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4 Ways to Make Lust Last

  • June 27, 2011
  • 5:01 pm

4. Spill your guts

The strong, silent stereotype is the last thing you want to embrace when it comes to building a lasting bond with your partner. In fact, improving your communication skills may have the added benefit of boosting your sex life. In a 2008 couples study at Texas A&M University, researchers analyzed each man’s willingness to disclose exactly what he was feeling, as well as the empathy he displayed toward his partner while she was talking. Men who scored well in both categories felt greater intimacy with their partners later on—a feeling that was reciprocated by their grateful mates. “When you see that she treats you well when you are vulnerable, you feel warmer toward her,” says Los Angeles psychologist Seth Meyers, Psy.D., the author of Dr. Seth’s Love Prescription. “In turn, when she knows that you trust her enough to be vulnerable around her, she feels more connected to you.”

Your move: Every day, start at least one conversation with your partner about a topic that interests both of you. It can be about anything, from Stephen Colbert’s latest hilarious sketch to your desire to travel the world with her someday. Don’t think of this as a duty but as a way of enjoying the time you spend with her even more. “Do your best to make it fun. And don’t force the communication—it will flow organically if your priority is to make each other feel tended to and comfortable,” Meyers says. If you can’t think of anything to chat about right off the bat, he suggests finding a couples quiz in a magazine or online, and taking it together as you watch television or eat dinner. “The point is to find vehicles to start the two of you talking.”

Related Links:
Sexless after 40? Don’t Be!
Sexual Love: Can’t Be Bought, but Isn’t Free

Read more: Love, Men's Health, Relationships, Sex, , , , , , , , ,

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Rodale

Rodale.com is a new original source for daily news, information, and advice on personal and environmental health. Rodale.com focuses on “Where Health Meets Green” topics, providing daily news stories and breaking news along with easy-to-follow, high-impact tips and advice.

117 comments

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5:05AM PDT on Apr 22, 2013

Thank you for sharing.

7:58AM PDT on Apr 6, 2013

There is definitely too much porn on Care2.

10:30AM PDT on Mar 29, 2013

Responding about this:
"
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Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/4-ways-to-make-lust-last.html#ixzz2Ox19JGJn"

That's kinda like saying that someone should take drugs to fall in love. I really don't agree with the idea.

10:27AM PDT on Mar 29, 2013

Lust isn't going to last unless there is real love. It never works for people who get together with someone just because they're cute.

5:08AM PDT on Jul 10, 2011

My comment didn't print. And yes I did go out and come back in, still didn't print so I'll repeat.

King Solomon was reputed to be the wisest man who ever lived. I disagree but...

Do what he did. Get yourself a thousand wives and let them fight over you. That should prolong the lust beyond the tantra limits.

5:02AM PDT on Jul 10, 2011

King Solomon is reputed to have been the wisest man who ever lived. Shhh-I don't agree.

Do what he did. Get yourself 100 wives and let them fight over you. That should be a real turn on that will last beyond your kingdom's demands.

12:43AM PDT on Jul 10, 2011

While there IS a difference between love and lust, I do think that it IS important that the lust last a while... being IN love waxes and wanes. This doesn't mean we stop loving each other, but, it's hard not to remain IN love, when the lust is still there keeping everything fresh...

Eventually, the hormones and physique will diminish, and it will be the memories to reminisce that will keep the romance going...

1:12AM PDT on Jul 1, 2011

Good.,Good article for newly married couples.

4:31PM PDT on Jun 29, 2011

common sense

1:08PM PDT on Jun 29, 2011

good stuff. Loving, as much and as unconditionally as possible, communicating well, trusting, and just doing it often is a good formula for many things you want success in.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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