12 Practical Tips For Mending A Broken Heart

By Sienna Sinclaire for YourTango.com.

You may remember the old song “Breaking Up is Hard to Do” … and it’s the damn truth! Time will heal your aching heart, but the meantime can be a mean time and breakups are a real bummer. Thankfully, there are some things you can do to speed up the process and get that breakup in your rearview mirror ASAP.

More from YourTango: How To Break Up With A Man: Don’t Be Ambiguous

While recovering from a breakup, don’t deny yourself a good cry, but once you do, move on. Build a bridge and get over it. Everyone responds to pain in their own, unique way. Some people take longer than others to move beyond a broken relationship. The depth of your pain usually depends on how long you were with your partner and how much you really cared for them. Nevertheless, you should give yourself permission to express your feelings, mourn the loss of the relationship and heal the hurt.

Dr. Daniel G. Amen, author of The Brain in Love claims, “When we love someone, they come to live in the emotional or limbic centers of our brain. They actually occupy nerve-cell pathways and physically live in the neurons and synapses of the brain. When we lose someone through a breakup our brain gets disoriented. Since the person lives in neural memory connectors, we expect to see them, hear them, feel them and touch them. When we cannot touch or talk to them as we usually do, the brain centers where they live become inflamed looking for them.”

Dr. Amen also said that over-activity in the limbic brain has been associated with depression. This is why we tend to isolate, have trouble sleeping, lose our appetites and cry when we’ve got a broken heart. Dr. Amen continued, “A deficit in endorphins, which modulate pain and pleasure pathways in the brain, also occurs which may be responsible for the physical pain we feel during a breakup.” Fascinating!

Whether you did the breaking up or you’ve just had your heart broken, there are ways to make your situation just a little easier to bear. Read on for 12 quick and easy tips that will turn your breakup into a breakthrough:

1. Drink St. Johns Wart Tea. This may sound silly, but breaking up can take a toll on the body. This rejuvenating tea helps heal the mind, body and spirit. Intense emotions surge powerful chemicals to the brain which can be physically exhausting. Anxiety and rejection cause dramatic changes to the brain’s level of dopamine, also known as the “feel good” neurotransmitter. Because breakups initiate a fight or flight response the body often reacts with depression, anger and sadness. It may also cause a jolt of adrenaline to the body, which makes people irrational and hyper-sensitive. St. John’s Wart comes in both pill and tea form and is said to return the brain to a natural state and calm anxiety.

2. Eat dark chocolate. Who doesn’t love chocolate? Of course, you should never indulge in the kind of chocolate binge eating you often see in romantic comedies. In moderation, dark chocolate has a positive effect on one’s sense of well-being and cognitive health. Chocolate contains phenylethylamine (PEA), the same chemical your brain creates when you feel like you’re falling in love. It may be hard to pronounce and difficult to spell but PEA encourages the brain to release endorphins, which is why chocolate makes you feel happier. Darker chocolate is best because it contains less calories and fat than the richer, lighter chocolates. For a limited time only, it’s okay to eat chocolate and not feel guilty but be careful as you don’t want to put on ten pounds in the process of lightening your mood.

More from YourTango: Starting Over Tips From YourTango

3. Make a date with your girlfriends. Spend the first girl’s night out taking tequila shots and dish to your girls about how he did you wrong. Get it all off your chest and have one of your friends drive your drunk ass home. Cry into your pillow until you don’t have any tears left and your forehead hurts. Do this once when you first breakup but after that, he’s off limits as a topic of conversation. The sooner you stop talking about him with your friends, the sooner he’ll become a faded memory. Hanging out with your girls after a breakup is great way to help get your mind off so-and-so and focus on your future. Soon, you will see what a fool he is and it will make you realize he did you a favor. Have fun with your friends and enjoy your life as a single gal.

