Hi all brothers and sisters, Sometimes even if we have forgiven others, we might not be able to love them. But Bible asks us to love our enemies. Please share your experience in trying to love your enemies, its result, and your experience in God throughout the issues. We are here to help each other to grow and to encourage.

Sigh, not to say loving my enemies. I shall reconcile with my younger brother. Our relationship become distance and frustration from my brother. Ever since his preteen, he developed his own friend circle, thoughts and belief, and stop telling me things as he thinks I'm immature, and unfit to teach him. He is frustrated with my unambitous mind, which always become our course of argument. Deep down I know he loves me, it is only me that often didn't play my big sister role right. From childhood I was naughty, always get the biggest slide, and bully my younger brother. Of course now I stopped to bully my brother, but I am still very emotionaless, due to my selfishness and our distance in growing apart. I feel so shame to be called Christian because I can't reconcile with my brother. Please pray for me to learn to love my brother. Thanks.

Forgiveness can be made a hard thing to do but really shouldn't be. Especially when it comes to forgivng ouselves. We must remember that what we are unable to do in the flesh only He can do through us. Just a willingness to change will give the Lord opportunity to help you do what you cannot do on your own. The principle of the cross remains the same. He died for us when we were helpless in our sins. He then rose and offered us His life. All we have to do is believe and trust and He can do the rest through us.

I will pray for my relationship with my family. You are right in another email that I need to let go of my self important and come empty before Lord. Thanks.

You aren't alone in trying to get along with your brother, although I have stopped trying. I just read a post he made on his heart board that said he has no sister named Donna, and that I care more about the cat population of the world, than I do my own nephew. This has been going on for years, and I went to him one time, and explained the different kinds of love, to get him to quit being so jealous and angry. Then he told me that If his son and my cat was in the road, and a truck was coming, if I didn't save his son, then he would disown me as a sister. I lied and said I would save his son, as how could I really know what I would do if the truck never came down the road. I happen to love my cats the same as he loves his son. They, he and his wife that hate each other and fight all the time in front of people, keep inviting me to different affairs. The last was my nephews graduation. I do not want them inviting me to these things, as I have my hands full with 50 cats. Now, this time I also had a good excuse as my foot was attacked by a cat, and I was unable to walk for weeks. I tried, and then I would scream. I also tried using a cane. The swelling went down, but infection lasted over a month. My younger sister tried to tell him about it over the phone, and he cut her short, and said he didn't want to hear it. So in his post on that board, he told them I cut my foot in the yard, and the swelling went down, but it was still sore, so I couldn't go. I stopped going to the Christmas parties at my sisters, as I smoke, and don't want to be invited to their porch again. Last Christmas she wanted me to stop in for 15 minutes, but I had a madman living next to me here, and was afraid to leave the house. He stole the girls house, and was starting fires in the kitchen, plus hacking her house apart. He also was in my driveway every night putting poles up, and lining bricks, then railroad ties, and putting colored bags on the poles to mean we were at war. He was a mountain man, and even hung a deer on his front lawn. He is gone now. However, I sure didn't want to leave this house at that time for fear of him harming my cats. Anyway, I told the whole family that they are always welcomed to come here. I am the oldest with the most responsibility with all my cats. My brother makes a big issue out of his son being a blood nephew, and that means nothing to me. I raised my cats, and even bottle fed some, so it is common sense that they are my children. I feel bad too, but all I can do is pray for his hatefulness, and he thinks I am the problem here. Donna

Have you ever found that at times it is harder to forgive and love a family member than it is someone else? This is not a trick question....just wondering or does it only happen to me?

I think it is harder when it is a family member, especially if there is sibling rivalry, but without my parents, the rivalry is gone. The family thing is tougher than just friends. My brother is a hard person for anybody to get along with, as his love is very conditional, and in an instant, he will ditch a friend, or chaulk someone off as in done forever. I use to have that kind of tempermant, but I don't feel that way anymore since the Holy Spirit has come into my life. With my brother it is a no win situation because he wants me to forget my life I guess. I have been there for him all his life, and he is the type that no matter what I have done, it doesn't count when there is something that I didn't do. It's ashame because it is not likely that he will live much longer. He has too much wrong with him. His wife has forced him to go to affairs, and so then he puts the pressure on other family members to be there too. I will not be told what I have to do. Donna

I don't know what to say to your situation. Perhaps my love isn't cat, but I do have my most treasure things. It is hard to love others' love ones more than ours. I support that even if you care about your cat, you still care about your nephew and him. But I don't know how he could have seen that. To him, he would never imagine such things, but if you ask him whether he would save you or his son, then he would know your tough situation. And we never know what we would actually do in a situation until it happens. I'm sure you are a person with faith, so please pray for his understanding, and pray that Lord will find a way to let him know how you're really feeling toward him. I shall remember you, when I pray. Thanks for sharing.

I appreciate what you said. God Bless, Donna

I recently learned to love my enemies. And just in time, too. It was a Sister-In-Christ at church. I was beginning to wonder if she was even saved. She would always verbally destroy her husband in front of the entire church whether he was there or not. Before I met her God had already been dealing with me on this issue and it was not easy. Finally, I started asking God to perfect His agape love in me towards my enemies (specifically this Sister) and help me to look past her wrongs and truly FORGIVE her. Eventually, after a lot of praying, she got the Baptism of the Holy Spirit and it completely changed her whole attitude, even the way the spoke. Then I finally started getting along with her. We are actually friends now. 

