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Loading...We Need Mothers to Breastfeed In Front of Teenagers
This week is World Breastfeeding Week (WBW). The theme for WBW 2011 this is engaging and mobilizing youth through inter-generational learning. The goal is to broaden breastfeeding support and learning outside of the pregnancy/newborn stage. Too often, the first time that women (and men) learn anything about breastfeeding is when they are preparing to have their first child. A large percentage of first time mothers have never seen anyone breastfeed prior to the first time they hold their newborn baby to their own breast.
Breastfeeding is normal and natural, but it isn’t always easy. A lot of mothers find it awkward, difficult, and may even see it as disgusting or off-putting. In large part, this stems from the fact that they haven’t seen women nursing their babies as part of every day life, in the same way that they see women walking their babies in strollers, giving them pacifiers or bottles, or playing peek-a-boo. Men are often concerned about their wives breastfeeding in public because they don’t want them exposing their breasts. Unfortunately, these attitudes come about because breastfeeding is so often hidden away and done only in the privacy of the family home or at best under a nursing cover in a public space. In order for breastfeeding to seem normal and natural, it needs to be visible. It needs to be something that everyone has seen and everyone is familiar with. It shouldn’t be something that people see as awkward or disgusting.
I am the oldest of four children and my mother nursed all of us. My sister, the youngest, is seven years younger than I am. Unfortunately, I have no memories of my mother breastfeeding any of us. I can hardly even picture my sister as a baby and my earliest memories of her are from the time she was about two years old. So when I became a mother 22 years after my youngest sibling was born, I didn’t have any images of my mother nursing them to draw on. How should I hold the baby? Sure, I’d seen pictures in books and online of the different nursing positions, but it seemed so awkward. I simply hadn’t had enough exposure to people nursing their newborns.
As a teenager, I spent a year on an exchange program in Australia. I stayed with a family that had five children, from teens all the way down to a one year old. My host mother was still nursing the one year old and I do have clear memories of her sitting on the couch and nursing him, as well as of him sleeping in their bed (likely to facilitate nighttime nursing). I’m glad that I had this exposure to breastfeeding a toddler and to co-sleeping when I was a teenager, even if they seemed weird or strange for me at the time. I think those memories subconsciously helped me to see those things as normal and gave me a concrete role model as I set out on my parenting journey.
Most women do want to breastfeed, but many of them are not able to meet their own breastfeeding goals due to challenges that they run into on the way. Among younger mothers, the breastfeeding rate is lower than among older mothers. This may be partly an issue of education, but it is probably also because older mothers are more likely to have friends who already have children who act as breastfeeding mentors and role models for them. Younger mothers, however, may be lacking those role models.
If more mothers were to breastfeed in public, especially around teenagers and young adults, it would provide them with important exposure to breastfeeding in the years prior to becoming parents. It would help them to see that breasts are not just sexual, it could give them the confidence to breastfeed and it could give them concrete visual examples to draw on as they hold their own baby up to their breast for the first time. It would give them more places to seek support, make them feel less alone, and give them more confidence.
Have you breastfed your baby in front of teenagers or young adults? Did you see women breastfeeding when you were a teenager or young adult? Please share your stories of inter-generational breastfeeding learning.
Related Stories:
CDC Says Hospitals Need To Do More To Help Moms Breastfeed
Nursing Moms Alert: Make Way for the Milk Truck! (Video)
Are Breastfeeding Bans Just a Way To Keep Women in the Home?
Read more: breastfeeding, mothering, nursing, teenagers, WBW 2011, world breastfeeding week
Used with permission by Joni Rae Latham
Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may
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+ add your ownIf Sex education was MANDATORY and children were shown women breasting feeding, they would see that it is a natural and beautiful experience of life. They would learn that breast feeding is best for the baby for health reasons. Within a few generations women would be breast feeding all the time in public whenever the baby was hungry without shame or embarrassment. That is the only criteria.
If you don't want to see a woman breast feeding, DON'T LOOK. Why should the baby be inconvenienced by your insecurities and moral indignation?
@ Himanshu S: "if there is any women who is ready to put her video of feeding baby on net i will pay her."