4. Show your smile. Chances are no matter who did the breaking up, your ex is still following you on Facebook. Let him know you’re not sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. Take pictures of you laughing and loving life when you’re out with your girlfriends. Snap one with some random guy. Plaster the sexy, fun and flirty photos of you painting the town red all over the Internet. Don’t be fooled men are very territorial, even post-breakup. It will drive him bonkers seeing that you’re not at home pining over him. Then, after flaunting a month or two of your fabulous new life, simply delete him and block him. This is the best way to move on and regain control. He is yesterday’s news.

5. No rebounds. The most important thing to remember when you’re navigating the aftermath of a breakup is not to rush into a new relationship. Many people give in to the desire to be validated by looking for approval from a new lover. This is a recipe for disaster. Date and have fun but be cautious when it comes to letting the next person into your heart. Don’t create a quasi-relationship with someone just to get over someone else. It’s not fair to the other person and it will eventually bite you in the ass (and not in the good way).

6. Go away on holiday. Plan a break from your usual routine. Take a trip to a nearby town you’ve never visited. Hop on a vacation cruise across the ocean. Go to the spa and get a massage. Whether it’s by yourself, with family or friends a change of scenery will do you some good.

7. Show yourself some love. We tend to forget we’re loveable when enduring a breakup. Take care of yourself by staying healthy. People often get sick and depressed after a breakup and eat or drink too much to numb the pain. They stop exercising, wallow in self-pity, gorge themselves with potato chips and isolate. Be sure to continue your normal self-maintenance regime. Workout, eat right and be sure to take your vitamins. Do things for yourself like take a relaxing bath, go to the gym, get your nails done, send yourself flowers or buy yourself sexy lingerie. Get off your bum and take action so you can get him off your mind. Loving yourself after a breakup and taking care of yourself is the best revenge you can plot against your ex.

8. Masturbate. Yeah, I said it. Just because you’re not having sex with your ex anymore doesn’t mean you should stop having sex with yourself. Having an orgasm rushes the brain with serotonin and dopamine. These chemicals increase mood and appetite and will make you feel fantastic. Don’t feel guilty this is a natural aspect of the human experience and pleasuring yourself is completely normal.

More from YourTango: Advice for Single Women

9. Spring clean. Clear the clutter, girlfriend! Get rid of your ex by trashing any music that reminds you of him, gifts he gave you or any other miscellaneous items around the house associated with your relationship. Donate everything to your favorite charity. You will feel better knowing you gave to a good cause and you’ll get a tax write-off! Get rid of any photos of your ex. If you can’t bring yourself to do it, have a friend do it for you. Don’t forget to de-clutter your virtual reality as well. Remove and untag photos of your ex from your social networking sites. Keep in mind, you can always stash everything in a box if you’re not ready to give up on the notion that you might get back together. Ask someone to hide the box from you. In three months if you know you’re not getting back together, toss the box and your ex out with the trash.

10. Staying friends with your ex. When your ex says “Let’s be friends,” you need to move on. There is no being friends. But there is a difference between being friends and being friendly. Being friends down the road is a possibility but only when you no longer have feelings for that person. So until that time comes forget about being friends with your ex.

11. Join a dating website. Do this ONLY when you feel it’s time. Don’t rush it. Post your profile online and see what happens. You don’t have to go out on dates right away but it will feel good to know you’re still wanted. Because you’re fabulous, guys will be hitting on you in no time and it will be a real ego boost. This will certainly help with your confidence and make you realize you are desirable. You’re a great catch! Plus, we all know the best way to get over a man is to get on top of a new one!

12. Learn from your breakup. Recognize this as an opportunity to learn a life lesson. You can transform this experience into one with a positive outcome. Take time to cater to yourself and fulfill your own needs for a while. Ask yourself some important questions to see if there are areas of your life that need attention. Why didn’t the relationship work? Do you need to learn to be more responsible, more independent or more interesting? Maybe you need to focus on your career or work to get balance in some other area of your life? Take this sacred time to find out what you really want in your next relationship but do things you enjoy in the meantime. Partake in activities that will make you feel good about yourself. Go out and get a bold new look, change your hair color or buy yourself some new clothes. Make a commitment to exercise and get healthy. Get out and meet new people by joining a social club. Focus on how you can do better at your job. This is your chance to spring clean your soul, start over, rejuvenate yourself and get ready to rock the world!

