.  [ send green star]  [ accepted]
 
 February 14, 2005 12:26 PM

34) Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

35) When you have lots of ammo, you can't miss.  When low on ammo, you can't hit the broadside of a barn.

36) The one item you need most is in short supply.

37) Interchangeable parts aren't.

38) The bullet with your name on it is less worrisome than the thousands marked "To whom it may concern."

39) The side with the simplest uniforms usually wins.

40) Combat is most likely to occur on the ground between two adjoining map sheets.

41) If your platoon sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.

42) The most dangerous friendly fire weapon in the inventory is a 2nd Lt with a map and compass.

43) The enemy does not watch you, until you make a mistake.

44) A clean, dry uniform and pair of boots are magnets for mud.

45) The worse the weather is, the more likely your mission will require you to be out in it.

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 April 17, 2005 10:25 PM

46) The complexity of any weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.

47) Field experience is something that you do not get until just after you need it.

48) No matter which direction you have to march, it is always uphill.

49) If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything they chose to prove.

50) BODY COUNT MATH: 3 guerillas + 1 probable + 2 pigs = 37 enemy KIA

51) BEER RATIONS MATH:  2 beers X 37 troops = 49 cases requistioned

52) The least experienced new guy will usually win the Medal Of Honor.

53) A Purple Heart just proves that you were smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive it.

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