The Most Awkward “We the People” Petition Imaginable

I wonder if, when the Obama administration first set up the We the People petition site, they thought it would be used to essentially tell them to frack off. If they didn’t, boy do they have egg on their faces now! Why? According to The Huffington Post, residents from over 20 states have signed or filed petitions asking for permission to secede from the union.


I just…I can’t deal with you anymore, America. I’m mostly looking at you, Texas. Every damn Texan I know has joked about how Texas is so self-sufficient and doesn’t need our burdensome government. Just do it, already. Or don’t. Just stop talking about it. You think you can do this better? Try it. I dare you.

Or how about you, Arkansas? You weren’t the biggest moocher per capita, but you also weren’t the smallest. About that $4,541,020,980 you got from the federal government in fiscal year 2008. Yeah…we’re gonna need that back. Look, as a citizen of the United States, I’m perfectly happy to give money to family. But my neighbor? I’ll gladly lend you my lawnmower. I just expect it to be returned.

Honestly, I might have expected this from a few fringe banana nut bars, but some of these petitions already have over 10,000 signatures! To get a response from the White House, a petition must get 25,000 signatures in 30 days. This petition doesn’t need any more signatures!

I know it makes me a snob, but I’m going to be honest with you. I kinda expected this from the American South. But New York! You realize that in 2008 you were in the top five states when it came to receiving federal aid, don’t you? And Oregon! Why?

I have so many questions, not the least of which is who among us thinks this is a proportional response to an election outcome that you’re less than pleased with? (Oh stop being naive. These petitions were created on the heals of the presidential election.) We’ve been doing this whole representative democracy thing for a while now. We’ve elected crappy presidents and presidents whose stars have only shone brighter with time. Do we really need to pitch a fit every time someone is elected with whom we disagree?

Trust me on this. I know. I live in Kansas. Besides Kathleen Sebelius and Nancy Boyda (that one time), I never get to elect someone that is even in the same ideological ball park. And you know what I do? I deal with it. Because I’m an adult. And adults argue positions and philosophies without stomping off in a huff.

It sucks to live in a place among people whose values don’t reflect your own. But you know what, states who want to secede? You don’t necessarily live in that place.

So Obamacare will go into full effect. So taxes on the wealthy might go up. You know what won’t happen? No one is going to take away your guns. We are not descending into socialism (not that I don’t think that wouldn’t be a bangin’ idea). We’re still a capitalist society where money can buy you way too much.

In short, secession is not a proportional response. The fact that so many people seem to think that it is is wildly disturbing. But all in all, I’m not too worried. Gawker put it pithier than I ever could:

[I]t remains to be seen if this movement is more than a toothless temper tantrum thrown by armchair revolutionaries.

Smart money is on toothless temper tantrum.

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Image credit: Shawn Rossi


Philip S.
Philip S.4 years ago

I guess people don’t realize that there are varying degrees of seceding, it doesn’t necessarily mean break off and form your own country. It could mean that a state won’t enforce Federal laws or even a specific law.

Mary L.
Mary L.4 years ago

I'll happily help Texas succeed! Where do I sign? Oh, I did already.

Citizen C.
Citizen Citizen4 years ago

The petition doesn't need anymore signatories? Perhaps you should read a page of their book, Care2

Angelica Caniense
Angelica C.4 years ago

I do not favor turning AMerican land over to them, in the event that they are serious. I favor mass deportations - and not the voluntary kind called for by Romney! Let's all help them pack.

Robby C.
Past Member 4 years ago

Kevin- you & I agree for once. Yes, many of us are fortunate to either have the knowledge &/OR experience to avoid variable rate- not everyone is so fortunate. As you know, I often have strong opinions & do not apologize for that, but I will apologize if I think I've been proven wrong, etc, OR if I came across the wrong way. I've done both, several times- I'm far from perfect. In this case, I'm sorry if I came across wrong b/c I firmly believe what I feel, even if I didn't type my point 100% clearly. So no, it's not the people's fault- it's mostly the banks. Although in SOME cases, some of the people bore some responsibility- some fudge their incomes vs credit & expenses, etc, to get higher loans. But you're correct- the banks pushed these loans & I'm sure some people were advised to fudge their #'s a bit. So, they got their loans, were making payments, banks raised interest rates & screwed families out of their homes. Then the banks got bailed out while the people lost homes to foreclosure. Unbelievable! I do know of several people who got caught up in this fiasco & the friend I mentioned before, really got it.In his situation, the banks really took advantage. Banks have a responsibility to explain variable rate loans & be sure people know the risks. There should also be a cap on how high the rates can increase.

Kevin Brown
Kevin Brown4 years ago

But the message seems to be that people of moderate incomes wishing to own their own home somehow caused the economic meltdown and that just isn't true. I would NEVER take out a varible rate mortage, but I have the advantage of education and knowledge on my side, many people did not.

The banks KNEW they were screwing these people over but just did not care, they wanted to make money on the loans and knew they would "bundle" them and pass the risk to others while they laughed all the way home (with their profits). The moderate income home buyers were the victims not the culprits.

Robby C.
Past Member 4 years ago

Kevin & Robert- please re-read my post- nowhere in there did I say it was the people's fault. While some do have to bear some responsibility for taking non-fixed rate loans to begin with, it was the banks that approved the loans, often for people who shouldn't have qualified. That's the banks fault- those people would've been better served to have been rejected for such loans. Again, I know several people who lost their homes b/c of this & while at least one friend was smart enough to know better than to take a variable rate loan, he told me that the bank did not specify how much the rates could increase- yes, he should have asked, but maybe the bank should have told him how much his rate could increase. Some 50% is way beyond reason IMO. His was a two-income family w/one daughter. But an extra $400 a month was too much, especially as we went into a depression.

Robert H.
Robert Hamm4 years ago

Robby they didn't ALLOW less qualified people the hunted them down and promised them the MOON. They KNEW the people couldn't afford the homes. They KNEW it. THEY coerced them into signing on the paper and then ran off. Country wides was the worst of the bunch. The owner finally hid all his money and left the company. Stop blaming the poor people for the demise of the economy. The poor have no offing power!!!!

Kevin Brown
Kevin Brown4 years ago

Really, you are repeating the fantasy that the economic meltdown was the fault of poor people trying to own homes? I thought only Rush Limbaugh listeners believed that nonsense.

Robby C.
Past Member 4 years ago

JA Carlton- Nice link. but it did leave one thing out. many here remember the bailouts, etc, & they started w/the housing crisis. Many banks were encouraged to allow loans to people who could not afford them. This goes back a LOT further than 2001. All the way back to Jimmy Carter's "everyone should own a home." Many of these loans were not fixed rate. So when people had their rates raised on them, they suddenly could not afford the payments (in addition to those who really couldn't anyway). I know people who were making $800 mortgage payments that went to ~$1100-$1200 overnight. Now that's a big jump, particularly if one was barely making $800 to begin with. The banks should not have allowed such loans & the people should not have taken them- bush started bail outs & obama continued. At that point, I'm not sure what could have been done, but I have a few ideas. In the end, I have no prob w/the video- I do agree w/it. But still, I saw no mention of the housing crisis & many of those loans were encouraged by the Clinton administration. I also remember when Clinton was about to have a balanced budget. I found it disgusting when people all over the country were trying to figure out where to spend the money before they even had it. I can't understand why some didn't suggest saving the extra money for several yrs & then deciding, but... Here we are. Anyway, lots of factors- the video gives a few.