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7 Ways to Forgive Your Parent or Spouse

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7 Ways to Forgive Your Parent or Spouse

By Marlo Sollitto,

Every caregiver has a family history. Some of that history may be unpleasant, disappointing or even abusive.  A caregiver’s experience of abuse, neglect and addiction leave lasting scars. Moving beyond the past is never easy. But what happens when someone in your family becomes ill or incapacitated and you are called upon to care for them? What is your responsibility, based on their past treatment of you? How do you take care of your parents or spouse when they didn’t take good care of you – and in fact may done have you harm?

Many caregivers struggle with the huge responsibility when it is suddenly – and usually unexpectedly – thrust upon them. They are in a quandary, because they know society thinks they should care for their parents or spouse. Some of them have religious issues about “honoring their parents,” no matter what. However, many feel that they just cannot give the emotional and physical care their family member needs.

If you are caring for an elderly family member, but feeling resentment and anger about their past actions, remember, healing can happen when emotionally destroyed families find a way to forgive. If you would like to let go of anger and forgive, but are stumped with the question of how to forgive, here are tips that might help.

10 Caregiver Confessions: Secrets We Aren’t Proud Of
How to Handle an Elderly Parent’s Bad Behavior
Why Do Elders Abuse The Relatives Who Are Taking Care of Them?

Forgiving Your Parent for How They Treated You in the Past originally appeared on

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8:29PM PDT on Apr 23, 2012

Thank you, Zee, excellent book.

8:19AM PDT on Apr 23, 2012

Good article It thank s

5:15PM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

Thank you to Zee K for your post - I will be checking out the book. May I also offer a quote and affirmation which has been very helpful to me "as I forgive myself, it becomes easier to forgive others"

4:37PM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

thank you for sharing

11:35AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012


11:04AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

Thank You for the article. After all, we all need to be reminded from time to time that when we forgive we are doing ourselves the most good, since holding a grudge does not punish the other person--it punishes the person holding the grudge.

4:36AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012


2:03AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

Thanks for the article.

12:35AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

This book goes beyond forgiveness into the realization that there is really nothing to forgive. It's a miracle book that changed my life completly. It made forgiveness E Z!

Psycho-Cybernetics From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Psycho-Cybernetics is a classic self-help book, written by Maxwell Maltz in 1960 and published by the non-profit Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation.[1] Motivational and self-help experts in personal development, including Zig Ziglar, Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy have based their techniques on Maxwell Maltz. Many of the psychological methods of training elite athletes are based on the concepts in Psycho-Cybernetics as well.[2] The book combines the cognitive behavioral technique of teaching an individual how to regulate self-concept developed by Prescott Lecky with the cybernetics of Norbert Wiener and John von Neumann. The book defines the mind-body connection as the core in succeeding in attaining personal goals.[3]

12:29AM PDT on Apr 22, 2012

However you do it, be sure you do it.

Or YOUR karma will get you~

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Disclaimer: The views expressed above are solely those of the author and may not reflect those of
Care2, Inc., its employees or advertisers.

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