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Ted Cruz Coloring Book on Sale Now and Ready to Brainwash Your Children

Ted Cruz Coloring Book on Sale Now and Ready to Brainwash Your Children

Written by Ian Millhiser

Are you a new parent terrified that the liberal media will turn your child into an Obama supporter? Or do you just need something to entertain your kids during those long drives to Tea Party rallies? If so, then a brand new coloring book is just the thing for your family! The “Ted Cruz to the Future™ – Comic Coloring Activity Book” is a “non-partisan, fact-driven view of how Texas Sen. Rafael Edward ‘Ted’ Cruz became a U.S. senator and details, through his quotes and public information his ideas for what he believes will help America grow,” according to its publisher Really Big Coloring Books.

Some of the “non-partisan, fact-driven” things children will learn from the new book are:

  • Ted Cruz Is a Man of Great Virility and Stamina: Many “career establishment politicians are far too out of shape, old or overweight to even perform such a magnificent feat” as standing on the Senate floor and talking for over 21 hours. But not Ted Cruz!
  • Ted Cruz Can See the Future: Cruz spoke with “clairvoyant precision” about the “quickly approaching Obama Care disaster.
  • Cruz Is the Constitution’s Guardian: Ted Cruz is a “passionate fighter for limited government, economic growth, and the Constitution.
  • America Is a Christian Nation: American history is “replete with official references to the value and invocation of Divine guidance, including official Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, House and Senate chaplains, the national motto ‘In God We Trust,” the Pledge of Allegiance, [and] religious paintings in the National Gallery.” So hands off those government-sponsored Ten Commandments monuments!
  • Providing Health Care to People Who Can’t Afford it Is Worse Than War: Cruz’s failed stand against the Affordable Care Act “was so important because millions of citizens believe Obama Care is worse than any war. At least American soldiers have weapons with which to defend themselves.”

The book also warns children that President Obama and his administration will “use any opportunity to go after the Second Amendment right and other constitutional rights such as free speech.” So make sure you snatch up a copy quickly before Obama bans it.

This post was originally published in ThinkProgress

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Photo Credit: Really Big Coloring Books, Inc.

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87 comments

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11:21AM PST on Dec 26, 2013

too weird!

6:17PM PST on Dec 21, 2013

He would have been a good candidate way back when the country was 13 colonies since that seems to be the extent he can get his mind around.

12:28PM PST on Dec 19, 2013

One last thought on the Ted Cruz coloring book. I just watched a snippet of Colbert discussing the coloring book on his show on the Daily Koz website. The front cover reads something to the effect that this is based on the actions of a real live superhero. Obstructionist Tea Party Senator Ted Cruz a real live superhero. Cruz must be doing peyote buttons for he is surely delusional.

11:57AM PST on Dec 19, 2013

Sorry I meant letter Y at the end. I'm bad.

11:56AM PST on Dec 19, 2013

Is anybody else aware of the fact that if you took the name TED CRUZ and removed the letter U and replaced it with the letter A and added the letter Z at the end that you would have TED CRAZY?

10:19PM PST on Dec 16, 2013

Only in "Texas".... I think the key word on the colouring book is "Comic"

10:10PM PST on Dec 16, 2013

Don't be too hard on Ted. After all, you have a whole website to indoctrinate the masses, this is just a coloring book.

5:36AM PST on Dec 15, 2013

Vote him out!

10:41PM PST on Dec 14, 2013

what a nut job

2:43PM PST on Dec 14, 2013

Notice "White House" on the top leaflet? Fat friggin' chance.

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