Sienna Sinclaire® – The Single Girl®: Your Naughty Lifestyle Guide

This article originally appeared on YourTango.com: From Breakup To Breakthrough: How To Mend A Broken Heart.

985 comments

Jessica S.
Jessica S.7 hours ago

My name is Jessica Scott from Texas in USA. Am here to testify of a great and powerful spell caster named DR AKERECO of drakerecospellcaster@gmail.com I was so confused and devastated when my boyfriend left me for another girl. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. So i contacted this great spell caster for a help. He helped me cast a return love spell on him and just within 2 days my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up. Simply contact the great DR AKERECO via email: drakerecospellcaster@gmail.com You can call or whatsapp him on +2348071258262. his website is: akerecolovespell.wix.com/akerecolovespell

sharon maric
sharon maric13 hours ago

i want to use this means to announce to the whole world the existence of strong power to cast any love spell by Dr OBIGBO. i have always doubted love spell because i have been scammed severally by fake spell casters. i almost lost hope until i met a friend who introduced me to Dr OBIGBO and gave me his number. i then called him and explained my relationship problems to him. he assured me that he will help me cast a love spell to get my Ex Lover back and that it will take two days and after which my Ex Lover shall return back to me on his knees. i decided to try him because the source of his contact was very legit. to my greatest surprise after all the long suffering, within 48 hours of contacting this man, my ex lover phill came back to me begging me and now we are happily married. i have promise to castigate his strong powers to the whole world so people who need his help can contact him for help. he is very strict and straight forward with his work and he does not delay work. you can contact him through the following means


Email Address: OBIGBOLOVESPELLCASTER@OUTLOOK.com or call his mobile number:+2340852498003

 .
.17 hours ago

The spell caster others have been talking about called Dr. UZOYA that helped them get back their ex back, is real. I contacted him on Wednesday last week after my lover broke up with me because we could not bear children and I could not find a good job, As I am speaking now, Dr. UZOYA brought my lover back to my arms within 2 days. I have seen with my own eyes that Dr. UZOYA is real; he is real the right spell caster everyone need. Kindly contact him for any kind of help now I have a good Job and I just tested positive showing that I am pregnant. You need to contact Dr. UZOYA if you need any spiritual help via his private email address: [driraborspellcaster@gmail.com] u can also call him on +13019098775

Amanda M.
Amanda M.yesterday

I am myers from Canada, When I eventually found testimonies about this spell caster called Dr paul , how he has helped so many people to get their lovers and broken homes back, i contacted him through his email address on salvationlovespell@gmail.com because my husband whom i really love with all my heart and also love me too, but suddenly change and turned his back on me and hated me with passion and i was absolutely desperate to get him back. Life without my husband was a real mess for me i wanted a dramatic change and I thought magic could be the solution. After discussing the resolution with Dr paul, he gave me hope that he will restore my marriage back because he is already my husband. I felt confident that he will actually make my husband return home and he did! It’s fantastic what this great spell caster has done for me, his help is priceless! I don't know what I would have done without Dr paul. He does his job so well and he is organized and highly functional, i believe he is the best spell caster i can count on when it comes to all kinds of spell, I was so felicitated that his spells worked, and if you need help, contact him now on his email salvationlovespell@gmail.com and i assure you that things will turn around for you. Thank you Dr paul.