Free, from YouTube ... lovely video of mommies bonding with their babies ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAO-mLSxx5U&feature=related
It's good for the young to learn to notice and not stare. And to understand the sacred bond of motherhood.
A breastfeeding ban? Babies feed on demand. Why not a ban on bathrooms, they can be pretty disgusting. Anyway, the sound of suckling beats screaming in my ears.
Thanks.
Some of these comments reminded me of my younger, nursing days. I had my wee babies with me. My son was 3 months old. I was in a dimly lit corner of a restaurant, nursing him, with a shawl covering him & my body -- very discreet! The waitress kept ignoring me, walking past me with averted eyes. My daughter was only 2, crying, hungry! Finally, I got a waiter to stop & wait on me.
The "young lady" was stuffed into a pair of pants which clearly outlined the crack of her vagina in the front & the crack of her buttocks in the back! Her top was so low cut, you could see her cleavage almost to her midriff! LOL ... she looked like a hooker -- and she had a "problem" with "what I was doing under there"!
Before leaving, I made sure to point this craziness out to her -- and let her know she needed to grow up. I also left a very nice tip for the young man who behaved like a gentleman & waited on me with great respect!
This was almost 30 years ago, and we're STILL trying to educate folks! Pathetic!
Hooray for milky mammas! We need more nurturing women everywhere! We get enough images of violence & degradation, we desperately need more wholesome images, more nature, more kindness & nurturing, and MORE women doing what is NATURAL with their bodies which is to live & care & enjoy their bodies, not just to sell crap. Teenagers see tons of porn, and disgusting advertising, degrading and ridiculous videos on the internet of the human body we do need to let them enjoy the natural and traditional and wholesome pleasure of watching a mother nurture her child - with attachment, with gentle play, with cuddling, and yes indeed with human milk! Re-normalize the breast!
we eat in public - there are food courts everywhere and nobody is offended by other people (including babies and toddlers) shoving food into their mouths! Breastfeeding is just what it says, the baby is fed in the way other animals feed their young. My husband was perfectly fine about my daughter (he is her stepdad) feeding her baby in front of him, so although she was nervous about the process, his mature attitude helped her initial nervousness. One or two people were a bit odd about it in public, even though she was well covered - it was in the days before restrooms and baby facilities were available - and my husband spoke up for a mothers right to feed her baby as she deemed fit. He was very polite but pointed out that he would put both of his 'girls' welfare first. Therefore we never had any real problem and I think he might have made a few people see the light! As for the having sex/ taking a dump argument, well, a lot more people do the first than you'd think, so that argument is null & void! And the 2nd, well, there are hygiene laws that cover that, which is why. These examples are not eh same thing as breastfeeding at all.
You're quite Right, Sarah M. And it's not just for when the child is Newborn. A lack of natural Bonding time is Taken by the Baby as a sign of Rejection. This can Continue to affect the relationship Between child and mother for the Rest of their Lives/Relationship, and may Well account (at least in Part) for the dramatic Social upheaval, Family breakdown, the “Throwaway Mentality”, Mental illness, Addictions, and Crimes throughout the World (include Rape, Abortion, Pornography and Other denigration of Women and girls). Even when the Baby becomes an Adult, that Adult's physical and mental health depend, in Large measure, on the way they and their Mother were treated when the Adult was a Baby, or even in the Womb. Many of us know the Effects of that, first Hand. Thanks, Sarah M. for bringing This important aspect of “Natural Bonding Time” into the Conversation here.
Breastfeeding desperately needs to be accepted as a natural bonding time between mother and baby that is best for the baby's physical and mental health. Consider what it was like before baby formula came along.
There are certain parts of the body that are considered private and personal and what is done with those parts is normally done in private, pee,bowel movements, etc. i consider breast feeding the same - do it in total privacy. It is embarrassing to do this in front of mixed company. The same goes for childbirth. The fact that someone would show this publically is just simply disgusting to me. Let the woman have some privacy for god's sake during such a special time or i guarantee you it will be looked upon as pornography by many. Don't shame women more than is already done. this should be a private act between patient and physician.
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