Also, this past week I got a job working with her husband and since I have no car of my own, I have to carpool with them every day. And she drives because they have three children of their own and a forth teenager she takes to school. So I see her EVERY day. Talk about God being an "On time God!" I learned that lesson just in time!

In Christ,

Jeremiah  

I'm so glad to hear that once again the power of prayer and God win over our obstacles in interpersonal relationship.

Love, and bless you,
Vivian

Hello,

  I am wondering how many of you my subject matter grabbed? Well, I speak the truth. I get along with pretty much everyone but the people that I might not get along with besides my husband I am rarely around due to being too sick to be around much of anyone anyway. Before I was this sick, I got along with most anyone.

 I am trying to still love him, or might I say, I am trying to still be in love with him, but if I am still, it is stuck way deep inside where I have tucked it away so far so when he sticks the knife in my heart (daily) it will not cut me completely into.  

  I must still love him, otherwise I would have taken all of our cash, divorced him, never speak to him again, etc. I was going to tell you how I do my my part in trying to love my enemies, but I feel I cannot due to my crying from the pain I am feeling.

  How can you tell when you are going to have a nervous breakdown, because I am scared that this is what is going to happen and I am being dead serious. I am changing topics now & am sorry, I really do not mean to.

Why does he still want me here when he would be kinder to a dog in the street than he is to me? You prob. wonder why I am still here. Well, I have nowhere to turn & when you are disabled & need someone to take care of you, what do you do? I guess I keep on hoping for hope with us.  I feel lower than scum anymore. I hate myself for being with him.

Sorry I posted like this, this is not who I am supposed to be, it is what I have become... I am too ashamed to put my name or I would.

I wouldn't be ashamed to have known you.

In fact, I'm proud of you- to have the courage to speak up.

I know it is hard for now to not hate yourself. Because I hate myself for some other reason too.

I have two disability. Schizophrenia and reading learning disability.

My parents are frustrated with me, but I know they do care. Yet their frustration, expectation, and words have destroyed my self esteem.

Now I don't know your situation well. But I like your choice of not divorcing, because once you are married, you become one.

While you can't change him. You can change your choice of reaction. Keep praying, and I will keep you in my prayers.

Remember, no human love is perfect. Only God's love for you is perfect.

Maybe you can rediscover you by spending time alone in learning new hobbies, giving your partner some free time.

Don't be afraid. Feel free to express yourself here.

I'm always here.

Love,
Vivian

I have begun to pray for the "terrorists", but I almost feel like a traitor in doing so. I think it is easier for me to say I forgive them, because I have lost no one close to me as a result of bombings. I've been reading Matthew, and notice that Jesus says to pray for our enemies. Any thoughts? 

Pray for enemies can be hard, but even if we blame the object of our anger, it help no one to solve the puzzle. Instead we could try to pray for the transformation that Christ can do in our enemies life, without judging them.

It is easy to say but it is hard.

Oh Lord, please pray for us to have wisdom in forgiving our enemies. Please heal the hurt in everyone's mind. Lord we know you are the only one that can transform people heart. May the spirit of God speak to all of us, and be with us. Let us feel your power, your resourceful wisdom and solace. Please speak to each of us here who the very moment can't grasp why You have planned the unforenate events in the world. In the world, we are result of each other choices, our own choices, and temptation from the evil, but without your permit, all these things might not be allowed to be happened. Yet you have chosen these things to be happened in these places, because there is something higher that we can't grasp. Yet who is to say that if today we live, tommorrow will be better, or today we die, and tommorrow we won't suffer. But everything has a time of beginning and and end on this earthly thing. The only thing that is eternal is Your love. You will always here for us. Would I die for my parents? I am not sure, yet You have died on the cross the sin of the world. Your love for us is such. And you are the living Lord. You are always with us, and trying to draw us close. May you open our ears to Your Word, and empty our heart. I pray this in Christ Name. Amen.

i had a mean Boss at a highway Construction Site( iwas head of Quality Control there) & at one time he Cursed me on the Phone.I kept still & Prayed for Wisdom from God how to deal with this, then went to his room & as i opened his door ,he jumped back afraid that i will Hit him...instead i told him:"i am SORRY for what happened, i must have REALLY annoyed you that you would Curse Me.."" He melted from shame & started Appologizing to me, Next sunday he & his wife asked me to take him to MY Church, i did & By coincidence the Pastor could not make it due to an Emergency & so I Preached...He was SOO affected when we came out, and was amazed that i could Preach so powerfully ( and so was i...it as the HOLY SPIRIT surely) , started reading the Bible & a great change occured in him & his family( he was from another religion before)...PRAISE GOD...Imagine what would have happened had i responded to his insult in kind....But My reaction brought him to CHRIST....Blessed be HIS Name.

Love your enemies? - that's the hardest thing Jesus has ordered us to do.

Only a very strong or blessed person can do that. (Someone like you Gase). I'm not neither so strong nor blessed. I'm just a weak woman with lots of hard memories from the past. So I can only try to atchieve that perfection of unconditional love.

Power of prayers and God's support is great. Thanks to it I can control my instant negative reactions to some negative remarks from my boss, collegues or my students (who can curse on the teacher much worse than one could imagine). I can pray for them later in the evening the same as I pray for a woman who happened to become a wife of my beloved one. She became my "enemy" marrying him but at the same time she became his "best friend" that means if I love him I should and I can love her too. I can even feel sorry for the most unloved and hated person- Sadaam (he killed or sentenced to death thousands) and I can pray for his soul to be saved after his death.

But as someone above have said there are some things that are too hard to forgive and some "enemies" close to us who are hard to love with an open heart.