Falcao P.
Falcao P.yesterday

GOOD NEWS EVERYONE I am very happy to tell every one to hear my name is Tony Cara i have been married four 3years and on the fifth year of our marriage, another woman had to take my lover away from me and my husband left me and 3kids and we have suffered for almost 1year until i met a post where this [dromohan] have helped someone and i decided to give him a try to help me bring my lover back home because of the kids and believe me i just send my picture to him and that of my husband and after 48hours as he told me my husband will be back, i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids and that is why i am happy to make every one of you in similar position,or other difficulties,to meet with this wonderful man and have your lover back to your self. You can contact him with this email: dromohanspaketemple@gmail.com all you can contact him whatsapp on [+2348112302647] if you do everything that he says i promise you, that your problem will solve

Helen S.
Helen S.yesterday

After being in relationship with him for 3 years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the other ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, like of issue of not be able to get pregnant for many years, lotto, his email is DRAISEDIONSPELLCASTER@OUTLOOK.COM you can email him if you need his help in your relationsh

Helen S.
Helen S.yesterday

After being in relationship with him for 3 years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the other ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, like of issue of not be able to get pregnant for many years, lotto, his email is DRAISEDIONSPELLCASTER@OUTLOOK.COM you can email him if you need his help in your relationsh

Joseph O.
Joseph O.2 days ago

Am writing this article to appreciate the good work of DR BRIGHT that helped me recently to bring back my wife that left me for another man for no reason for the past 2 years. After seeing a post of a man on the internet testifying of how he was helped by DR BRIGHT. I also decided to contact him for help because all i wanted was for me to get my wife,happiness and to make sure that my child grows up with his mum. Am happy today that he helped me and i can proudly say that my wife is now with me now on the bed and she has promise never to leave me and the family again, she is now in love with me like never before.THANKS TO DR BRIGHT FOR THE GOOD WORKS, Are you in need of any help in your relationship like getting back your man or woman or even your lost job just think of any thing DR BRIGHT CAN HELP YOU RESTORE THEM BACK TO LIFE, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, winning of lotteries, herbal cure for sickness or job promotion E.T.C. Viewers reading my post that needs the help of DR BRIGHT should contact him now on his E-mail: [templeoflightandsolutions@gmail.com] and you can visit his webiste http://drbright.yolasite.com/ he is great THANKS...

Adura G.
Adura G.3 days ago

Hello friends,i am Sandra from USA, i want to thank God for directing my path to a great spell caster when i needed help to fix my home that was at breaking point,my husband suddenly begin to act strange after a couple of years in marriage,he was angry with me and the kids unnecessarily without little or no provocation,this was a real surprise to me and the kids,this began to grow worse when he decided to pack out of our matrimony home for frivolous reasons,words can not express how i felt,we were devastated,i never known my husband had a date outside our wedlock until i visited him in his new apartment and caught him with another woman,he told me he is not coming back to us that he now loves another woman,i consulted a spell caster via Email: [driraborspellcaster@gmail.com] and Call +13019098775 he cast a spell for me and within 24 hours my husband came back to me and the kids,my family is now reunited with the help of Dr UZOYA ,thank you sir.

Ryan I.
Ryan I.4 days ago

My name is Ryan Isabella From USA,I read some testimonies about a love spell caster by DR KENDA on how he has helped lots of people in bringing back their ex lovers within 48 hours, Sincerely I was just thinking if that was real and if this man could really help bring back my lover whom I love so much. I decided to contact him because I love my boyfriend very much and we have been apart for a couple of months I really missed him so much, I have tried all other means to get him back but couldn’t. I contacted: kendaspelltemple@yahoo.com and he told me that my ex will come back to me in the next 48 hours,DR KENDA released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. My ex is now back to me again.As I`m writing this testimony right now I`m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my boyfriend is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up.All thanks goes to DR KENDA for the excessive work that he has done for me by helping me to get back with my ex boyfriend. I would like to drop DR KENDA mail address and hope you see this testimony and contact him if you have a lover that you really want back so badly, His mail:( kendaspelltemple@yahoo.com )or call him +2348108174915.