When faced with a major decision, have you ever asked yourself: What if I do the wrong thing? What if I make a big mistake? Itís easy to see when the struggle is driven by fear. One way to break the habit of accepting choices made by fear is to change the way you make decisions.
Find a better way to make decisions, here:
Worry is a circular discussion in your mind. You go around and around looking over the same information, the same arguments. Itís like being lost at night in an unfamiliar neighborhood circling in your car and only realizing you are lost after you pass the same house three times.
The circling process of decision-making is driven by the engine of fear–fear of not doing it right, fear of not doing what you are supposed to do, wanting to make everyone happy, or not wanting to be criticized.
The engine-of-fear process of making decisions is all about avoiding pain. We think too much, go in circles, and if we feel uneasy about what we have decided to do, we may ignore our uneasiness or talk ourselves out of it.
There is a better way: Make decisions using an engine of love.
When you fuel your engine with love you recover your passion. Thatís because love is what excites you, makes you grow, delivers you into an expanding universe, and compels you. Love is what feels right.
Before you make your next big decision, collect information and become informed. Then let your feelings guide you, and notice whether these feelings are emotions in the moment or emotions in memory. Remember, memories are often filled with lies about what is true right now.
Adapted from BeliefWorks, by Ray Dodd (Hampton Roads, 2006). Copyright (c) 2006 by Ray Dodd. Reprinted by permission of Hampton Roads.
Adapted from BeliefWorks, by Ray Dodd (Hampton Roads, 2006).